


Damsel, Not Distressed

by NightshadeArabs



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Daredevil (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Agents of SHIELD, Avengers - Freeform, Badass female character, F/F, F/M, Multi, SO MANY PEOPLE, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2020-05-14 12:06:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 52,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19272967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightshadeArabs/pseuds/NightshadeArabs
Summary: Should I save the world? I'm not a hero. I just have powers, I don't even know what all of them are, or how I got them.Work in progress, it's long, the whole story is massive and I've been working on it forever. Poly relationships, non-relationships, cuddling, friends, injuries, general shenanigans. I have no idea where this is headed.Not really following canon.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> More tags will be added as stuff happens/as I think of them. This story has a life of it's own and I'm just doing my best to follow it.

It was getting late; the last rays of the sun were rapidly disappearing over the buildings. The air was still warm enough to be comfortable in just a light sweater, part of the benefits of the microclimate created by the city, but there was a slight nip to the breeze that indicated it was undeniably fall. The leaves crunched under my feet as I walked. There were bits of trash here and there, blown into the ally by the wind.  
“This is surprisingly clean for an ally in the city,” I commented randomly to the empty space.  
Especially since this wasn’t an upper-class borough, it was a bad part of town, if it hadn’t been for the reclamation projects there would be piles of trash here. The nice crunchy leaves were from the nearby park. I could hear the creaking of the playground equipment intermingled with the sounds made by the trees and the last few kids yelling to each other before they went home for the night. Refocusing my mind, I listened to the sounds of the city. Dogs barked and there were sirens in the distance. It was always noisy here, so I had gotten good at tuning out and focusing in on different sounds. If I wanted to, I could hear the heartbeat of the rats looking through the garbage from the pizza place three blocks over. That would quickly cause a migraine though, so I only listened that intently when completely necessary. I had learned that about three blocks were the farthest I could hear tiny sounds though, so that was handy information. Handy for what, I didn’t know now. I didn’t want to be a ‘superhero’ that path only lead to irritation, pain, and death. Not mine, but to anyone near me. Being a hero caused casualties. Anyone associated with you could be targeted, just to get to you.  
Yeah, I am jaded. So, what? I hadn’t started out life jaded, no one ever does. It’s what I had been through that made me that way, a natural progression if there ever was one. I figured that if you didn’t have at least a somewhat jaded view of life you probably hadn’t lived much of one yet. People shouldn’t be in danger just for knowing me. People shouldn’t be in danger for just being around me for any length of time. It’s guilty by association, not death by association. That’s ridiculous. Life is dangerous enough as it is, people hurt and murder each other for the pettiest of reasons. Money, love, religion, boredom, psychosis. I guess that this could also be used as an argument for being a hero. Life is dangerous. You don’t get out alive. Regardless of who you are, who you know, how much money you have. I didn’t want to think about all that right now. I just wanted to be left alone. It was safer for everyone that way. People could just know me in passing, that was safe enough. Basic interactions, not getting attached to anyone. No actual relationships. That’s what I would strive for. I had made it a long while maintaining my distance from people. I wasn’t sure how much longer that would last though, the world was getting smaller. Life was becoming more and more about the connections that a person had made. Connections can get you places. Humans seem to be all about connections. Even people who are generally solitary have a connection somewhere, even if it’s just a means to an end. I also knew I was touch starved, but damn if that wasn’t the least of my problems right now. You can’t crave connection and distance yourself at the same time. You’ll just rip yourself apart.  
Sirens sounded and grew louder, approaching the next block over; jolting me out of my thoughts. There was an uptick in the usual sound of voices, yelling, cars. I could suddenly smell blood over the smells of fall, food and trash. It smelled fresh. Someone must have gotten hurt. There was still a part of me that wanted to claim territory, swear that no one would be in danger in my neighborhood. I would have to have a neighborhood for that. Guess shaking this hero thing was going to be harder than I had originally figured. Jumping up to the fire escape, I scaled the side of the building. It’s always faster to go over than around, less traffic that way. I skittered around the air conditioning units on the building top, scattering pigeons as I moved, slinking over to the edge. Peering down I saw a person being carted off on a stretcher to a waiting ambulance. There was a puddle of blood on the ground. Officers had a man handcuffed and were holding a large knife. It had to have been a simple stabbing for things to be wrapped up that quickly and without any kind of fuss. A stabbing would explain the lack of other noises leading up to the blood. I hadn’t been listening in that direction, so any sounds of distress wouldn’t have registered. Guns were loud, smelly. Knifes were much better for being stealthy. Within a certain distance a knife was also faster and more effective than guns, even for standard issue humans. Knives, daggers rather, were what I preferred for fighting, most of what I did was close quarters anyway. Sure, I was proficient with guns, but going back to the whole guns are noisy thing. They attract too much attention.  
Standard issue humans. That’s what I had started calling them shortly after I realized I was different. After I realized there were many ‘people’ who were just as different as me. It used to be all hush-hush. Aside from billionaires in flying suits, billionaires with their fancy ‘I can save the world’ gadgets, people with abilities stayed under the radar. Operated in ways where there was plausible deniability. There might be a small circle of people who knew they existed for sure, the rest it was just hearsay. Urban legends had been around long enough that the random run in with a powered person would be dismissed. They hadn’t really seen that, it had been a trick of the light, that stuff didn’t happen in real life. As soon as they doubted their own memories of the event the powered person was safe. The average citizen didn’t know other worlds existed, and it was probably safer, better, that way. The cat was out of the bag now though with The Incident having been impossible to sweep under the rug. Everyone had reacted to it in their own way of course, there were still people who refused to believe it was real. Even here in the city, where there was still clean up and reconstruction happening, you’d find non-believers. People who found any way possible to rationalize to themselves what had happened. I had been there, I had helped during the battle of New York, of course it was just called The Incident now. I had discovered my abilities several years prior and so felt it I had to be involved, had to help, in some way. Mostly it was catching the things that managed to evade detection from The Avengers. I was slightly surprised I had still managed to evade detection, but the battle had been a mess and they had other things to focus on than an average looking woman who didn’t need saved.  
The clothes I had been wearing that day were ruined. It had to happen on a day when I was in an expensive suit for a job interview, didn’t it? I had loved that suit; it was a present from one of my prior flings. Truth be told it was the best thing I got from that man. There was a reason that superheroes didn’t do battle in pantsuits. They really aren’t designed for it. I had done a lot of damage to it myself, just to be able to move the ways I needed to. Pantsuits apparently weren’t stretchy enough for acrobatic type movements, or at least this one hadn’t been. I had never thought to take insurance out on it, and what I had heard from snippets in coffee shops was that insurance wasn’t covering most damage from The Incident anyway. They were calling it an ‘act of war’ which most policies have built in clauses against covering. Ridiculous, yes, but to be honest it was an act of war, just an interstellar act of war. Totally no way to predict or prepare for that when it could be argued that there isn’t intelligent life on this planet, let alone another one, or a completely different galaxy. Damn space portals anyway. I never made it to that interview, the attack having happened while I was on my way there. The suit may have been ruined for nothing, the building I was going to interview at was destroyed. No plans to rebuild that same business. Well, not ruined for nothing, I had saved lives wearing it. Even if I had done it with a sweater wrapped around my waist to hide the fact, I had ripped the crotch kicking an alien in the face early in the battle. Yeah, not built for fighting, noted. I just threw it in the trash afterwards. It was very shredded, with blood and alien goo all over it.  
I didn’t need the money from the job, it’s not that I really had any, just that I had no issues getting food or a place to stay. It was just going to be something to do that normal people recognized. I was going to get a job, so there would be a quick, simple answer when someone asked what it was that I did for a living. Something more universally understood and respected than just answering with, “whatever I need to do.” I had morals of course, but it was the truth. Whatever I needed to do to live was what I did. When broken down to the most basic, that’s what everyone does, but they like to dress it up with dreams and asperations. If I didn’t have a reason to leave the city in a hurry, I could get by day to day just doing favors for people and even then, given enough time to plan I could get travel expenses covered in much the same way. Just find someone with money or better, someone who had their own plane, and get in good with them. Simple, easy, and a ticket to almost anywhere. Travel and daily life were both things I had figured out quickly. The more money at someone’s disposal the more they were willing to use to further what they thought was a situation beneficial to them. I just had to be necessary, whether it was as a non-threatening pretty face or a pretty face that was also security. I could do that quite easily, presenting whatever it was that the client would want and need that would also achieve my own goals.  
Harder was continuing to stay off The Avengers radar, and that of the government, though the first was more difficult. The Avengers and people associated with them were far more willing to look in the direction of people like me than any government. Yet, if I continued to only solve simple problems and stuck to the lower-class areas of town, they’d likely never know that I existed. That was the best-case scenario, that that’s what I was going to stick with for now. It had worked well so far. It’s not that I had anything specific against them, I just didn’t want to be put on some list, or forced into situations I didn’t want to be in. That would be back to that whole hero thing. Having to save people, and having to do it under public scrutiny, wasn’t something I had ever wanted for myself. I saw what happened when they would make what the public or the government had deemed as a mistake. It’s easier to make the hard decisions when you don’t have someone that is nowhere near the action telling you how you messed up, could have done it better, should have done it this way. Shit can get messy in battles, that’s just a fact of life. Hell, life in general is messy. You can regulate things all you want, that’s great for peacetime, but shit gets broken when the hero stuff comes out. Just look at the amount of property damage from The Incident, the casualty list was relatively small, but there were billions of dollars of damage. That had been better than it could have been, but there were still calls for registration and regulation of powered people, alien hysteria, all sorts of ripples in the fabric of life that would cause a domino effect. When things change so suddenly there is always a violent push back. Humans fear change, they fear things that are different than them and there was now solid evidence all of it existed. Not everyone was going to snuggle into a blanket of denial and pretend it hadn’t happened.  
The moon was out by the time I had made it back to the building where I was staying this week. It was a swanky middle-class apartment; the owner was a cute little old Italian lady with an affinity for cats who get stuck in trees. I nearly tripped over one of them as I turned around from closing the door. I greeted the cat, rubbing its ears thoroughly, before making my way into the kitchen. Mable, the cute little old lady, had ordered from the Thai place around the corner it seemed, and left a Pad Thai container marked ‘eat me’ on the stove. It couldn’t have been very old because it was still warm, and I could hear Mable nestling into the couch, the springs creaking in adjustment to the weight of something other than a housecat. It must have just been delivered, so that must have been the delivery guy I passed in the hall on the way in. I smiled, grabbing the food and a set of chopsticks.  
I waved at Mable with my chopsticks while lifting up my container of food in the other hand and pointing to it, “Hey, thanks for remembering that I love Pad Thai. I’ll be outside if you need me.”  
She nodded at me, “I figured you could use some food, I know how hard you work yourself before stopping.”  
I smiled at her then I turned, opening and climbing out the window to sit on the ledge, feet dangling, to watch the city at night. I enjoyed people watching, didn’t matter what time of day, there was always someone to watch in the city, with so many different people on different life schedules due to shifts to cover round the clock services. 24-hour diners, police, hospital workers, they all had to be staffed at all hours. Then there were the oddballs that showed up after dark, the people with ill intentions, people who just didn’t like other people and thus went out when most were at home, and the scavengers who searched the city streets for their next meal ticket. I was friends with most of the scavengers, they all made their living here without standard jobs. It was useful to know who the other street people were. It provided a support network, if anyone had a particularly good find, they would share it. It was a way to keep tabs, both on people in general, but also on the neighborhood. If the street people could find food and shelter, then it meant that the neighborhood was doing well enough. So, if I had to confess, I probably was a little bit of a hero. Just in denial, mostly. Favors, that’s what I preferred to call them. I wasn’t a hero; I just did favors for people and was generally a good person. That didn’t have to mean anything special.  
My life had been more structured, more complicated before The Incident. I had an apartment of my own at the time, well an apartment I had earned herself. It was a constant place to end the day at though. I still wasn’t sure which lifestyle I preferred. Moving around the city, staying with people for a week or so at a time before moving on had its perks, that was for sure. I got to experience a lot of new places, see the way different people lived, the ins and outs of their lives, the little nuances that you only discover after living with someone. On the other hand, having my own place had been nice. My own rules, I could be as much of a disaster or perfectionist as I wanted. I could come and go as I pleased. A space that was all mine meant no one to answer to, no one to look out for. Not having to be surprised by anyone there to visit the actual tenant. I guessed it was about time to start thinking about real estate again. That would be a way to decide which life I preferred. Maybe after all these years of bouncing around, I should pick a place, a building, a neighborhood. Besides the challenge should make this fun, right? Flex my negotiating muscles, have a new task to do befitting of someone working towards a good-sized payoff instead of just a temporary place to crash or feed myself. I could have more than one outfit again. That would be an interesting twist. Ugh, laundry though. I would have to really scout out my building possibilities. I didn’t want a laundry mat to be a fixture in the future. Avoiding laundry mats and the need to be able to leave at a moment’s notice were reasons that I had just stuck with the one outfit. If, or when, it got wrecked I would just replace it. It was a simple way of living that I had embraced just as easily as the floating from place to place.  
I would start the process in the morning, and it would be a process for sure. Step one would be talking to the street people for leads. Even if they didn’t get apartments themselves, they were great ears on the ground. They would know what areas had apartments available and the kind of people in charge of them. That was the important part. If I couldn’t work out an exchange for housing it didn’t matter what was available and where. I certainly didn’t have the kind of monthly income required for a standard rental contract. It would be more of a pain to acquire some type of job on top of a living space. So, Hell’s Kitchen, or something like it was going to be the best bet. Those building owners usually needed help and would be willing to accept work in trade for it. I was also reasonably confident there I wouldn’t be the first enhanced person living there if I went for Hell’s Kitchen, so that’s where I decided to focus the search. I wasn’t stupid, I read the papers, I could put the pieces together. There already seemed to be a decent amount of self-policing and vigilantism occurring among the residents. That would help me to blend in even more. It’s much easier to blend in, seem ordinary, when there are other people around who also have similar secrets they are, or in some cases aren’t, keeping. I wasn’t exactly hiding per se, plenty of people knew that I was different, the people I had helped with the more complicated problems for example. I just wasn’t broadcasting it and has no plans to anytime soon. Something I had decided early on was the best way to keep a low profile was to act like I didn’t need to. The first step of being on the run is to walk, don’t run. Don’t cockily show off, but don’t act like there was anything that different about me. Just exist. I did that a lot it seemed. Just do this to live, to exist, just do that to make it day to day. No real plans for any kind of future. Simple. Uncomplicated. But life never stays that way.  
It didn’t take me very long to find a possible lead on a place to stay, a place that would be mine alone, with no roommates to complicate things. It was in Hell’s Kitchen, near the river. There was always something that needed done and someone who was willing to pay or trade for it. There would be more options if I relaxed my moral compass some, it was true, but there was enough to be done for people that didn’t require it. Everyone gets attached to something. It’s probably human nature or something scientific, phycological, whatever. I didn’t know, or care about, the psychology behind it. It’s the absolute truth, everyone gets attached to something. It can be an object, a person, whatever. It doesn’t change the fact that it’s going to happen, and it’s better if you know what you’ve become attached to. It’s when you claim you aren’t attached to anything that it is going to come back and bite you in the ass. Fortunately for me, in this case that was helpful. Sure, it was never great to be the person being bitten in the ass, but it made for a person needing a favor. A person who owned a building with an available apartment, who needed a favor. It was potentially too good to be true, but I was willing to risk it.  
The sounds and smells of the carriage horses floated on the wind as I walked up the steps to the building. I had smelled them almost as soon as I entered the borough. The streets were lined with trees and there were even more clear signs in this area of the reclamation projects. The standard issue humans probably couldn’t hear or smell them as clearly as I could, but I liked horses well enough that it wasn’t a sour point to me. I had figured I would be able to hear and smell them, since the stables for the carriages were close by. There were plenty of standard city sounds in competition with those of the horses, the traffic on the street, the normal din of conversations. It was nice to just pick out the sound of the horses and focus on that. I could also smell and hear the river behind the building. That smell was a bit more unsettling; people had liked to use rivers as trashcans for hundreds of years and that hadn’t changed at all in modern times. As if once something slipped beneath the lapping surface of the water it would never come back to haunt them. As if. I could also hear the various buildings under construction, repairs from The Incident still occasionally happening along with the updates and gentrification. It wouldn’t be long before rents in this area were climbing as rapidly as the rest of the city, if they weren’t already.  
I shook my head to clear it and pulled the exterior door open. The super was in the first apartment on the right, just inside the doors of the lobby type area. There were several parts of the building that had obviously been modernized, and then quite a few that showed the age of the building, the wear and tear that happens naturally with time in use. The combination of new and old blended into a pleasant, lived in, kind of smell. At least it was clean, I was thankful for that blessing. Across from the super’s apartment was the block of mailboxes. I turned back from the boxes to face the apartment, with what was a very substantial door and some high-tech buzzer type system, complete with a screen mounted in the wall next to it. Wow, this lady was prepared for the worst. I gently poked the call button, closing my eyes, listening as the sound echoed through the space, bouncing off the walls and giving a clear mental image of the layout. It was an impressive sized set-up for the area, from the sound of it. A couple rooms, so probably a larger bathroom and bedroom combo for the master, a kitchen and living area. It sounded like there might be a panic room in there too, there was a change in the tone when it hit what must have been the reinforcements. I opened my eyes and stopped listening so intently as I heard the solitary set of footsteps coming to the door. So, she was home alone, that explained some of the security measures. There was nothing wrong with being proactive in a city this size, especially after all the weird things that have been added to the normal ‘charm’ of large city living. What was normal for a New Yorker had always been not normal for most other people, now it just kept getting more and more strange.  
The woman who opened the door couldn’t have been more than 40 years old. She must be independently wealthy to be so young and own a building like this, security enhancements to the building included in the assessment. Either that or she had some sort of outside funding, which could possibly complicate things. Any kind of outside backers would need to be at least mostly clean. That would be something to research. There was that moral compass rearing its head again. Friendly smiles and greetings were exchanged, and I was invited in. Katherine, but call her Kat, needed a personal item retrieved. Ah, yes, a standard run and fetch mission, those were a dime a dozen. There must be a catch for it to be worth an apartment in this building. Kat produced the records of ownership for a white gold diamond and emerald necklace and earring set. Having something like that stolen would tend to make one up their security. Though it doesn’t really track as to why someone who lived in this neighborhood would keep that kind of thing anywhere near here. That belonged in some sort of vault probably. I decided I would hold off judgement for now, it did seem like this was something that really mattered to Kat, she said something about it being a family heirloom, the date on the authentication documents was from the late 1800s. Keeping something close for sentimental reasons was something I could understand, though I was sure I would never have the chance to be sentimental about something worth so much money myself. The memories associated with it sure, I could see myself having memories I wanted to hang on to eventually, but memories of someone wearing jewelry worth the price of a small midwestern house… not so much. So, this woman must be from a wealthy family. I absently wondered what they thought of her getting involved in real estate in Hell’s Kitchen, if they were even still around to care, what a possible trust fund baby was doing with her life that lead her here. A challenge indeed. Track down this jewelry set, and Kat would set me up with one of the vacant apartments of my choosing, with the bonus to Kat of a live in, under the radar security guard. That part hadn’t been specifically stated, but when I had implied it, Kat had been relieved and pleased. What was I signing up for? I guessed I would likely find out when it happened. No risk, no reward, right?  
“Nothing risked, nothing earned.” I repeated these words to myself all the while I mumbled curses under my breath. I had started tracking the jewelry down. I knew it wasn’t going to be a simple job, someone stealing something like that had to have the connections to move it once they stole it or it was worthless. That was if they were interested in it for the money. If they had wanted it for other reasons that would make my job exponentially harder. If someone stole it and just stuck it in a drawer somewhere, I could be shit out of luck finding it anytime soon, if ever. That would amount to a wild goose chase. The only thing I could hope was if they had done that, they would be stupid, and cocky, enough to brag about it to someone. That was something that I could usually depend on. Criminals with big mouths were the best criminals in my opinion. People loved to feel important, loved to show off, they wanted to feel validated and to do that someone needed to know what they had done. I’d stopped counting how many jobs I’d completed just because someone couldn’t keep their mouth shut. Of course, I had to sort through those who were empty braggers, but it was worth it for the ones who were telling the truth. Lucky for me this seemed to be a standard someone looking for something shiny to sell heist, and I had found the initial thief quickly. That scrawny little white boy had been easy to get talking, I didn’t even have to intimidate him, just be a pretty face with an open ear. It was amazing he had lasted this long, so he must have been fresh. He had heard through gossip that there was a rich person living in Hell’s Kitchen, on a ground floor, and decided to have a look. Once he was inside her apartment, he had grabbed the whole jewelry box without even looking inside it. He then admitted that he struggled to fence the bigger ticket items, and that he had taken them to one of the local clubs known to be involved with shady deals. I laughed at what he got paid for his haul and dumped him in front of 616 to let the cops sort him out, his taped confession tucked into the pocket of his vest. The next step was to find out where the pieces had gone from the club, if they had even been able to move them. They’d given that idiot what amounted to pocket change for that box, and even without the set I was looking for it had to have been a rich haul. Kat hadn’t cared about the rest of the jewelry; her insurance had given her enough money to replace it.  
It was loud in the club. I could hear the music clearly outside without even using any effort. I hoped this lead was going to be worth it, loud noises for long periods of time, like club music, was always an obstacle for me. I had some ear plugs, that would help. Hopefully no-one pulled them out this time to try to talk to me. ‘What was it with guys trying to pull out ear plugs to talk to random women anyway?’ I growled to myself as I put the ear plugs in and prepared to step inside. It was easy enough to get past the doorman, a pretty woman in a dress could get into almost any club in the city. That was another thing I had picked up while working all those favors. A nice enough dress, some flashy expensive looking jewelry and act like you owned the world. Velvet ropes would part, the pickiest of bouncers would gladly welcome you in. I went with a basic style of pretty for this outing, this club wasn’t one I would need to pull out all the stops for and I wanted to play the crowd correctly. Once I was inside, I started to note the layout of the building and decide the best routes to take and how to find the right people to talk to. Also mapping the best ways to get out quickly should the need present itself. I figured I should start at the bar. Bar tenders are the unofficial psychiatrists of the working class American. Need a lead on an item or a person? Hit up the most popular bar in the area and chat with the person behind the counter. Even if they didn’t have direct information, which was rare, they would have some idea where to get it. People told bar tenders everything, whether the bar tender wanted to hear it or not. If the bar tender didn’t have the information odds were one of the regulars would. I never left a bar completely empty handed. I made my way through the throngs of people nearly having clothed sex on the dance floor. It was easy enough to get a drink, but the bar tender seemed way too spaced out and busy to stop and talk. I started surreptitiously eyeing the patrons seated at the stools. I just needed to figure out which ones would have been there often enough to have some insight. That’s when I saw her. Elliana, Elle, a contact, and a friend, I had used many times before losing track of her. I recognized the curve of her back first, the way she held herself, shoulders square and chin high like royalty. Her hair was a rich dark chocolate again instead of the bottle blonde she had assumed before running and her smile was just as beautiful as I had remembered. She had been a fence the last time that we had talked, so that would be the best place to start. I cautiously made her approach, as to not spook my target. It wasn’t effective.  
“Hey beautiful, what name are you going by these days?”  
Elle jumped and tensed. It was small enough that no one aside from me had noticed, before turning to face me, then she visibly relaxed as a huge smile filled her face. We embraced in a tight hug. “It’s Alicia now, but you can still call me Elle without messing anything up.”  
“Okay, Elle, I am looking for something that you might be able to help me with, do you come here often?” I winced at the cheesy old pick-up line that I had just used, but this time I truly meant it and needed to know. It wasn’t just some cliché way of breaking the ice with someone.  
“I nearly live here.” Short, sweet, to the point. Oh, how I’d missed working with people like this.  
I gave Elle the description of the necklace and earrings, the information about the original thief and told her why I was looking for them. It was nice to run into a friend. Guess everyone does get attached to something.  
“So, the too long, didn’t read version is: I need to find these goods, then I can have a steady place to live again. I figure that five years of floating place to place is probably good and it’s time to see if I like stability again or if it drives me crazy.”  
Elle gave her signature killer grin, grabbed me by the hand and led me through the door hidden from the patrons in the shadows next to the bar.  
“You won’t even owe me for this, in fact you’re doing me a favor since you say that this ‘Kat’ you’re working for doesn’t even care about the rest of the contents in that box.” Elle reached up high on a shelf, shoved some food service stuff out of the way and pulled a small box down, placing it in my hands. “It’s way too hard to move something like this with no notice and the longer it sits here the more paranoid I get.”  
“So, you’re the fence here? How do they feel about your moral compass?”  
“They don’t care as long as I am still bringing in the money, which you know can be done while still following the rules we made all those years ago. I still don’t kill people who don’t deserve it, I still don’t steal from people first unless they can afford it, and whatever profits I make from the dirtier deals that walk through that door go into charities.” Elle shrugged. “Really wasn’t that hard to convince them.”  
I nodded, relieved. I believed Elle. I had known her long enough to know when she was telling the truth and she was right now. That was all that mattered. I could return the items to Kat in the morning, tonight I would see about crashing with Elle. They would be safe enough in my pocket and I needed more local intel. Get a better feel for the neighborhood by talking to someone who both lived here in the light and was involved in some of the dark underbelly. It had been too long since we had midnight margaritas and waffles. We would have to fix that.


	2. Chapter 2

We caught up on life in Elle’s apartment. We were both wearing fuzzy pajamas, supplied by Elle, with a margarita close at hand and a plate of stacked waffles on the table nest to us. We were breaking the waffles into pieces and dipping them in a bowl of maple syrup. Elle had her hair down now, there was still a wrinkle or two in it from the elastic and clip she had used to put it up at the bar. It was long enough in the back that it brushed her shoulder blades as she moved, but there were a few strands that fell short, framing her pale face. Her light grey eyes danced whenever she laughed and lit up when she smiled. It was amazing, even with all the things Elle had seen, that her smile still reached her eyes and she was always ready to laugh. Elle was a standard issue human, but she was better than that. We had been in a mess or two together and Elle had held her own. It was refreshing to work with someone I knew I would not have to save all the time. I knew she didn’t look it, but Elle was tough as nails, and brilliant too. It would be good to have someone like Elle in my corner again. Maybe this had been a good idea after all. The rest of the night was spent discussing old flames, some of the favors we had both done to get by, some of the weirder things that people tried to fence and just general gossip to fill the gap since we had seen each other last. It had only been a couple years after The Incident that Elle had to drop off the map for a while, she had ended up with a stalker and while he was being tracked down and handled Elle took a vacation. I was the one tracking him down. He was never going to bother anyone, ever again. By the time she had gotten back and gotten re-established into the city I had moved on a few times, doing favors for apartment stays and I was in a completely different circle of people. It was sheer luck that I had come to Hell’s Kitchen and found her. That lead had been worth it, loud music and all.  
I took the box back to Kat that next morning. She was so happy to have it back, undamaged and so quickly that I didn’t even have to explain why I hadn’t found the rest of her jewelry. I was just going to comment that I hadn’t been sent after that, but at the same time the less I had to divulge about any of my contacts, personal or not, was better in the long run. Contacts are only handy when they aren’t angry at you, or worse, in jail. Though a jailed contact still beat a dead one. That was never pretty, or convenient. She absently handed me a set of keys with the apartment number on them, she was still thoroughly checking the condition of the jewels and thanked me again. I left her to her intense staring and prodding and made my way up the stairs. The building had an elevator, but unless I was in a hurry, I typically avoided them. I was fit enough that a few flights of stairs wouldn’t be a problem. I would eventually have to check out that noisy, confined, metal box, just to see if it was something I could tolerate, it would make moving a lot easier and if I had any guests over they would probably not want to take the stairs with me. Elevators that are well lit, quiet and have functional escape routes aren’t common in apartment buildings in my experience. Though a building this maintained might be a different story altogether. Most people look at you funny when you live several floors up and take the stairs. Unless you had a medical reason, a bit of physical exercise never hurt anyone. Once I reached the sixth floor, I pulled open the fire door and stepped into my hallway. My apartment was 601 and it was right next to the stairs. I had done that on purpose. It would be handy, I’m sure some sort of superstitious belief kept this one available most of the time. That was fine by me, especially with how I preferred to take the stairs. The door unlocked and opened easily. The hinge was well greased, so it swung silently open to reveal the one-bedroom flat that was to be mine for as long as I needed it. I guessed I would need to source furniture and such now. The apartment came with kitchen appliances, they seemed new as well. Kat had told me that the building had its own laundry suite in the basement, so I wouldn’t have to use any of the local ‘public laundry facilities’. She could be wordy about some things. It was kind of cute to be honest. So, I would also need to get basic laundry supplies when I went for things to stock cabinets. If I was going to have them they should have some basic items in there. This was nice, though it was hard to tell if it was just because it had been a long time, because it was fresh and new, or if I was going to prefer this type of living. The view from my bedroom window looked out and across the river. Another bonus. I had really lucked out in finding this place. The living room was on the street side, but that was fine. I wasn’t completely sure how much time I would be spending in each room right now and the bedroom seemed more likely to be the place for me to hide from the world. The walls were a light tan, with the baseboards and headboards being a stained wood brown throughout the apartment. That color scheme would be fine. Utilitarian to be sure, but not annoying. I would need to get a bed first, then places to sit and tables. My stomach growled. Food apparently was also somewhere close to the top of that list. I checked the fridge just out of habit. Turned on and waiting for habitation, but clean and empty. I snooped through all the cabinets and closets just to get an idea of the place. Then I closed and locked the door, so I could find some food and work on getting my apartment furnished.  
I decided I would start with some of the local street people, see who was paying under the table or in trade in the area for work. I would start this right after I hit up the nearest place I knew I could go to get food, which was one of the local sandwich shops. I had probably ten dollars in my pocket and knew that amount would easily feed me there and I would have change left over for later if I needed it. I wasn’t always sure how hungry I was going to be and when. That was one of the annoying things about being me. Sometimes I could nearly go a whole day not really eating. Other times I would put pie eating contestants to shame with how much I had to consume. In fact, there were a few times that I had resorted to participating in an eating contest to cope with those days. If there was one scheduled conveniently close when that level of hunger hit. I decided on a classic Italian sub with all the fixing, paid my discounted price for it and went to the closest dry goods store for some household basics. There were several condiments that could easily be collected from fast food places, the ones that couldn’t be I grabbed and took home. Then I went to work tracking down some furniture.  
“Yo, doll-face, you needin’ a job?” Joey drawled as I walked up to the door.  
“Yeah, I need some stuff and I need it from the kind of places that expect a cash payment for it. You know how it goes.”  
“I got you covered.”  
Joey handed me a piece of paper with some words scrawled on it and opened the door for me. It was my powered person pass. Joey listed jobs for everyone on the board, special jobs were handed out based on ability. I didn’t tell him about myself, he just knew. I wasn’t going to ask either. I went inside and checked the board to see if anyone had posted standard jobs, passing the note off to the person at the desk. They gave me a flier in return. There were some buildings that needed cleaned, on the outside. They couldn’t get equipment close to them, so the cleaning crew would have to scale the building to do the job. It was right up my alley. Joey sure knew how to pick his desk help.  
I smiled and nodded, “I’ll take it. I still know where to get the supplies. I’ll be back at the end of the day to collect payment.”  
They tilted their head in acknowledgment and I went out through the back of the building, grabbing the supplies out of the storage closet on the way. The rope was just for show, but it made for less of a crowd watching me work when I made it look like I was just some crazy rock climber type person cleaning the windows and sills than if I did it freehand. The money was good, so I didn’t mind the work at all. It was fun and had a quick turn-around. There is almost instant gratification to be found in cleaning things. Unlike something you invest time in and must wait for results, you get to see the fruits of your labor instantly. Sure, these windows wouldn’t stay clean for long, but that was just job security as far as I was concerned. I went into the building I was to work on and took the stairs to the top, securing the rope to a handy pipe. Knowing it didn’t need to support my weight made it easier to find places to tie it. I dropped it over the first side of the building and set to work, repeating the process with the other sides of the building until I was done. This building had a water access on the top and bottom, so it was easy to fill my buckets as necessary with minimal disruption to my groove. The buildings that only had the access in one spot took way longer. I collected my things, loosed the rope and took the supplies back to Joey’s building. He was a collector of things, jobs, resources, people. I was never sure how he got started or why, but I was thankful for the work. His contact list would be very valuable when and if he decided to get out of the business. The desk agent handed me an envelope of cash for my efforts and I went off to buy a bed. It would only be enough for a mattress, but that would work fine for tonight and I’d repeat the process tomorrow. See what Joey had for people like me, see what jobs were posted for anyone to complete and just happily plug away until I had what I needed. Some might call it simple, but I didn’t want, or need, anything more. After all, there is no shame in a simple life. I’d read that in a book once and liked it. It fit me well. In the weeks that followed the bare, open spaces of my apartment were gradually filled with some very basic household items and random bits of food and leftovers made their way into the fridge and cabinets. I poked at my mismatched, random collection of silverware and smiled. This was good. I could do this. Maybe there was something to this ‘normal life’ thing. I still didn’t want to pursue a standard job, but I had long ago proven to myself that just wasn’t something I had to do to get by. I guess I could just tell people I was a private investigator or something. I’m sure there is some sort of job title I could slap on what I do. Gopher, fixer, investigator, security guard, arm candy, I’ve done it all in some capacity. I have even walked dogs, dog and pet sat and house sat before.  
I laid there on my bed in the dark, listening to the dog in the apartment above me murder something with a squeaker in it.  
Squeak-et, squeak-et, squeak-et, squeak-et, squeak-et, silence, thunk, skitter, skitter, squeak-et.  
I didn’t mind the noise, I wasn’t sleepy yet anyway. I was more amused than anything. I could only assume that the owners were used to it and thus sleeping through the ruckus, were playing with the dog or worked overnights and had gotten the toy as a distraction for the dog while they were gone. I listened more, no the dog was alone in the room. So, the dog was playing with itself while the owners weren’t home. Adorable. I continued to listen to the dog throwing the toy and chasing it, the squeaking continuing as it caught its ‘prey’. I listened further and could hear other people settling down for the night, other dogs and a few cats. There were also some people that had various small pets and fish. It made for a pleasant chorus of noise to fall asleep to. Too much silence could be deafening, listening to your own heartbeat for hours on end. No outside noise, weather, animals, general life noises, those were the best to fall asleep to, those sounds could really drown out thoughts get you out of your head and give you the opportunity to sleep.

I sat in the corner of a small coffee shop, browsing through a newspaper left on the table and waiting for my drink to be finished. It was a small treat for myself. The colder weather making me want a few simple comforts. So, I was going to have a sugary flavorful cup of steamed milk and espresso now with a scone for breakfast, then later I would have some soup. I looked forward to fall and winter for soup to become standard fair. I thought that soup was good any time of year if I was being honest, but when it got cold out it became especially tasty and a lot more readily available. I could also have it as hot as I could stand it without burning my tongue without it making me too warm to function well. Summer time soups had to be consumed in restaurants that had the AC turned out way too far or eaten room temperature or even cold. There were a handful of soups that tasted fine, or were even traditionally served that way, but the wider variety of soups were best nice and hot. I could count on the Italian places having steaming bowls of minestrone all the time, or find somewhere with amazing chicken noodle, maybe look for one of the Cajun places and have a steaming bowl of gumbo. Yes, gumbo and maybe some hush puppies, that would be a good option for lunch. I’d have to see where the food trucks were parking and decide if I wanted to hit and actual shop or a truck. Depending on which ones were out and where they were at I would know the best options to satisfy my craving. I would have to hit an internet café or just break down and get a laptop for myself. I had squirreled some money away that had been extra over what I needed to furnish my apartment. It would be good to have a way to access the internet from home.  
I sat there listening to the idle chatter of the other customers, the tapping of computer keyboards and electronic beeping of phones and tablets, the whirring sounds of the espresso machines, the hiss of the steam wands, the flurry of all the foot traffic in the café and on the sidewalk next to it. The city was slowly waking up, not that it every really slept, but the noises changed with each differing group of people. Then there was the hum of the constant traffic, car horns, bike messengers, the sound of air brakes on the city buses, the occasional sound of a truck transporting goods rolling by. The lifeblood of the city, the people, going about their days. Going to work, coming home, meeting new people, falling in love, ending relationships, just living life. The rivers lapped against the banks, against the pylons of the bridges used to cross them. The birds all sang their songs as they looked for food. I could hear the pattering sounds of the rodents moving along pipes and wiring in the buildings and along the subway beneath us. This was occasionally punctuated by the sound of a passing train. The electricity hummed along merrily as it powered the city.  
“Large Mayan Mocha with a shot of espresso!” Chirped the kid behind the counter.  
My drink was ready. I grabbed it, thanked the barista and moved back to my table. Popping the lid off I dipped a bit of my orange scone in the froth at the top of the cup. This was just what I needed, it really hit the spot. Next step would be to go to an electronic store and pick out a laptop. This could be a fun little day of shopping. Maybe I was becoming normal. I’d bring my ear plugs for the crowds, just in case, but other than that I was honestly looking forward to the trip, which was kind of strange. I could find out what some of the latest technology is and play around with things I could never afford or in most cases even want. There were all kinds of shiny, mostly useless items available these days, pandered even more the closer we got to the holidays. Here, you can use this item to show off your social status or buy the love of your children. Don’t feel like parenting? Just plop Jr. in front of the latest video game console and your problems are solved. It’s like magic! Since I knew things ‘more’ like magic did exist, whenever random things were compared it magic it always made me laugh a little. Pulling a weapon out of thin air was magic, not getting your child to sit in one place for several hours. I do think that video games have their place, for sure, however it’s one of those everything in moderation situations. Humans are bad at that, they want all of what they want, and they want it all right now. They don’t want to have to regulate how much of something they are getting.  
The door chimed, I looked up and slunk back in my seat a little. ‘Shit, shit, shit, shit.’ What was Daisy Johnson doing here? Did she know I was still active in New York? Someone must have told her, for her to be anywhere near where I was. It could have been Elle, since she showed up now, just after the two of us reconnected. I looked at the paper in front of me again remembering something, the headline was about earthquakes and banks, and a person called Quake. ‘Oh. That made sense.’ That probably meant my secret was still safe with her. That was a bonus, but what the hell was she doing attracting so much attention to herself? She had talked to me about her Secret Warriors plans, I told her I wasn’t interested and that I wouldn’t meet with her group of people to get cleared for it regardless. She had accepted my decision and left. I looked closer at her, she didn’t look so good. She looked like she had been pushing herself too hard. She spotted me and dropped into the booth next to my table. Facing away from me was standard stealth work. She knew I would be able to hear the slightest whisper she made.  
“I need a place to crash. Under the radar, no cops, no SHIELD, no-one.”  
“Done, follow me.”  
“I’ll stick to a loose follow. I don’t want any trouble, for either of us.”  
I nodded and casually slid out of my chair, shoving it back under the table with my foot. I didn’t take a direct path to my apartment, instead doing a slight meander to see if anyone had tailed her. We were clear. I led her through the building, up the stairs and to my place. I sat a glass of water in front of her with some painkillers and some vitamins.  
“Here, you look like shit.”  
“Thanks.”  
“I don’t want to know what you’re up to, but you can crash here as long as you need. Bedroom window faces the river, it’s the best route for a clear escape. I’ll be gone the rest of the morning shopping. I’ll bring some food home at lunch or you can raid the leftovers in the fridge. Here’s a key as well. Do with it what you want, if you decide to leave it here just know that the bedroom window is never locked so I have a way in if I can’t come in the front.”  
Daisy nodded, she looked thankful that I wasn’t going to press for details.  
“I’m still not a hero.” I added.  
She smiled at me, “Me either, I’m just keeping a promise.”  
“Noted. There’s a small hospitals worth of first aid in the bathroom, patch yourself up. It’s no-where near as high tech as that SHIELD stuff you had given me, but it works fine in a pinch.”  
I left her there with the intent of continuing about my plans for the day. I really needed to pay more attention to the news. I had no idea what Daisy was up to and why. She was a little banged up, so she was still active with something though it didn’t appear to be sanctioned like what she was doing the last time we met. It seemed she wasn’t with SHIELD right now, which was strange. After all she had been through with them I had pegged her for a lifer, for her to walk away meant that something major had happened. Maybe there wasn’t even a SHIELD anymore. I knew that it had been working in the shadows for a while now, public opinion was still highly negative after that whole HYDRA thing. There were still too many things being taken care of for them to be completely gone. I would wait and see if she wanted to talk later. If she didn’t that was fine too. We had an understanding, which was why she hadn’t handed my file in, even to Director Coulson. If he was even still the director. Man, I was way out of the loop as far as those agencies went. It did mean that I was doing a good job at avoiding them, but it also meant that I had no idea what the current dangers were and there was always some kind of danger. I’m convinced the world couldn’t exist without some pending crisis. It’s a know your enemy kind of thing, not that they are my enemy per se, but intel was intel.  
I decided on a basic laptop and moved on to a Cajun food truck for some gumbo and hush puppies, it was close by and would make for a faster transaction than having to go to one of the little shops. I got two boxes loaded with food to go. If Daisy was still at my apartment I’d feed her, if she wasn’t it was just more food for me. I saw absolutely no downside to this. I knew the amount of food I was carrying wouldn’t tip anyone off either, the people in the neighborhood had already become accustomed to the large amounts of food I came home with regularly. It seemed stranger to them when I didn’t have extra food in my hands as I made my way home. They liked to joke that I had empty legs, where else could I be putting all that food. An increased and ever-changing metabolism was just something I had to deal with. Keeping myself fed could get expensive if I didn’t have places I got discounted or free food at. Because of this I could safely carry food for anyone stashed in my apartment without even getting a second glance cast in my direction.  
I came home to an empty apartment, a stack of cash with a note with the words ‘for housekeeping’ on it, funny Daisy, real funny. There was also a very high tech looking cell phone on the table. I guessed that I had just become one of her contacts again. I could deal with that. I had known her briefly as Skye, back when she was with Miles and the Rising Tide. I had provided her with information and a place to stay whenever she needed it. She didn’t know about my abilities back then, to her I was just a crafty woman with a comfy couch that was a reliable resource. I had always felt she was different, so it wasn’t a surprise to me when she let herself get picked up by Coulson and the subsequent discovery of her birthright. During this visit she had depleted a few of my medical supplies, which I would have to replace, but she clearly meant for me to be able to do so without too much of a fuss with the amount of cash she had left me. I wasn’t even going to ask where it came from, I assumed it was from one of the watchdog caches she had found. I could use more paying houseguests if I thought about it. I had no qualms about being around people that could take care of themselves, and they knew that their presence wasn’t any kind of new danger to me. It was an unspoken agreement in some circles, if you had to run from something tap into the network of powered people. We were usually functioning low on the radar as it was, we could handle any trouble that followed you and we always had fully stocked medical cabinets with a variety of drugs that could be used regardless of your weirdness. I had rebuilt my stock as soon as I had my own place. When I was still drifting it wasn’t worth it to truck all that stuff around, I would just hit the local medical centers if I needed too. It wasn’t like I was going to be taking care of anyone other than me without even a place to live. I guess I should just admit now that I care too much about everyone else to completely be a loner. Daisy and I had that in common.   
Daisy was in and out of my apartment a few times over the next couple weeks, then she said something about following a lead and disappeared for a while. I followed the earthquake trail. It took her to the southwestern states. She’d fit right in down there as a walking fault line. It would be hard to tell what was her and what was nature. Smart move, unless she was chasing someone dangerous, which was likely. Then it wasn’t as smart a move, but still standard practice for her. I was using my new laptop to catch up on all the things I had missed and ignored. It turns out there was a lot of it. It was going to take dedicated effort just to catch up on everything. I quickly tapped into the back channels that used to be so familiar. They would have the best, most current, and most relevant information without me having to dig through a bunch of useless articles about celebrities and such to find the real news. What most standard issue humans felt was news was just filler, fluff, things to keep them occupied and looking away from the things they should really be paying attention to. Climate change, world issues, those were things they needed to know, but didn’t want to hear. It was easier for them to pretend that borders existed and that what was happening elsewhere couldn’t possibly affect them. They were safe, protected by distance. They didn’t understand just how small this world really is.  
My phone chirped. Well the phone Daisy had left me, it chirped. I assumed she left it on purpose. I walked over to the side table and opened the drawer I kept it in.  
I need intel, Ghost Rider, Robbie Reyes, Watchdog movements in LA, Chinatown crew involved, ASAP  
I started digging. If Daisy was asking me, it was serious. I was sure I wasn’t the only contact she still had. I sent her files of everything I found. There was a lot on this Ghost Rider character, it seemed to crop up in a lot of places. Killed, a lot, but it seemed to be a retribution thing. That wasn’t going to sit well with any government agency. They liked to be the ones to sanction the killings. As soon as I started digging on the victims I found a lot of dirt. That was something I could live with, something I had done myself. I wasn’t above helping karma out here and there. Sure, I usually tried to just drop them off at the police station, but that didn’t always work out. Some took short walks off tall buildings. Gravity killed them, not me. Harder was finding information on this Reyes guy, but I sent her all I found on him and his family. Then I dug into the more complex work. Since I had been catching up on the news I had seen more than I wanted too about these watchdogs. I would gladly help Daisy with her self-appointed mission to bring them down.  
I froze as I read, starting at the information piling up on the screen in front of my eyes. This was bad, very bad. It seemed there was someone high up with a lot of money and connections backing them now. I was finding pictures of passports and military grade weapons and armor. I quickly added that information to the file transfer to Daisy. I would need her to confirm what I was seeing. Some was just speculation and there was always hype in the message boards from the watchdogs and the wannabees that you couldn’t always believe to be true without some sort of physical proof. Better to error on the side of caution though with what these maniacs thought of people like Daisy, and people like me. I just hoped she would have time to read it all and make smart decisions before she barged in somewhere and got herself killed. If she confirmed the information to be true, I could amend these links and make sure that others knew what they might be walking into when dealing with the watchdogs themselves. Though thinking about how she had been acting I wouldn’t put it past her to do just that. She was acting like someone with nothing left to lose. I really hoped that she would get herself together before that happened. The world needed people like Daisy Johnson, whether she knew it or not. So, I made a snap decision and added something at the end of my transmission:  
Hey, come out of this alive okay? The world still needs you…  
I got no response, but then I wasn’t expecting one. I could only hope that she read those words and believed them. I certainly had no plans of stepping up to fill her shoes, how could I? Sure, I had abilities, but I wasn’t Daisy, Quake or whatever she was going by these days. I was just me. Just because I could do a few extraordinary things shouldn’t mean that it’s down to me to save the world. Just like it’s not down to just Daisy to save the world. If we try it should be everyone trying. I would have to ask her that when I got the chance, if I got the chance. Why try to save a world that doesn’t try to save itself? Why kill yourself for people who will prosecute you faster than you can explain what happened? Maybe the world didn’t want, or even deserve to be saved? Hell, maybe I just needed a kitten. I didn’t know. I needed to at least go outside and clear my mind. This was all getting way too heavy. Daisy would be okay, she had to be. She would sort through whatever she was dealing with there, if she needed anymore help she knew exactly where to find me. I dropped the phone back in the drawer, signed off, closed my laptop and climbed out the window. Sitting there on the ledge I stared at the river, watching the random things floating on the surface of the water bob and weave as they made their way to the ocean. I focused on smelling the mix of the spices on the breeze from my Asian neighbors cooking, and listened for the tinkling jingle of the harnesses on the carriage horses. By selectively focusing like this I was always able to calm myself down. I let myself feel the draft created by the buildings waft over me, feeling the sun on my face battling the chill in the air. We would have a light dusting of snow soon based on how the air felt. I liked the snow, it created this all-encompassing blanket that hid the little imperfections in whatever it landed on. Sure, that could make it treacherous for the standard humans to walk on, but even that could be amusing if looked at in the right way. Watching people waddle like penguins as to not trip or slip and fall. Snow and ice was the great equalizer, it didn’t matter who you were, if you didn’t watch your step you were going to fall on your ass. That was beautiful. It forced people to slow down a bit, lower their phones to watch their steps and when they did that they could look around better. They could see the beauty of the world for what it was. This huge variety of people, all together, in this city, everyone just trying to live their lives. Everyone relying on everyone else for something whether they realized it or not. Self-sufficiency didn’t happen much in the city, there were very few places to grow your own food, no way to create your own clothes or items without some sort of outside assistance, someone to bring in the raw goods. The whole model of a city required cooperation. That concept is why I know it would be better, easier, to help fix the world if everyone got involved. A single person didn’t mess things up, and a single person wouldn’t be able to fix everything. It would be a group effort.


	3. Chapter 3

It was late, probably just after midnight if I had gaged the traffic patterns correctly. The sky was clear, and the moon was bright enough to be seen even through the city lights, though I couldn’t make out many of the stars. Light pollution was one of the biggest downsides of city life. The combination of light and dark areas made this more fun. The night air was frosty, nipping at my cheeks, and I could see my breath in the moonlight. There was a layer of frost on any surface that had cooled off enough to allow for it. That would make some of the ledges and bricks slick, but I could manage. The hairs that poked out above my face rustled in the breeze. I adjusted my scarf again, tucking in as much hair as possible and to make sure my ears stayed covered. I didn’t want my scarf to fly off or something ridiculous like that. If that happened, it would be the third scarf I had lost in a month. Maybe they weren’t the best choice in head gear for me, but they were so comfy and versatile that I didn’t want to give them up.  
I was crouched on the edge of a building, looking down at the streets below. They seemed empty enough for a bit of exercise, there wasn’t much reason to look up by this building anyway, all the neon signs were across the street. The signs would attract any attention from foot traffic before I would. I flexed my fingers in my lined leather gloves and looked behind me. Still no one, so now would be the time to do this. People occasionally came out on this rooftop to smoke or just to look at the city lights against the night sky. I jumped forward off the ledge, fully extending my body into the leap and judged where I would impact on the building across from mine. The wind pressed against my face, my eyes stinging a little in the cold, I smiled at the sensation. I felt alive, I could feel my muscles ripple and flex as I reached full extension and began to contract for landing. As I came in close I reached out and grabbed the side of the building. The bricks bit into my gloves providing me with a good purchase and I let my arms absorb my momentum as I decided if I should go up or sideways. My feet landed lightly beneath me, toes flexing in my shoes and I divided my weight between my hands and feet. I decided on an upward route and began scaling the building, avoiding any windows that looked like someone might look out of them and see me. This side of the building was in the shadows, so I knew people in the buildings across the way couldn’t see me. I didn’t feel like dealing with people right now, I just wanted to focus on what I was doing. As I moved silently upwards I felt the winds shift, the further up buildings you go, the more interesting the weather patterns created by the alleys and roadways. My scarf and my jacket flapped lightly against me, but my face was close enough to the building that my eyes weren’t watering anymore. That was a bonus. The moon and the streetlights were casting warring shadows at the corner of the building, I moved as one of them, taking a meandering route to the top. I peeked over the ledge to make sure the rooftop was clear, you could never be sure in these neighborhoods, and when I confirmed that it was I pulled myself up to rest on the edge. This was fun, I really should do it more often. I enjoyed the wind in my face, the uptick of my heartbeat and breathing as I moved, the slight sheen of sweat that blossomed across my skin when I really pushed myself. I wasn’t pushing myself hard tonight though, so I hadn’t even increased my heart rate or breathing all that much and with the cool air I was still way off from needing to sweat to cool down. I considered it training, but right now it was mostly recreational, I was just doing a very light workout. It allowed me to clear my head in ways that my focus meditation simply couldn’t. There was just something about physical activity that helped me think. I had kind of made my claim, chosen a neighborhood, but I still wasn’t in a hurry to be a hero of any sort. I wasn’t about to go out looking for a fight. As I sat there looking around I smelled sweat and blood then heard movement. I slipped into the shadows and waited. Someone else was out here climbing buildings. What were the odds? Well, in Hell’s Kitchen they were truthfully reasonably high, but I still hadn’t run into any other powered people that I was aware of up to this point. I might have passed them on the streets, but it’s not like we could identify each other on site. That was Joey’s thing, but thankfully it didn’t seem that common. Whoever it was smelled ‘male’. The protein and hormone mixture in the sweat was usually accurate. I had a high rate of not misgendering people because the way they smelled told me more that looking at them ever could. There was just something different about how each of the genders smelled, and then it varied even within the genders themselves.  
I kept to the shadows and kept silent, waiting for whoever it was to join me on the rooftop. I felt sure that this rooftop was their intended destination, just as it had been mine. The wind was blowing my direction, so I had the advantage as far as scent and some sound was concerned. I was also on the far side of the building from where they were climbing up. That should give me plenty of space to decide what I would need to do. Whoever this was, they were injured, the smell of their blood continued to waft over to me, so it was a fresh injury as well. It would be just my luck to get on the bad side of the first local powered person I met in the neighborhood. I assumed that they would also have no way of knowing if I was friend or foe, and I didn’t feel like fighting a cornered, startled human and realistically speaking, anyone else that would be out here doing what I’m doing around this time of night was likely to not be only human. Standard issue humans generally didn’t silently climb buildings for fun, and the ones that did climb buildings weren’t all that quiet about it. They said it was something called parkour, I think, and they liked to film it. I had restocked my medical supplies and Daisy had sent some of the medications that weren’t available on the standard market, but that didn’t mean I wanted to have to use them on myself. Sure, the medications would help me heal faster if I did get injured, but it still hurt. I had a clear view of a dark hand reaching over the ledge, it didn’t take long for the rest of the person to follow. When he had finished pulling himself up, I realized I was looking at the devil of Hell’s Kitchen. So, I at least knew he was on my side, however I had no way of knowing if he would realize that I was on his. It was then that I made a split-second decision. I took advantage of my ability to move silently and the distance between us to slip back over the edge of the roof, working my way back down the building. Startling someone, especially when they’re already injured, is just asking for an ass kicking, it didn’t matter who you were. We’d either simply meet some other time, or never. Either option was more than acceptable for me. When given the chance, I picked my fights and I picked them by leaving if I could. Two people fighting for the same thing didn’t need to waste time, effort and blood beating the snot out of each other. I didn’t want to bet on him being the kind of person to ask questions first, given that it was reflexes that saved your life more than discussions and reflexes didn’t often allow for enough time to distinguish friend from foe. I would have to reach out to my contacts about him, now that I had seen for myself that he was real, find out anything I could about him. I also knew the smell of his blood and could find him later by that if I chose to, though he had been in disguise, so he probably wouldn’t apricate that type of action. It did seem like he was a talented fighter, there were traces of someone else’s blood on him and he seemed to have scaled the building with nearly the same ease that I had even with whatever injuries he had sustained. I looked around for any bodies, signs of fighting, or blood; seeing none I decided it was time for me to just head home. He didn’t seem like he needed any help and I had worked myself enough for the night, my body felt strong and toned, I didn’t want to push myself if I didn’t have too. I had just been out for a stretch anyway. I wasn’t sure what his abilities were, but I felt confident he either hadn’t had the chance to notice me, didn’t realize I was human if he had, or felt he didn’t need to follow me. From experience I know that I get dismissed as a stray cat more often than I care to admit.

I was less concerned about running into The Avengers, I had seen their tower being emptied and heard talk that they were moving to a facility somewhere up state. Though I had still seen Ironman active in the city on occasion, he seemed to be distracted with something else. Some Arachnid-kid, Bug-boy, Spider-boy? I wasn’t sure, I’d heard conflicting rumors on that front. How many locally operating powered people did New York have policing its neighborhoods anyway? I needed a drink. I knew there were a lot of us out there, I guess I just didn’t realize how many would step forward for their fellow citizens. It was kind of heartwarming and nauseating at the same time. Some of these people were just kids. Kids risking their lives because the adults can’t get their shit together enough to not try to rob and kill each other. I decided that a drink was necessary and headed for a bar. The closest one was called Luke’s. Good enough for me, I went inside. It was early for drinking, so it was nearly empty. I got a mixed drink from the guy behind the bar and took over a corner booth. It seemed like a nice enough place. I absently stirred my drink as I wondered what it would be like at night when it was busy. If it stayed reasonably quiet I might have found my new bar. It was comfortably close to home and seemed a decent enough size to not get people packed in it like sardines. Based on what I was overhearing the guy behind the bar was Luke. Guess that either made this his bar or he decided it would be funny to work somewhere with his name on the sign. Either one could be just as likely. He kept it clean and poured the drinks strong. That was enough for me. The whole situation with that Spider-whatever just didn’t sit right with me, kids being left to solve all the world’s problems. That whole ideology of someone else will fix it is what got us all into this mess. I finished my drink in one gulp and got up to leave. I nearly bumped into a dark-haired woman as I left. She looked like she was having a worse day than I was. I could easily smell the whisky on her, and that didn’t take any special abilities to do. She must be drinking to cope with something. That’s the reason most turn to alcohol. I just shrugged and made my way back to my apartment. I had enough people time today. I needed to be my myself for a while. The world was crazy, and I needed to decide what my place in it was. It was probably time for a trip out of the city. That might help with my mood. For now, I think I’ll settle for a detour through Central Park. It was nowhere near on the way home, but I needed some nature time and that was the closest I was going to get without extra planning.  
I found an area free of people and took my shoes and socks off. I didn’t care that it was cold, I just needed to feel the earth under me. I walked in random patterns, just breathing and letting my mind clear. I listened to the wind blowing through what was left of the leaves on the trees and rustling the branches. The leaves on the ground blew a little and added to the ambiance if the moment. I didn’t really live with that much technology, but sometimes it was still nice and necessary to make the effort to unplug. Get away from everyone as best I could and just reset.

It wasn’t nearly long enough before my peace gained from the trip to the park was broken and damn near my nose too.   
I reeled back, out of striking range, though the stinging in my nose told me that he had already landed a solid blow. It wouldn’t bruise, but it was going to hurt for a while. I dropped low, avoiding his next swipe, he didn’t seem to be all that good at fighting and that first strike must have been lucky. He hadn’t expected me to fight back. The alley we were in was dark, it was a moonless night and that also put him at a disadvantage. I could see. I knew that for the most part, he couldn’t. I caught his legs with mine and brought him down to the pavement, his head made a sick thud noise as it hit. Guess he had never been taught how to fall either. Totally not my problem. He had been lurking at the edge of the darkness and grabbed me as I walked home. No doubt expecting easy prey. I wiped the back of my hand across my face, it came back bloody. I rolled my eyes and grabbed his now limp body and drug him to the side. It wouldn’t be far to carry him to the police station, or I could just tie him up and dump him out in the light and let fate sort him out. A patrol might be by soon. I heard feet land behind me. I stiffened a little, ready for another fight, but then the new guy spoke. Very un-bad-guy like.  
“I thought you might need help, but I guess I was wrong.”  
“He got unlucky” I replied, turning to face the owner of the scent I’d remembered from that night on the building.  
He stood for a moment, seemingly regarding me, though I could see that there were no eye holes in his mask. He was blind. It clearly didn’t stop him.  
“Have we met before? You seem familiar.”  
“In passing.” I replied simply.  
He seemed to think on that for a while more, then decide on something.  
“I’m just going to leave him here, unless you want to do something with him?”  
“The police will find him.” Then he was gone, I was alone in the alley again.   
Well, even once alone again with the idiot that tried attacking me. I still wasn’t sure what to make of the devil of Hell’s Kitchen. On the other hand, he also didn’t seem to know what to make of me. At least we were even there. My research had shown me that he didn’t kill the guys he fought, just beat the shit out of them and let the cops sort it out. Based on that he must have some code against killing. He also appeared to be a skilled fighter, though he clearly could still be injured. He had to have some extra sensory abilities to move around so well with being blind. I was now leaning more towards him having some idea that he wasn’t alone on that rooftop that night, though I moved fast enough that he was unable to do anything about it. He also seemed either too polite or too cautious to bring it up now. Whether that was because he still had some deciding to do, or because he had made up his mind that I was accepted in his neighborhood I wasn’t sure about. I hoped he would decide that he didn’t mind me being here. I liked my apartment and didn’t want to have to go through the effort involved with finding a new one and moving. It seemed like the world was small and only getting smaller. There were powered people everywhere. Hopefully there would be enough of us to make a positive difference. Though I did have to admit that it only took one, one of us could make a positive difference to a small group of people and sometimes that was enough. Maybe it wasn’t about saving the whole world, just a small part of it. Pieces solving the puzzle, as Daisy used to say. She was big on that whole one person with a part of the solution thing and I think I’m starting to understand what she meant by that. I smiled to myself and tied the guy up. He could wait here for the cops to find him. I’d drop an anonymous call to the station when I got home. I guess I should start carrying that phone that Daisy gave me in my pocket or something. I was a part of the world again, better start living in it. Still not a hero though.

Water dripped somewhere. The incessant tapping brought me to consciousness. My head was pounding. My eyelids were heavy and felt sticky. My whole body hurt, I could feel where my shoulder and hip were pressed into the concrete. I wiggled my fingers, then my toes. All seemed functional and whole. I rolled onto my back to release the pressure on my joints and held back a groan. If I didn’t know where I was I didn’t want to make too much noise. I felt like I could hear more than I should. My heartbeat mixed with sounds from the building, water in the pipes, the creaking of the floors above me. Everything hurt, but I felt strong. It was strange. I couldn’t remember what I had been doing, how I got here. There wasn’t anyone to wonder where I was, I had been parentless for a few years now. My friends might wonder though. Those were things I knew, I wasn’t sure why I knew them. Anything else about my life was all a blank. I tried to figure out what time of day it was, but there were no windows I could see from my vantage point of the floor. I mustered the strength to sit up, the room I was in was bare, paint and wall paper peeling from the concrete and wood walls. Everything was so loud. Why was everything so loud and how could I see so well in this room. It had just dawned on me that there were no windows, no sources of light and I could see fine. It must be pitch black in here. I sat there for a long time just trying to sort out my senses. It could be equated to being born again, having the world suddenly rush in on you and your brain had to make sense of everything it’s receiving. The ache in my body had started to fade and I gradually worked my way up the wall until I was standing. I looked myself over for any signs of trauma. I was uninjured as far as I could tell. I was wearing some sort of combat gear, bracers and various other protective pieces fashioned out of leather and metal. Who I was and where I was I had no idea about.  
The room was empty, save for me. I tried to make heads or tails of the sounds around me to know if I was alone or not. The noises I heard just sounded like an old building, so I moved towards the door. My feet were silent as I crept along, trying to understand everything I was seeing, hearing, feeling. It felt like the world was in 4D. I was terrified, and at the same time I knew I wanted out of where ever I was and the best way to do that was remain as calm as possible and just work my way through whatever was in front of me. Being street savvy had gotten me out of bad situations before my instinct told me. I was counting on it working this time too. I would sort out all these extra things once I knew I was safe.  
Something fell outside the door and it may as well have been an explosion to my ears. I reflexively clapped my hands to my head, but my ears were already ringing. I stopped to give myself some time to cope. There were too many sources of feedback, I hadn’t noticed anything before the boom. I tried to focus on my breathing to see if I could work out what had happened. I noticed then that the wind had picked up outside. So maybe I was lucky, and I was still alone. That didn’t seem likely, but I couldn’t make out any other noises. The ringing in my ears was slowly fading. I pressed myself against the wall next to the door and tried to listen like normal. That was my first mistake. The world went a little sideways with the influx of sounds. It was like that shock you get when you climb in a car and everything is silent until you turn the radio on and realize you had it at max volume the last time you listened to it. I slid back down the wall as I struggled with internal volume control. I didn’t understand why, but this was clearly something I could do. I could hear a ridiculous amount of sounds and I could see in the dark. What the hell happened to me? I tried to do selective listening, that worked better. The area around me still seemed empty of humans, though I could hear some small noises that might have been bugs or animals. This was way weird. I pulled myself back up and slowly peeked out the door. There was a pile of lumber laying in the hallway. I realized that had the door not opened into the room, I might have been trapped and I shivered. That it was laying on the floor could probably explain the noise, it didn’t look like it had been in that position long, all the dust was on it as if it still leaned against the wall. I looked around more. I barely registered that the hallway was dark, but I did note that it was clear of people. The window at the end showed me a starry night sky. Ugh. What time was it? How much time had I lost? I tried to remember anything, but came up blank. I carefully picked my way across the fallen lumber and down the hall. The window looked out onto an open courtyard that was in as clear a state of disrepair as the rest of the building. I didn’t see signs of life anywhere or hear anything. It didn’t look that far to the ground, so I tried the window. It was a bit jammed with age and paint, but I was able to slide it open and I looked out again before dropping to the ground with more grace than I remember having. I was going to need to talk to someone about all of this. This was just plain creepy. I searched the horizon for signs of light that could indicate a city, found some and headed that way. The area around the outside of the building was as deserted as the interior had been. I couldn’t see or hear any sign of people being here with me. I wasn’t sure if that made me feel better, or worse.  
I twitched as I woke up. I had a knot in my neck and I was sore all over, like I had fallen down an entire flight of stairs. I always woke up in pain after dreaming about the abandoned building and the day I discovered my abilities. It was kind of like the day I was born if I thought about it. The light on the horizon had been New York. I quickly got to know some people there, so I just crashed with them until I found my feet. As soon as I was able I started researching super human abilities, find out what people knew, what they had heard, and I had started experimenting with different training types to find out what all I was capable of. It resulted in more than a few accidents, but I always found a way to patch myself up and I’d start again the next day. I gradually built up a network of human and non-human contacts and this has been my life ever since. I never dug into that building though, and I never quite found out what happened to me. It just wasn’t something I cared to look at. I’m sure I would one day, just not now. I didn’t need to look backwards. There was plenty to do in the here and now. I had some testing done, and I wasn’t Inhuman, but beyond that the lab I had gone to was stumped. So, I just left it at that. If I tried to dig deeper, it would only result in a bigger paper trail for someone to find. I wasn’t ready to find whatever friends and life I had left behind, and it didn’t seem like they were looking for me either. So, no loss.  
I got up and stretched, grabbed my foam roller and went to work on the kinks left in my body from the dream. I didn’t consider it a nightmare, it didn’t scare me, but it certainly put my body through the wringer whenever it came back. I checked myself over for bruises, there shouldn’t be any, but anything that hurts that much should leave a mark, it’s only fair. Then I took a hot shower to work the rest of the tension out of my muscles and my mind. I still remember how much I struggled with all the extra senses those first few months. Even sound proof rooms weren’t always sound proof enough for me to focus and clear my head. They did muffle the noises, which was a plus, but I wouldn’t want to go back to those days for anything. I had found solace in nature most of the time. Animals were still noisy, to be sure, but there was a soothing pattern to most of it. That was my escape. My body and mind had adapted well to the changes, but it had taken time and patience. Now I only got migraines occasionally from overstimulation if I tried to focus too hard on something that was too far away. I did still get them occasionally, just because brains and bodies are fun that way, but anything I could do to lessen them was a bonus. With great power comes a whole bunch of side effects that they never bring up in the comics. I guess it just wouldn’t be as fun to read about a super hero that needed to take a day off to lay in a dark quiet room because their extra sensory perception had messed with their brain chemistry enough to cause them a skull splitting migraine. I used to think puberty was bad. Coming into abilities, powers, whatever, that was way worse. There also wasn’t a publicly known support system for it. Parents and teens had accepted science to explain what they were going through, I can’t exactly go to a regular doctor for treatment without risking a mental institution at best or being a lab rat at worst. There were networks, but they were hard to find and in some cases harder to get into. There was some concern about being discovered by the wrong types of people. It was strange the amount that I just “knew” about my life prior to waking up alone, yet I didn’t really know anything. It was more like instinct, like something I had watched in a movie somewhere often enough that I just committed it to memory like it was my own. I had no way of knowing the difference after all.  
I needed some predictable people time. That usually helped when everything seemed to go off kilter like this. I tapped on the pane of glass in the window of Elle’s living room. My warm finger tips left little circles in the frost and I tapped out a smiley face simply because I could. I heard Elle’s soft footsteps, only slightly muffled by the rich thick carpet she had installed recently. She pulled the curtain aside to look at what was making the noise and smiled at me, then giggled at the frosty smiley face. She unlocked the window and I slid it open and climbed in.  
“You couldn’t just come up the stairs like normal people, could you?”  
“I’m not normal people Elle.”  
“Fair enough.”  
“I brought the movie, but you’re in charge of snacks. I didn’t want to risk crushing them in my pocket or something weird.”  
I pulled my shoes off when I was halfway through the window. I wasn’t sure what was on the bottoms of my shoes and I didn’t want to mush something into the carpet. I had just come up the buildings from the alley after all. Plus, I loved the lush feel of the fibers on my feet. What is the point in having heightened senses if you don’t use them to enjoy the little things in life? I carried my shoes over to the cubby by the door and dropped them in an empty square. I hung my coat on the hook above it and pulled the movie I brought out of the inside pocket. I held it up for Elle to see. She nodded her acceptance and turned to grab us some snacks. We cuddled under one of her fluffiest blankets on the couch and just watched the movie and ate. It was a nice night. I had missed these moments when Elle was out of town, after that I was drifting from place to place and didn’t have a steady cuddle buddy. They can be hard to come by, finding someone who respects boundaries and can separate the need for human touch from anything sexual. Not saying that Elle and I had never done anything together, that just wasn’t what most of our relationship was built on. She was free to see other people, so was I, but regardless of what she was doing I was always able to count on her for a cuddle break. The same applied to her, I would be available for cuddles no matter who I was seeing. All of this was established before either of us got serious with someone else, if they didn’t like it then we moved on. We didn’t feel like it was that much of a compromise. I firmly recommend everyone have at least one cuddle buddy. We snuggled down deep into the blankets on the couch and just picked a random show to watch after the movie was over and the snacks were gone. I knew that we both felt our safest like this, like we were protected from the world. Elle was one of the reasons I had never sought out life somewhere other than New York, even when she had left I knew she would come back. It had been the constant in both our adult lives. We could talk about everything and nothing. Whatever we needed right then.   
I woke up well before the earliest morning light crossed the horizon, carefully extracting myself from our nest and making sure that the covers went back around Elle. I put the movie away and cleaned up the evidence of our snacks and quietly left out the window I had come in through. Elle was used to waking up alone after our movie nights, it was hard for me to stay in one place too long, even if I had my own apartment, I was always out doing something. I decided to building hop for a short distance before coming down in an alley where I wouldn’t attract much attention. I needed coffee and possibly breakfast something fierce. I probably could have left through the hallway and took the stairs, but I was comfortable with this route. I also wouldn’t have to worry about locking the door behind me. The odds of anyone else climbing the side of her building and finding that one open window would be low. I had chosen the side without the fire escape to stand on as my favorite window to visit. I stepped out of the alley into the first rays of sunlight. There was something beautiful and serene about sunrise.  
I felt something squish beneath my shoe, looking down I realized I had stepped off the curb directly into day old take-out. Oh yuck, seriously? I did my best to clear the gunk out of my shoe with a combination of scraping and foot wiggling as I headed to the bakery on the corner closest to Elle’s apartment. Then, with coffee in hand for the safety of mankind I headed off to meet Daisy. It was completely out of the blue that she had contacted me with this. We had been in touch off and on, trading information as we found it. She wanted to talk to me about something she said was important, something about SHIELD falling, again, ‘could they ever keep their shit together?’ and them needing all the people they could get that she could trust. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to hear her out. I could always tell her no again, but she seemed desperate this time. Even when she had come to me during her brief stent away from SHIELD she hadn’t been this desperate. Determined, sure, she was always determined, but this was a different ballgame. I needed to know what all the stakes were. I refused to make any decisions without having all the facts available to me. It was a given that I’d likely never have them all, but I wanted to be sure I had all the ones I could. This was going to be a big choice, as a fringe person I had been able to avoid signing the Accords, but if I completely jumped into an agency, all bets were off. It would probably be the first thing I had to do. At minimum they would want to do some form of classification thing, I was sure of it. Powered people didn’t just join groups anymore, not without someone sticking their nose in. I guessed I could try to seek out the group of Avengers that had broken off, but I might have to scrap some of my life here to do so. Whatever I decided I wanted it to least effect the way things currently were. That was probably a longshot, something that I wouldn’t be able to do, but I had to try. I had just sorted so much out, I had just reclaimed so much. I didn’t want to have to lose it all again. I sucked in a breath. I’d just have to face whatever it was, then decide from there. Just like I did with everything else. This flying through life by the seat of my pants thing was getting old and it was hard on the pants.


	4. Chapter 4

Daisy was at the café she had found me at, but she wasn’t alone. There was a man with her. He was older, but seemed fit. There was also something off about him. I focused. Ah, he had a robotic hand. Daisy nodded at me, I stared hard at her for a minute before coming around to sit at the table with them. It was then that I recognized the man. It was Coulson. I nodded to him and took a seat. I wasn’t as concerned about the fact that she’d brought someone now. For whatever reason, I trusted Coulson. Maybe because he’d been shanked by an alien and still stayed in this line of work. That takes something else. I knew he would be unflappable by this point. I also knew how he had handled everything with Daisy and felt confident that if I decided to walk on this, he’d let me just like she would. Yet, the fact that she wasn’t alone meant that it really was bad. They were counting on the team effort explanation. Anything that required that was bad news. I was a little behind myself, I had let my news tracking slip in the past few weeks. Sure, it was probably a bad idea, and had I been paying attention I might now be here now, but I had no excuses. I would just face the music. It’s not like they were here to bring me in by force. I’d have seen that from a mile away and they knew it.   
So, what I gathered from the meeting was that SHIELD was struggling again. Coulson wasn’t the director right now, he had stepped down for when it had become public again. Boy, I really hadn’t been paying attention. Naturally it wasn’t world news that Coulson had survived, and so he stepped down. It probably would have worked out, but I’m not about to judge the mans’ life choices. I was informed that they still didn’t have a file on me, which was nice. However, I was given an open invitation to join. I don’t know how high up the chain of command that came from, they seemed more than willing to just make it so and work through whatever happened. No wonder we got along well. They seemed to use my same philosophy. Though I’m sure they had lawyers and such to back it up, mine just came down to me and whatever band of mischief makers I had been running with when the shit hit the fan. Some things were easier to do solo, some really worked out better with a team. But having a team meant having some level of trust and there was the inherent flaw. Getting larger and larger groups of people to aspire to a common goal is hard. It takes good leadership and then even within the best groups there will be subgroups that have their own agendas just waiting for the opportune moment. Have I said that I’m jaded yet? Because I am. Very, very jaded.  
The lobby of the building was empty, well almost empty. There was a cat stretched out on the floor in a beam of sunlight. The contrast between the light and the dark in the room made it look like a black and white painting, dust particles floating lazily in the beam, the cat looked as if he was on stage at the opera. The light drumming of its heart told me it was sound asleep. Lucky cat. I would give almost anything to be that comfortable right now. I however was here to tell Elle that I was leaving. That I didn’t know when I would be back, or if I would even be coming back. I didn’t know what was going to happen, I just knew that if I didn’t do something to help Daisy I would never forgive myself. I felt sure that the world could be in danger and that SHIELD was on the front lines of helping to keep it safe. So, maybe I am a bit of a hero. I wasn’t just going to sit there and do nothing, I couldn’t. I took a steadying breath as I walked the last few feet to the door of Elle’s apartment. I could tell from the familiar footfalls that she was home, she wasn’t alone though. I reached my hand up to knock. It would be so easy to just leave, not say anything, or just leave a note. The coward’s way out, it was such a shiny prospect, but I couldn’t do that anymore than I could stay. So, I knocked. Elle must have known I was leaving by the way I approached the apartment and the look on my face because she went from smiling at me to looking concerned.  
“Something has happened. What is it?”  
“I can’t tell you, but I have to go. It’s one of those greater good things.”  
“Okay….” She threw her arms around me. I hugged her back. “See, I knew you were a hero.”  
“I’m not, but thanks anyway. Listen, I don’t know what’s going to happen from here, I don’t know when I will be back, I don’t know when I’ll be able to contact you.”  
“I know the drill.”  
“I’ll miss you. Be safe.”  
“I will miss you too and I will, be careful okay?”  
“I always am.”  
She called me a liar, but she was smiling all the way to her eyes. Yet, I didn’t look back as I walked back down the stairs. I couldn’t. We always knew that one of these departures could be the last. Even if we never said it.  
I walked with Daisy and Coulson as we climbed the stairs to the top of a parking garage. The only sounds echoing in the concrete building were birdcalls. The pair of agents with me had switched completely into mission mode, they were moving silently and had determined looks on their faces. I was listening to everything as we walked, but picked up no sounds of danger. We appeared to be in the clear. The roof access door opened onto the large flat expanse of the garage, it was empty of cars, but I could make out a place along the horizon that wasn’t quite right. I stopped and looked at Daisy and pointed at it.  
“Quinjet, cloaked?”  
“That’s so not fair.” Coulson nearly whined. “How the heck can she see it?”  
“I can only see that it’s not right, if that makes you feel better.” I could hear and smell it too, but I decided not to mention that. Quinjets taste funny, by the way.  
“Slightly.” He replied.  
The jet was decloaked and we walked up to the back ramp to board. We were met by a tall, dark-haired, light-eyed, fire hydrant of a man. K SMITH was what his nametapes read. His gaze was intense, but I met it without flinching. He looked intrigued by this. I’m guessing he was used to being imposing, even among SHEILD agents.  
“Grey, this is our newest asset. She will be working for SHIELD for the time being.” Grey reached out his hand as he was introduced, and I shook it. His hands were warm and his grip solid. I matched his grip with one of my own. This guy was going to be fun to break if he wanted to match strengths.  
“K Smith?” I was feeling nosey. What a fake ass last name is Smith anyway.  
“Legal name. You haven’t been here long enough to know it.” He replied, his tone final.  
“That’s fair. I’m sure we won’t be seeing much of each other anyway.”  
“Probably not. I’m switching from just being a pilot to a field agent full time. You’ll probably be safely tucked away in a room on base somewhere consulting or whatnot.” He was so confident it neared arrogance. It was half annoying, half endearing. I kinda wanted to punch him in his smug face.  
I don’t know that two people have ever been more wrong.

The shit hit the fan fast, which really shouldn’t have surprised me. I knew what I was getting into. I also knew I wouldn’t just be consulting, though that had been the initial plan. I would consult and train people. Less paperwork if I didn’t see field time. Like that was going to stick.  
There was a tuna sandwich sitting on a plate on the table. I reached out to it with my senses. It was still eating temperature, merely a few degrees warmer than fresh out of the fridge. Whoever had been here hadn’t been gone long. They didn’t even have time to take a bite of it. Grey picked it up, looked at it and before I could comment on how nasty that was he had already wolfed it down. I guess that should be expected from someone who so closely identifies with dogs. I just shook my head and kept moving. We needed to clear this building so that the rest could move in and I needed to check for intel. I sniffed the air and listened, closing my eyes. The building was quiet save for the hum of electronics. I could smell blood. I followed the sound of the electronics. Any bodies that we found would have to be sorted out later, they weren’t the priority here. I needed to locate those computers and input the chip that Daisy sent with me. Hopefully our visit was enough of a surprise that they didn’t have the time to wipe anything off the hard drives. We could get it back, but the faster we got this done the better. If they had deleted the files we would have to take the gear back with us. That would be heavy and awkward. The lighter our packs, the better. I looked around the computer room when I tracked it down. This stuff was high tech for watchdogs, but since they had gotten some sort of well financed backer that wasn’t necessarily a rule we could follow anymore. Just about any possibility needed to be out in the open and considered. We needed to know what the next target was and how they were getting inside information. We felt sure we didn’t have an interior leak from a base, but since dozens of inhumans were being tracked and monitored it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch for them to have hacked a tracker on one of them and back fed the data stream into the mainframe. The tech that had been issued to them was supposed to be unhackable, but advancements were always being made. I found and exploited loop-holes all the time myself, so it wasn’t that big of a stretch for me to think that someone had simply done the same with the SHIELD hardware. They weren’t invincible, and they had to know that, they had to accept that there was no way to completely lock down a system that had that many things on it. This was a technology based arms race and only one side was being forced to play by the rules. That’s why I was here. This needed stopped, and soon. It was like open season. For the time being we had to suspend as much of the tracking as we could, and we still had to be sneaky about that since the government always wanted the inhumans to be tracked, which was a total invasion of privacy. They couldn’t even take the damn watches off to shower. I had narrowly avoided a tracker myself, being able to lie my way around the intake exam with the help of the team. Daisy said they needed someone who would still be able to play outside the agencies reach if they hoped to get ahead and I fully agreed with them. I was the woman for the job. There were plenty of ‘rules’ that I had no issue working my way around and being put on an international watchlist was something I strove to avoid.  
The auxiliary team was sent in to clean up the bodies, there were some victims and more than a few watchdogs. It looked like they had grabbed someone that they couldn’t handle just before we showed up. We must have inadvertently provided the captives cover for an escape. That was a bonus, anyone that wasn’t on the registry that was rescued from missions like this was quickly processed, so I had no issue with them making their own way back out and to any medical help they might need. Nothing good ever came from putting a bunch of names, locations, and other vital information on a singular list. Sure, the claim was that it would only be accessible by the participating governments, but that never lasted. S.H.I.E.L.D. itself had learned the negative consequences of lists with the index. It was all too easy for sensitive information to fall into the wrong hands and not everyone on those lists was able to defend themselves, especially when approached by an organized group bent on genocide like the watchdogs. We managed to pull the mission off without a hitch and left for the base.  
Grey was in the training room when I walked in. I waived to him as I walked over to where he was leaning up against the wall. This man could take up space wherever he wanted. He was tall, and he somehow managed be a combination of lean smooth muscle that rippled like waves under his skin as he moved and solid bulk that told you he could take a hit at the same time. Not quite as chiseled as a dedicated body builder, but it was clear that he worked out regularly. He wasn’t some lumbering behemoth, but he wasn’t a twig either. His eyes were the color of cold steel and he studied me from under full dark lashes. He had fair skin, and except for a handful of scars scattered across his body, he was blemish free. It was like he was photoshopped. Even the scars he did have just added to his regal look. His dark hair was fine-textured and stuck up in every direction on the top. He somehow always managed to be clean shaven, which just showed off aristocratic looking cheekbones. Sometimes when I was in the same room as him, I watched him, looking for any sign of a flaw. I never found one. Bastard.  
“I need a sparring partner, you game?”  
“Sure, if you’re up to getting your ass kicked.” He jerked his chin up as he spoke, making a point of looking me up and down. He plastered a nearly convincing sneer on his face as he looked down his nose at me.  
“You wish Grey.”  
The good-natured banter had become part of our normal routine. We would insult each other, beat the crap out of each other, nearly always end in a draw, then go grab a drink afterwards. We circled, threw kicks, punches and jabs, both of us working as hard as we could to parry the others blows and turn the tide of the fight. It was comfortable, and I had made friends here, but I still missed New York and Elle. I absently wondered if she would be any good as a sparring partner as I took advantage of an opening and flipped Grey onto his back on the mat. A grunt escaped his lips as his body connected fully. He cussed and rolled to his side to get up and retaliate. I didn’t give him the chance. As soon as he started to get his legs underneath him, I knocked them back out. This time he landed on his stomach and I jumped on his back and twisted his arm around, pinning him to the ground. We both were breathing hard and covered in sweat, but I managed to keep my grip on him as he squirmed.  
“Do you want to lose a little face, or your arm. Totally your choice.” I breathed in his ear  
“Alight, I yield, I yield!”  
I stood up, pulling him back around to face me and let go of his arm, but I offered him a hand up. He accepted it, and promptly pulled me on the floor beside him.  
“Should have seen that coming.”  
“I did, but I figured I earned it. You know, threatening your arm and such.”  
“Yeah, you did.”  
We helped each other up and I walked over to the shelves and tossed him a towel. He caught it out of the air and we both wiped off the worst of the sweat from the workout. I could take a shower later. I threw my towel in the bin next to the door and turned as Grey tapped my shoulder to get my attention.  
“Drinks?” He offered.  
“Drinks.” I agreed.  
I followed his loose and lanky walk to the lounge, we were a study in contrasts. He was effective enough on his feet, having developed a loose moving grace to match his larger frame, but he was never going to be as fast as me. It made us an interesting pair to watch in the ring, I knew that for sure, he had me beat for height and weight and I had him outmatched with my fluid movements. It was like cats and dogs. I was all lean muscle and whip like reflexes to his bulk and smash routine. We were fast friends though and having discovered that we could pair up in a fight and leave no openings in each-others defenses he was one of my favorite agents to get sent out on two-person missions with.   
Fun and games can only last so long. Missions started to pick up and while training on my own I discovered, or rediscovered? I’m never sure, the ability to summon things at will. I happened totally by accident, I had taken a break from base to train in a remote part of the woods. It should have been safe, but I managed to stumble on a rather large force of unknown origin. Just that they weren’t happy to see me. I somehow pulled daggers from thin air to defend myself. Useful, sure, but way more obvious than most of my other abilities. This one would need to be used carefully.  
CLICK. Nothing. The gun was jammed. Damn it. This was exactly why I didn’t use them. Ok, it was far from the only reason, but I didn’t have time to get into that mental rant right now. I was a little busy and a stuck gun was the last thing I needed. I threw the now paperweight gun at the oncoming watchdogs. I caught the lead guy in the face with it. At least my aim with random objects was still solid. I jumped up and back to get behind some crates, flipping my wrists mid-air to summon a pair of daggers. I threw both at the same time, hitting their marks perfectly just before I dropped behind the crate. Daisy joined me, and we glanced over each other for any real damage before jumping back out into the fray. Neither one of us were worse for wear, yet. We had been the first pair to come in. This was beginning to look like it was a bigger hideout than our intel had indicated. We might be a bit outgunned. For that to happen to a team with us on it was saying something. We were both formidable fighters, but as I have said before, being outnumbered vastly skews the odds. We beeped for the rest of the agents on our team to join us inside. I heard the movement behind me and ducked, the butt of a gun sailed across where my head had been. Sparring at SHIELD had improved my reflexes even more than I figured it would. I should have been sparring with competent partners this whole time and I would be leagues ahead of where I am now. I whipped my body around, planting my foot square in his chest. Why didn’t he try shooting me, surely that would have been a better option than coming in for hand to hand combat. I beeped my comms again.  
“I think they’re aiming to take prisoners, they seem intent on hand to hand combat. Watch your six and team up when you can.”  
“Noted.”  
“Understood.”  
Several others called back in with various forms of acknowledgement. The element of surprise was gone. I was glad it was me that they tried first, because we mostly had standard humans with us as our backup. Daisy and I were the only ones with power and would be harder to take, but we didn’t want anyone to fall in their hands. These guys had firepower, but they seemed reluctant to use it. I had every plan of using that reluctance against them. Close combat was where I excelled at anyway and that was before I had been wailing on, and getting wailed on, by elite class agents. Of course, being confident is good, being cocky is not. I might have been just a touch cocky when I didn’t notice the extra couple guys in the room I went into. I had only been expecting the two and hadn’t noticed the side door. I would pay for that mistake. I felt and heard both bones in my left arm crack upon impact with the concrete pillar. With my focus trained on the pair of watchdogs the other two shoved a large rolling shelving unit into me, knocking me sideways. White-hot pain shot up my arm and I did my best to cradle it to my body as I worked myself away from their trap and back to where I knew there were more agents. We splintered off into pairs and cleared the rest of the building, managing to keep them from taking any people and preventing most of them from escaping as well. Back in the Quinjet I hissed and pulled my bracers off. If I hadn’t been wearing them this would have been so much worse. As it was my arm looked like a little kid’s watercolor project. The colors bloomed in patches all over my skin in the pattern of the leather, it had clearly spread most of the impact out. I was glad it wasn’t a compound break, that would have sidelined me for even longer than this would. Healing factor aside, broken bones still hurt, and bruises took time to go away. The rare times someone did manage to bruise me I was going to wear those colors for the normal human amount of time, if not a little longer. As we were moving into the Zephyr I pulled on a regular t-shirt. My mission clothes were nasty, I dropped them and my armor into my bag. Daisy winced as she saw my arm from where she had plopped into a seat and got up to grab the medical kit. She helped me wrap it and put a light air cast over the wrap and then I was passed a familiar white pill bottle by one of the medical techs on board. Well, that certainly explained a lot. These had been a staple in my healing kit for a while now. Fortunately, until I came here I never had to use them on myself, I had watched what they could do for others though and knew about the science behind them. Maybe Daisy was a bad influence on me. That was a laugh. We probably tied where that was concerned.  
“So that’s where you got these” I whispered to her as we turned to go back to our seats.  
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Daisy smiled back at me. “I didn’t take them, Yoyo got them for me. How was I to know where she was getting them?”  
“Plausible deniability. I see.”  
I gave her a pained grin and swallowed the pills. These were going to be my friends for a while. I was likely to get fussed over when we got back to base, but I could tell this break was going to heal just fine without a professional touch. Not that I would get out of an exam anyway, they were serious about their medical care. We would be done with this outing for now anyway, so rest and doctor visits could be done without hindering any progress. That was the last of a group of buildings we were clearing. From here it was back to base to rest, restock, and refuel. It was still going to be several hours before we landed though, and I got up from my seat and made my way over to one of the bunks. I healed better when I slept. I had every intent of grabbing a nap on the way back to base. However, intent isn’t everything, in some cases, it means absolutely nothing at all.   
I just laid there, listening to the various noises that signaled all the parts working to keep the Zephyr in the air and fully functional. It was a chorus of beeps, clicks and the constant electrical hum. On top of that the other agents were doing whatever they did to unwind as well, which for some wasn’t so quiet. Drinking and talking, nursing whatever injuries they got, some played video games, others took out extra energy on the punching bags. I couldn’t blame them, it wasn’t their fault my hearing was so keen, and this plane was only so large, the walls only so thick. Even the steady stream of air rushing by was loud to me. I had used too much energy in the fight to really be able to draw into myself and ignore everything effectively. Summoning weapons and healing could really take it out of a person and I was out of practice with the weapon summoning. I hadn’t needed to do that in a long time. I needed to start carrying some daggers on me again, and find somewhere private that I could practice. Letting those ‘muscles’ get mushy wasn’t going to do me any good. I was just going to have to deal with all the noise. Even if I couldn’t achieve real sleep, just laying here immobile and relaxing for the trip would help. I reached up and grabbed the earphones that Daisy had given me when I accepted field work, and put on some music. That’s how I passed the time until we landed. I tried to avoid the lab, I really did. But I was grabbed as I tried to sneak away and drug in to see the experts. My wrap and cast were deemed efficient enough after much complaining from me, and I was given a light duty order and instructed to take a handful of various pills every few hours for the next few days. I had told a select few about my healing factor, they were able to have this information via the handy doctor patient clause that even extended into SHIELD somehow. I would thank whoever for that one when I could. I still didn’t want the higher up agents knowing what I was. It would just complicate things. They hadn’t liked it, but I hadn’t given them much of an option on anyway, so it wasn’t much of a secret for them to keep. I felt they needed to know certain things, if they were going to insist on treating me. There were just some things you didn’t keep from your doctor if you wanted them to be able to help you to the best of their ability.  
I stretched out flat on my back, just letting myself float in the warm water. The extra jets had kicked off several minutes ago, but the gentle circulation and hot water was nice enough. It was also quieter without the jets on. I stretched my fingers and flexed my wrist. My joints popped with the motion, but everything seemed to function how it should. My arm still hurt right where the break was, but it was healing well and fast. Between my natural healing factor and the medications that I was taking I didn’t need to wear a full cast. That would have also prevented any of this relaxing swimming. I had taken the wrap and air cast we had applied on the Zephyr off so that I could get into the water fully. I would put it back on when I got out, mostly as a precaution. I usually just opted for wrapping breaks anyway, unless there is bone separation, then it would need a bit more medical supervision. This had been a clean break, and I had been fussed over enough already. I knew I had broken various things over the years and not even realized it at the time, it just hadn’t been important. If my body was still functional, I used it, simple as that. The bruise pattern that had formed along the arm was beautiful. Since it was going to be that way for a few more days I may as well learn to apricate it. I had gotten spoiled, all those years of not actually getting injured. I slowly raised and lowered my arm in the water, feeling the bubbles collect and break against my skin. I rolled in place to look over to the side, Daisy had propped herself up at the edge of the hot tub and was dozing, her legs just dangling in the water. It had been a good outing, we were breaking supply lines everywhere. She was also looking a lot better. She seemed to be coming to terms with everything that had happened before she came looking for me in New York. She had apparently learned the same thing I had, that you can’t completely cut yourself off from everyone, because not everyone will let you cut them off. They will still care about you and check in on you. It was both irritating and touching at the same time. I reached my foot over and bumped hers to wake her up. There was no way she was going to be comfortable sleeping there. We hadn’t slept in proper beds for weeks and I knew that she was just as sore, if not more so, than I was from the ordeal. I knew I healed faster than her, and thus could handle the abuse a little better.  
Daisy opened one eye to look at me after the third tap of my foot against hers.   
“Mmmhmmm?”  
“You can’t sleep there.”  
“I think I am though.”  
“Go to bed Daisy. I’ll see you bright and early to start again in the morning. I need you all fresh faced and rested. And by bright and early, I mean like noon.”  
Daisy looked like she might argue with me for all of a second, then she just shrugged and pulled herself up and headed down to the bedrooms. She knew I was right, even if she didn’t want to admit it.  
I floated there for a while longer, just letting myself enjoy the heat of the water. I was trying to decide if I should eat first, then sleep, or just try to sleep. My stomach growled. Oh, who was I kidding. I pulled myself out of the water and headed for the kitchen. There was always time for food before sleeping. It wasn’t that late, but we had been gone for days and that messes up your entire rhythm. I dug through the cabinets and ended up grabbing some unlabeled leftovers out of the fridge before I meandered off to the room I was given with them in hand. Whoever they belonged to would just have to realize if it wasn’t labeled it was fair game with me here. They could fight me about it if they wanted. The agents that had been on the plane with us had figured out quickly how much I needed to eat to be happy and they would pack light little snacks everywhere. Not that I didn’t do the same, but it amused me to see them ready to offer me food any time I began to get agitated about something. I think it had become a game to them. You needed fun things like that on missions though, they broke up the waiting and lightened the mood. There was a bag of dried blueberries taped to my door when I got back to my room. I smiled, pulled them down and opened the door. I missed my apartment sometimes, listening to the dog upstairs play with the squeaky toy, but this room wasn’t uncomfortable. It didn’t even feel institutional, or military issue, so that was a bonus. It was just a room. It would have been nice to have a window, but I was willing to deal with the lack of one for the extra sound barrier they had built into the walls. It helped to muffle all the noises standard to an active base. I still needed to decide on a paint color and add my own decorations, but I was putting it off as a sign that I hadn’t committed to staying yet. I was still bouncing between the base and New York as often as I could. I had made it clear that I still had a life off base and I wanted to have access to that. It hadn’t been easy, but they had needed my help that badly, and the team that brought me in had vouched for my character to the boss. They could trust me to not sell them out. Hell, I probably had clearer morals than the groups in charge of agencies like this one.


	5. Chapter 5

The bruising on my arm had started to fade. The bone was mended, the area around it no longer tender. There was just something about my body that it took longer to clear up the signs of the injury than to heal the actual damage. It all still happened faster than what was considered normal, but it still was something I wondered about. If I could heal things so quickly and so well, why didn’t bruises fade faster? Soon there would be no sign that anything had happened. I had learned from my mistake though, and had suggested we introduce surprise group attacks into our sparring sessions. Everyone had agreed it was a good idea, since we were running into situations like the last mission more and more often. It seemed that the watchdogs now had their eye on taking any captives they could, Inhuman or not. The director was starting to ask questions about what I was though and, so I was still wearing my brace on my arm. I could keep up appearances easy enough. I felt sure that he knew something was different about me and was just waiting for me to tell him myself, but he was going to be waiting a while for that to happen if I could manage it long enough. I still wasn’t entirely sure about the entirety my background, so how to explain it to others was always a task I tried to avoid. I still had no memory of my life before waking up in that building, still had found no leads on myself. Who I was before, where I was from, all of that was unknown to me. It was probably about time that I really dug into that myself, to finally learn my past, but I also wasn’t in a hurry to do that either. I had been content to just exist this whole time, that was the easy thing to do. Not go poking around, not risk digging up anything painful.  
“There you are.” Daisy walked up to me in the training room. “Director wants to see you.”  
“Should I be worried?”  
“I don’t know, but do whatever you need to do, don’t worry about us.”  
“Several of you vouched for me though”  
“Yeah, he will get over it, whatever happens.”  
I took a breath and walked towards the stairs. Guess it was time to face the music. I wasn’t sure what else he would want to talk to me about aside from my healing and powers. I had no way to know what the other agents might have told him. There were several that I had been on missions with that could have seen something, and some might feel it’s their duty to report whatever it is they see. That whole, see something, say something mentality. It’s not like I’m HYDRA or something, but I guess they are in the right ultimately. They don’t know me and thus I could be perceived as a threat.   
I stopped outside the door of the director’s office. It was closed, and I could hear movement inside, but none of the people were talking. I wasn’t going to get any kind of preview that way it seemed. That kind of luck is standard for me though and I just accepted it as it was. I reached out and tapped on the door lightly. Chairs scraped, three people inside, I noted. I was met at the door by the director, Phil Coulson and Jemma Simmons. I dipped my head at Phil, then turned for introductions. I had seen Jemma in the lab, she’d helped with some of my medical stuff before. She might even be the one that figured out I wasn’t strictly human. She’s certainly brilliant enough to have put the pieces together. I also hadn’t exactly been formally introduced to the director. He was a good-looking man, he seemed vaguely familiar to me. Maybe I had seen him giving SHIELD briefings or something on the news.  
“Jefferey Mace,” He offered, extending a hand. “We haven’t been formally introduced yet. You know Phil Coulson,” he indicated in Phil’s direction as I nodded, “and this is Dr. Jemma Simmons. You’ve probably seen her in the lab.”  
“I have.” I shook hands with Mace, then Jemma. “To what do I owe the pleasure of the face-to-face?”  
“We just need to talk, please come in.”  
I looked to Coulson for any kind of guidance, he just shrugged at me and followed Mace through the open door. I held out my hand to indicate that Jemma should go next and I followed her in, closing the door behind me. Anything I had to stay in here I wanted to say behind closed doors. Hopefully I was the only one on the base with the ridiculously good hearing. I didn’t need the whole world knowing about me.  
“I’ve been getting some concerning reports from agents in the field with you.”  
“I see, what do you plan to do about it?”  
“Well, that depends on you.”  
“I’m not the enemy here Director.”  
“We’re not saying you are” Simmons jumped in.  
“You’ve been completely vouched for.” Coulson added, looking pointedly at Mace.  
“That’s all great, but I can’t have someone on my team that should be acting under the Accords who hasn’t signed them.”  
“I won’t sign them, I’m not even sure they apply to me.”  
“And why is that?” Coulson asked, confused.  
“Because I don’t even know what I am.”  
I was met with silence and stares. I let myself lock eyes with Jemma. “I’d be willing to let you try to find out, but I am not going to be some kind of lab rat.”  
“We’ll get started in the morning then, if that’s okay, Director?”  
“Fine by me, but I don’t like how this is going to look.”  
“I’m sure you can make it look however you want it to,” I said meeting his gaze. I wouldn’t be the first to flinch and look away, though it wouldn’t have been noticeable to anyone else in the room with us. I trusted and liked him well enough, but some things about him just didn’t track. I knew I wasn’t the only one here keeping secrets. It was easy enough to hide my abilities working in a group, but anything too small and I would stick out like a sore thumb. Mace could hide behind his title.

I flicked both my wrists out, summoning a pair of daggers. I had gotten a lot quicker and smoother with the motion. I twirled my body as I sent them into the hanging bags that served as my targets. I was moving on a diagonal line, rolling in the larger spaces to speed up and stretch my body out. The movement was soothing, and I needed to keep up my dagger practice anyway. Both with aim and with summoning. I was glad that I had decided to start actively summoning weapons again. It was more of that odd familiarity that I both liked and was so scared of. Now that I was doing it all the time, it’s like I had never stopped. I quickly learned that it was easier to summon things if it was done more often. It also made my battle packs lighter, to not have to pack a bunch of daggers into the field with me. It wasn’t always practical to physically retrieve them after we were done fighting also, so being able to just summon them back to me was the most efficient way to work. I needed to start practicing doing the same with my armor, but the larger the item the more energy it took to summon, and it was harder to hide what I was doing. Summoning was just like using any other type of energy, whether it was physical or mental. The more you used it, the better and faster you got. It was easy enough to make it look like whatever daggers I pulled were just hidden on my body somewhere. It would be harder to convince people that I had done the same with the larger body armor pieces. I had found a small, out of the way room to practice my summoning in, the video monitoring equipment just didn’t stay on line in this room, no matter how many times they fixed it. The room was just large enough for me to set up several bags as targets, set up in a line so that I could move between them at varying speeds to mimic battle conditions. Any gun practice I wanted to do could be done at the range, but this was my private dagger room. No audience, no surveillance, just me and cold hard metal. I’m sure that there were places in the actual practice rooms that I could do my dagger work, but having my own space was nice. I was unlikely to get interrupted in this room, whereas there were people in and out of the training rooms at all hours. It was a communal space, after all. Everyone needed to keep up on their training. I would train here for a while, then I would go out and join them for some sparring. The combined training was working well for me. I was beginning to feel like a whole new person. Yet at the same time it felt like coming home, like this is who I was. It was strange, but I liked it.

I leaned out slightly and launched a dagger from behind the door jam. The dull thud and sharp exhale of breath told me it had hit the mark. I nodded to the agent across from me and they panned the room with their gun to make sure the way was clear. When we were sure there were no more targets inside I raised my hand in one smooth motion, sending the squad in. I moved in behind them, neatly bringing up the rear with my partner for this mission. This was our first time working together. I preferred working with Daisy, but this agent could hold her own in the training room, so I had accepted the swap. The nametag on her chest read PIPER and her short spiky hair peeked out from beneath her tactical gear, it looked dark brown. I knew that at least one of the agents in front of us was Davis, but the rest were new to me. We were always getting fresh faces in, people were always willing to step up and put their lives on the line for what they believed in. It was an admirable, if foolish trait that seemed to be common in humans. I signaled to Piper that I had heard motion in the hall next to us and she beeped the comms to alert the rest of the team. They all moved into sheltered positions as I leaned up against the wall to do a more direct listen, then I nodded to Piper and rolled back out of the way. She raised a rather normal looking gun and squeezed the trigger. The gun fired off a pulse wave that tore a hole in the wall where I had been. There was sudden commotion and shouting from the hall and I dove through the hole with the group of agents quickly following me. The agents were firing off Icer rounds as I threw out daggers. I was mostly aiming to immobilize, but I was authorized to kill also. There would still be enough people to question. When the motion stopped there were unconscious watchdogs on the floor and a handful tacked to the walls with carefully placed daggers.  
“If you don’t move too much, you’ll be fine” I told one of the watchdogs, whom I had tacked to the wall and silenced with an extra dagger between his legs. It was south of anything that mattered, so long as he didn’t struggle and loosen the daggers holding his shoulders against the wall. It had been a warning shot, after all. He glared at me, but stopped struggling. The team quickly moved to round up the group and we made our way back out of the building and to the jet. Hopefully the guys that were knocked out would be able to give us some information when they woke up, but it was hard to say which ones would be willing to talk and which ones would just spew hatred at anyone who questioned them. The ignorance was nauseating, and these guys had just lapped it up. I never understood hating someone just because they were different. It’s always seemed like an ignorant waste of energy to me. Whether these guys would provide good intel or not was to be seen. Either way, we were effective pest control. That was for sure.

I had no idea how I got suckered into this. Ok, maybe I did, and it was a stupid dare. Either way, I was the most harmless looking of the group I was with so I guessed it would just have to be me. I leaned up against the railing on the pier, looking out over the water. It was a calm day; the waves were gentle, and the breeze was light. The smell of the salt in the air was refreshing after the length of the trip to get down here. Being in the warm sun was another bonus, it’s not that I didn’t like the cold, but we had done several missions in places I swear were sub-arctic and I was completely over that whole snowy mountain aesthetic. I had a leg cocked up with the toe of my shoe resting on the ground and I did my best to look concerned and a little lost. I kept looking at the phone in my hand and making fretting motions.  
“Oy, look fellas, we got us a damsel in distress over here.”  
I rolled my eyes, but didn’t turn to face the speaker. I had to look the part. I hated being the distraction, but I had drawn the short straw today.  
“You lost pretty lady? We can help ya, we don’t bite. Promise.”  
He just wasn’t going to give up, was he? I put on an innocent face and turned. I needed to look non-threatening for as long as possible. Everyone had to be in place before I made my move.  
“Yes, I just can’t seem to find any signal out here,” I held up a dummy phone. “Can I borrow your phone to make a call? I was supposed to meet a friend, but I seem to have come to the wrong place.”  
“Sure sugar, anything for a pretty little damsel.” The guys behind him sniggered. I stiffed my spine as the beep sounded in my ear right as he reached forward with his phone.  
“Damsel I might be,” I said firmly, “but I’m far from distressed.” I grabbed his outstretched wrist and used his confusion to yank him to the ground. “NOW!”  
The team repelled in and surrounded the small group of guys. Everything had happened so fast they had no time to react. That’s exactly what we were aiming for when we set this mission up. Now that my woman in the wrong place act over, Grey tossed my field kit at me. I grabbed it out of the air and put my gear on over the basic workout clothes I had been wearing. I felt much better as I finished buckling my bracers on. A tank top and shorts might be great to run in, but it left way too much skin exposed for any actual fighting. I liked to have something between my skin and the ground if I had to drop down for any reason. Road rash was not my friend, leather, synthetics and metal were. I still wasn’t comfortable summoning everything I needed in front of the group, so I had packed a bag and sent it in with Grey. I knew he would have my back if anything went down and he had come through perfectly. It seemed like no matter how many guys we brought in there were hundreds more just like them, out there causing trouble. We had to find out where they were recruiting from because we were always several steps behind them. This was getting old, fast.  
When I got back to base I met up with Daisy. She had been out with other teams and we needed to compare notes. It had become routine for us to gather intel on missions, then meet up and go over what we had found so far. We were covering the most ground this way and making good advances in our knowledge. She had seen evidence for herself that part of the recruiting pool was done in prisons. That would explain a lot, these guys had no issue doing any of the things they were told to. She was pulling me from watchdog duty after today though, she said there was something else happening that was bigger than them. Knowing how she felt about them told me all I needed to know about the size of the threat we were facing. It was going to be huge and probably going to get messy. My days of simple bad guys were behind me it seemed. It was fun while it lasted I guess.

I stretched my arms over my head and tried to work the kink out of my neck. I had been in one position for too long and was starting to get stiff. I never should have let them talk me into watching them play games. There was some type of online marathon thing they were doing with the Xbox and for whatever reason they wanted an audience, said it looked better on the screen if there was a bunch of people in the room. Whatever, I could play placeholder well enough. Several of us were stretched out in whatever chairs were available in the lounge while another group of agents took turns with the controllers. I do have to admit, it was amusing to watch the different playing styles and the reactions when they would win or lose battles. The game they were playing was being streamed online for charity, with donations to the charity ‘unlocking’ the next game in the line-up. It seemed that we had an active group watching, because as they finished the first game there was always enough of a donation made to switch to the next. Some of us in the audience were sneakily pitching in, just to see how long we could get them to stay awake for. It might be a tad sadistic, but it was for a good cause. It was nice just to exist. Not be worried about the next corner.  
I looked around the room at the agents I had shed blood and sweat with. I turned and stretched my legs over Grey, who was right next to me on the couch. He huffed dramatically and gave me a side eye, but he was barely hiding a grin. For a big burly guy, he was a softie. It was amusing how often that happened with these tactical gear wearing baddies.  
“I need to stretch, you want to get some drinks?”  
“Aren’t you already stretching?” He motioned to my legs across his lap.  
“Yeah, but walking is better.”  
“Fair” He replied simply, and I moved to stand up before he could brush me off onto the floor.  
I nodded at the agents working in the lab as we walked by, Jemma and the agent I think is Fitz waived at me.  
“Give me a second.”  
Grey stopped walking and nodded. I walked into the lab over to the scientists. They had been running tests on me for a while now. Ever since I agreed to let Jemma try to sort out how I was able to do what I could do. I had no problem with her bringing Fitz in on it and I knew that the samples were blind tested by everyone else in the lab. We were trying to handle this as discretely as possible.  
“We’re still running tests, but you don’t have Inhuman markers. We’ll keep looking.”  
“Yup, knew that. That was one of the first tests run on me. Thanks for double checking though, I’m sure advancements have been made here that aren’t available elsewhere yet.”  
Jemma smiled at me. I smiled at them both and walked back out to Grey in the hallway.  
“What was all that about. Did something else happen when you broke your arm?”  
“I don’t know yet.”  
“Okay.” Grey shrugged. “Don’t tell me then.”  
“There’s nothing to tell yet. I’m fine, they’re just running some tests for science or whatever.”  
Grey looked at me for a bit, then just nodded, and we continued our walk to the lounge. I didn’t realize he was worried about me, but I guess it’s only natural to want to make sure someone you go into battle with is in good shape. I would probably worry too if I saw him going into the med bay as often as I had been over the past few weeks. He knew my arm was fine, since I was back on missions, but he must have wondered what else had happened to me out there. It was nice to be with a group of people that cared about my wellbeing. I was used to having such a small circle of people that it was still something I was adjusting to. I kept forgetting that under his big rough exterior Grey was a marshmallow, he cared about the people that he worked with. He smiled and raised a hand in acknowledgement of another large guy and a smaller Hispanic woman as we walked. I waived at them too, there were still so many people here I had not been introduced to.  
“Hey, that’s right, you don’t know Mack and Yoyo, uh Elena.”  
“There’s a lot of people here I don’t know.”  
“Yeah, you’re like some big secret or something that the Director has.” Mack commented as he looked me over.  
“I’ve just been really busy, that’s all.”  
I shook hands with them, Elena was Inhuman. That much I knew. It seemed like Mack might be as much of a tough looking marshmallow as Grey. There were some interesting people here at SHIELD. There wasn’t much I could do about the semi-encouraged quarantine I was in. To an extent I still agreed with it. Limiting the number of agents that I worked with and was in direct contact with had its strategical advantages, the less people we had to explain things to the better. Especially while the testing was still being done. That didn’t seem to stop them from sending me on missions, but those were all classified anyway, so I guess they were curbing their chances.  
We poured ourselves a couple of drinks and took over a corner table facing the room and the hallway. We sat in silence, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable one. We just sat there, people watching. I listened to the normal hum of the sounds of the base, the sounds of people going about their days, doing whatever jobs they were here to do. Granted there weren’t as many people to watch here as a bar or café off base, but it was still a satisfying way to relax. We took our time sipping and just sitting there until the drinks were finished, and we traded the booze for hot chocolate. Agents really didn’t do any major drinking this early in the week. There was nothing to stop us, but we all knew how much fun it was to go on mission with a drunk or someone hungover, none. Though our jobs didn’t exactly conform to any set schedule, we all still tried to live by one. We were needed where we were needed when we were needed. It didn’t matter day or time. The world never called ahead to plan out an emergency and make sure people would be available. Unless we specifically asked for time off we were always on call and even time off wasn’t necessarily sacred. It was a hard way to live if you had a family, so most of us didn’t. Sure, there were some with parents, bothers, and sisters, but very few people tried to pursue any personal relationships beyond that. Most of us weren’t even in contact with the rest of our families anymore. It made things easier.   
Being married to the job is what people would call it, I believe. Though marriage implies that there should be equal effort on both sides, and there is no way that a job can do that. No matter what the benefits are. I was really starting to miss my cuddle buddy. I found myself again thinking of Elle. I wasn’t sure who here could fill that role for me. Sure, I could get limited physical contact through sparring, but that wasn’t exactly the best way to go about it. I eyed Grey as he sat across the table from me, he seemed like he was lost in thought as well. It’s possible that he might be up for something like that, but I would have to decide how to approach it. I liked him well enough and he kept himself clean. Yet, going back to that whole dog and cat dynamic we had, I didn’t want to make things complicated. It was hard to know what his reaction would be if I asked him. There was no way that I was going to try any sort of online dating thing. That was just looking for trouble. I could see about some time off, but that was unlikely. I also didn’t just want to pop in to see Elle for a quick cuddle then have to leave town again. That just didn’t feel right. No, I would have to find a way to work this out here, on base and my own way. Grey certainly didn’t seem to mind my lack of personal space when sitting on the couch in the lounge. So, there was hope yet.

Stupid missions and their stupid risks. I was cursing to myself continually while I maneuvered my way through the cargo. Grey was leaning heavily into my arms as I half carried, half drug him off the jet. He was rapidly losing what strength he had left. He was bigger than me, that was for sure, but his weight wasn’t really a concern for me. I would have fully carried him, but we were back on base and I didn’t want to raise too much suspicion. I would be able to get him to help quick enough without compromising myself. We didn’t have far to go now. He was still grumbling, so he was conscious. That was always a good sign. His clothes were ruined though. They had been shredded and were soaked through. They really should have everyone wear armor like I do. It should be standard issue. SHEILD gear is amazing, but it’s got nothing on my special-order stuff. I might have to bring that up to someone I mused. It can be made to blend in with the tactical outfits they already wear. I adjusted my arm under his shoulder and continued dragging him further into the base. The hallways were empty with it being so early and I had told our pilot that I could get him to medical just fine on my own. I looked around one more time before I picked him up to carry him the last few steps. There was no one there to see, save for the surveillance cameras. I didn’t care who saw what on tape. Anyone viewing that would already know about me. I looked behind us again. Someone was going to have to clean up that blood trail. The floor of the Quinjet was a mess. There was just so much blood.  
“Oh no, are you two okay?” Jemma wheeled a gurney up to where I was carrying Grey in from the hanger.  
“Yeah, we’re fine, just fine. I just enjoy getting stabbed and bleeding. It’s fun.” He quipped.  
‘Well, he’s still being a little shit, so he’s probably going to be fine.’ I thought, mildly amused.  
Jemma first glanced over Grey. She then turned her attention to me, concern clearly showing on her face. I looked down at myself. I was covered in blood. Most of it was dried already, but some of it was still fresh and glistening. The air around us was filled with the metallic smell of it.  
“It’s mostly his. He is a bleeder. I got the worst of the bleeding stopped, but not before wearing some of it.”  
“Yeah well, just because you’re you don’t mean you wouldn’t bleed if someone stabbed you.”  
“I’m sure that’s true, but they would have to catch me first. Can we please just focus on getting you patched up?” I turned to Jemma. “He’s lost a lot of blood, I’m amazed he is still awake.”  
“Yes, lets.” Jemma agreed firmly.  
Grey finally stopped arguing with us long enough for me to get him on the bed and we rolled him into the lab. Jemma was shouting orders to the personnel that were on duty. He had only been out of my sight for a few minutes when he got ambushed. It easily could have been me sitting here bleeding, since we had flipped a coin to choose the hallways we would go down. Jemma and I quickly stripped him of his clothes, paying little attention to his attempted protests, to see how badly he was injured. Nothing looked all that deep, but he had long jagged cuts in several places that would need cleaned and stitched. No wonder he had bled so much. His injuries were more a surface area thing than a depth thing, but in my experience shallow cuts bleed more. These were meant to hurt, meant to make him bleed. I fought the urge to clench my fists as I forced myself to focus on cleaning the cuts nearest to me. Jemma did the same. The techs handed us numbing shots, needles and thread. I could have let someone else stitch him up, but I was tired, sore and covered in his blood. I needed something to do. Everyone knew better than to argue with me and I had proven a few times that I knew my way around injury care. I could get cleaned up after I knew he was going to be okay, he was my responsibility and he had gotten hurt on my watch. He was my partner. This was on me. This was my fault. How could I have been so stupid. I know to energy sweep places before we go in. Goddess, this is one I’d mull over for a long time.  
“Okay, now I need to look you over too. Just in case.” Jemma’s voice cut smoothly through my thoughts.  
I moved to the side of the room on autopilot and stripped down to my base layers. I shoved my bloody armor and clothes into a bag that was held out for me, then I sat down on the chair next to the bed while Jemma and another tech treated a few injuries I hadn’t noticed that I had gotten. So not all the blood was his. Oops. I just had a few gashes and scrapes where my armor didn’t cover on my neck and my face and a few light bruises where it did. Those cuts could have been bad if they had managed to do more than clip me and it looked like a few of the blows to my body could have been more serious as well if they had made it through the material. ‘See, armor was a good thing.’   
Grey was laying on the bed with his eyes closed now, I’m sure the drugs they had given him kicked in. He looked like shit. Bruises, cuts and scrapes were spread over his whole body. I got up and threw a blanket over him. He opened his eyes and smiled at me, then he noticed the scrapes I was sporting and frowned. His keen eyes kept dropping to the cut on my neck. The fresh stitches there told him how deep it had still been by the time we got back to base. It didn’t take someone with a medical degree to know how close they had gotten, and I knew that Grey had a handful of degrees in a variety of subjects. Why was he even a field agent? He could easily be back here at base where it was safe putting his brains to use. Big dumb genius and his damn desire to make a difference. You can make a difference in a lab. I know he'd say the same to me if I aired that last bit.  
“I’m fine, these are minor compared to yours. You’re all sliced up and you look like my punching bag.”  
“I feel like your punching bag. Aren’t you cold though?” He weakly lifted a hand, motioning it towards my body. “It’s freezing in here.”  
I followed his gaze, I was still just in a sports bra and cutoff leggings. There were patches of dried blood where it had seeped through my clothes. I looked like a leopard, with various spots that had been cleaned to be checked for injury to the skin under the blood. I knew this room was kept cold, but I couldn’t feel it. I had never been very susceptible to cold temperatures when I got worked up. I could feel it, sure, it just didn’t strike me as being that cold. I was vaguely aware that, that wasn’t normal, but I didn’t usually have to worry about anyone aside from myself, so it was easy to forget about.  
“Nah, after carrying your fat ass in I needed to cool off. Besides you bled all-over my clothes.”  
“Sorry and thanks.” He whispered as he closed his eyes again. “Thanks for saving me.”  
“Anytime. I know that you would do the same for me.”   
I squeezed his hand and left him there to rest while I went to wash up. I dropped my gear off in my room and grabbed a change of clothes. I would clean my armor later. I threw the clothes that I had been wearing under my armor next to the trash can. They might be ruined, or they might not. I didn’t feel like looking at them right now. I caught another agent on my way to the showers and I gave them the mission brief to pass along, I told them I couldn’t do it myself because I needed to wash myself and my gear. They accepted that explanation without question.   
He really had lost quite a lot of blood, it would have been better if we had been based out of the Zephyr for that mission instead of just a Quinjet. Then his wounds could have been tended to better as soon as we got back to the jet. There was only a basic first aid kit in the Quinjet we had been in and it clearly hadn’t been restocked properly after the last mission it was used on. There wasn’t much that could be done about that now though and we both ultimately made it out alive. That’s what mattered when push came to shove. We would both heal and aside from the injuries the mission had been a success. We got what we went in after.   
The water that cascaded off my body looked like scene from a horror movie. I stood there under the spray until the water ran clear. As I washed I lightly touched the stitches that had been put in the cut on my neck and the one on my cheek. As soon as I had lost contact with Grey on comms I had grabbed what I needed from the control room to complete the mission and ran back to the hall he had gone down. There was a group of people around him, taking turns slashing at him with knives and I just saw red. I don’t know how they got the drop on him, and right then I didn’t care. They were so distracted with torturing him they didn’t even have a chance to see me coming. None of them would be doing any talking now. I clenched my hands so hard that my nails dug into my palms and it snapped be back to the present. I shut off the water and toweled off. I needed to go down to the training room, and beat the shit out of something. I should have had him wait back in the jet. I had known it was a job that could be done by one person, but I had gotten so used to having back-up that I had gotten lazy and started relying on it. Now my friend was hurt, because of me. I felt so stupid. I felt so helpless. I changed into the workout clothes I had brought to the shower with me and stepped out into the hallway.  
Daisy surprised me at the door.  
“You did nothing wrong.”  
“So, you say. But how could anyone go on missions with me now. I almost got my partner killed.”  
Phil walked up to stand by Daisy and added. “No, you saved your partner. Risks like this are part of the job both of you signed up for.”  
It was clear to me that Jemma had sent them. I must look like as much of a mess as I was feeling. I just stared at them. I never wanted to sign up for this. I never wanted someone else to be at risk because of me. I kept myself apart from everyone for years to avoid this very thing. I opened my mouth to say as much. Then closed it. I just needed to take a break from everything. Before I said or did something that I was going to regret.  
“If you’ll excuse me, I need to go break something.”  
“Just as long as it isn’t yourself.” Daisy said to my retreating back as I stalked away from them. “The world needs people like us, remember. You taught me that.”  
Damn her. Using my own words against me. But deep down, I knew they were right. I knew she was right just as I knew that I was right when I send those words to her all those months ago. It was just getting myself to fully believe that all the time that was the struggle, it was so easy to fall into the trap of blaming myself for the things that happened to those around me. So, I taped my hands and started letting the nearest punching bag take all my stress away.  
I don’t know how long I wailed on that bag. A few other agents came and went as the base started to wake up for the day. They must have heard the news because they gave me a respectful amount of space and left me to handle my demons in my own way. Daisy and Phil came to check on me a few times, they made it look casual, but I could tell they were in the room to watch me for any signs that they needed to restrain me. When I finally started getting tired I decided I should drop back into medical before I went to my room. Grey was sitting up and was starting to look more human, more like himself, so I sat with him for a while. It didn’t take long before he was too tired to sit up and I helped him lay back down. I sat back in the chair next to the bed and promptly fell asleep. No one bothered us, the techs came and went as silently as possible to check on Grey, but they mostly just let us sleep. We had taken enough steps when setting him up that he could easily be monitored from a distance. That allowed him some privacy, since there wasn’t a need to be constantly checking and changing bandages.


	6. Chapter 6

That cycle repeated for a couple days, with me sleeping as much as he did, apparently, I was exhausted too. Finally, Grey was awake more than he was asleep. That was the final clue I needed that he was going to be fine and we had prevented any infections. I started to go about my normal routine again, just dropping in occasionally to see if he was going crazy from bedrest yet. It didn’t take long for that to happen to people who are used to very active lifestyles. I brought him updates on things as often as I could and tried to make sure he always had something to do. I taught him how to crochet, something I had found useful for when I was going to be stuck in a single place for a long period of time. It was adorable to see this large muscular man carefully working away with this delicate crochet needle as he made progress on the various things he was making. A small pile of scarfs and headbands was building up next to the bed. Boredom made for a very efficient and productive assembly line. At the end of the days when I sat with him I would work on my crochet projects too. We had Jemma package up the items we had made and send them out to shelters and charities.  
I was very happy when it was time to remove the stitches from the cuts I had received. They had started to get itchy and it took every ounce of my self-control to not give in and scratch at them. Grey was jealous of how fast I had healed, but he was one of the people that knew about my healing factor, so it wasn’t a surprise to him. He was just grumpy that he was still going to be on light duty for a long time while he healed from all the injuries he had gotten. He was healing well though, we had been able to prevent most of the cuts from scarring too badly. Not that Grey minded, he said it made him look tough. I told him that his muscles and general size did that well enough. That made him laugh. I would be working with another partner while he healed. Since my stitches were out I was cleared to go on missions again. It would be good to get off base for a while, even if I was back on partner rotation like I was when I got here. At least there were several agents that I liked to work with that I could be sent out with.

It was early afternoon, but I had the rest of night off. I hadn’t decided what I was going to do with my free time yet. I flopped down on Daisy’s bed next to her and sighed. I was finally feeling better about myself. Grey and I had talked, and he flat out refused to listen to any of my ideas about how he should have stayed behind while I went into the building alone. He had told me no questions allowed that I was being stupid. He had told me it wasn’t my fault enough that I was starting to believe it.  
“You were right. I was right.”  
“Uh-huh.” She waited for me to continue.  
“Grey is going to be fine, and shit happens. It wasn’t my fault.”  
“You trying to convince me, or yourself still.”  
“Myself mostly.”  
Daisy gave me a quick, but strong hug.  
“Jemma and I are going out for drinks tonight, you should join us.”  
“You think that’s a good idea? I don’t want to mess up your plans.”  
“Of course, it’s a good idea. She’s your friend too you know.” Daisy rolled her eyes like this was the most obvious thing in the world.  
“Oh.”  
Daisy shook her head at me and I left her room to go get ready for a night out.  
I brought my ear plugs. I wanted to make sure I had them in my pocket, just in case. I wasn’t familiar at all with the pub that Jemma and Daisy wanted us to go to. I really hadn’t done much socializing off base. I never really had a reason to until now. It turned out to just be a simple quiet little street corner pub. I left the ear plugs in my pocket, they would be there if I needed them. We took over a large corner booth and ordered drinks. Conversation came easy to Daisy and Jemma. You could tell they had a strong friendship. It didn’t take me very long to get caught up in talking with them. They were both so easy to get along with that I finally started to relax. It was nice to be off base and not be worried about time and missions. I had missed this, but that wasn’t to say I didn’t enjoy the work I was doing for SHIELD. Daisy had been right about that too, it did feel good to be taking action, making a difference. The three of us sat there joking around for a while and eventually Elena, Piper and a few of the other female agents joined us. We drank and talked, then the group of us meandered back to the base. We were a giggling mass of drunken happy females. We got a few good-natured laughs from the other agents as we filtered into the lounge for post drinking coffee and snacks. Some of us could clearly handle alcohol better than others. Elena, Daisy and I each had at least one tipsy agent to look after. We guided them to chairs and made sure they ate something and had large glasses of water available to them.  
“There might be a few hangovers in the morning.” I mused as I looked around at the various agents in the room. Some looked more drunk and disheveled than others. The ones that looked the worst had participated in a drinking contest with Elena. That really was not a wise choice on their parts.  
“Eres una persona que se emborracha fácilmente” Elena commented “Lightweights.”  
“You know that you have a fast metabolism, you never should have started a drinking game with them.” Daisy supplied half annoyed, half amused.  
Elena shrugged, looking quite innocent and I just laughed.  
“They’ll be fine as long as they drink plenty of water and get some rest.” Jemma stated, her voice firm and matter-of-fact.  
There were a couple people that still ended up with hangovers, but most of them managed to avoid it. Daisy and I were still up early and in the training room. The other women gradually came in, the ones that were fine joined us in working out, the couple with hangovers went directly for ice or hot packs and they took up whatever spaces they found most comfortable on the benches to watch us take turns sparring. Hangovers included, it had been a fun night and it was nice to unwind. It was also nice to be able to interact with more of the other agents in situations where it was easy to look normal. Fitz and Jemma still hadn’t nailed down exactly what I was, so the decision had stayed the same about keeping me mostly separate from the rest of the agents when it came to missions and situations where my abilities might be visible. It wasn’t fun to have to keep secrets directly from the people around you and I hadn’t done so in New York, but the average citizen wasn’t going to report everything they had seen to people in a position to make my life more difficult and be believed. An agent of SHIELD was far more credible than the average citizen as a generally accepted rule. Sure, there were exceptions in everything, but you had to start somewhere.

“Do stop talking. We are trying to get out of here alive.”  
“It’s not like it matters at this point, they already know we are here.”  
“Maybe, but they don’t know exactly where we are. So, HUSH.”  
The agents glared at me, but they finally stopped talking amongst themselves. The last thing I wanted to do was have to carry another person back to the base covered in blood. I had been saddled with this group of young agents and it was like herding cats dealing with them. I had no idea how much training they had or how well they had ranked, but they were a pain in my ass. It would be nice to be out with experienced agents, it would be nice to be out with Grey again. He was healing and being slowly allowed back into training, we had done some light sparring, but he still wasn’t cleared for fieldwork yet. They had him working in the lab to keep him busy. The other agents that I usually went on missions with, Daisy or Piper specifically, were busy with other things. The only experienced agent out with me now was Davis and I had him bringing up the rear. I tapped my comms.  
“Davis, what does it look like back there, do we have a way out?”  
“Almost clear, I’ll beep you when you can head back this way.”  
“Copy that.”  
I couldn’t see anything from my vantage point and the echoes in this building were making pinpointing the location of all the people difficult. The agents with me bickering wasn’t helping either. Now that I had gotten them to shut up I leaned against the wall and listened again. It was hard with all the feedback I was getting, but I was slowly able to make out distinct footfalls that I knew to be the opposing combatants. Door bells were easier to use to find structures, but I was trying to work with what I had. Which, truth be told, wasn’t much. Fitz had designed a sub-audible noisemaker that I could use to map buildings, but I hadn’t brought it along. Humans couldn’t hear it, but it would likely set off any dogs that were present. I signaled to the group with me to move out in a direction that I knew to be empty. As they moved down the hall I got the beep from Davis.  
“Move out, we are clear!”  
The pace quickened as the group moved towards the exits and Davis joined me in herding them out into the woods where the Quinjet was parked and cloaked. We were forced to duck and weave as we were noticed and started to take active fire. As soon as everyone was on the jet and accounted for I called for time. It didn’t look good.  
“About 30 minutes over the course allotted time.” Daisy said stepping into the back of the jet from the pilot seats. “There were also some major noise infractions. Those were added to the total time as a penalty.”  
“That is why it is important to not make unnecessary noise when on a mission.” I turned to the green agents. They looked suitably scolded. “Whether you feel you’ve lost the element of surprise or not you need to follow the orders of the agents running the mission. If you are told to be silent, be silent.”  
“We often need every advantage we can get.” Davis added. “We are usually going to be outnumbered, so everything counts.”  
“When we get back on base I want you all to report your mission brief to the designated agents, then you are done for the day. However, I strongly recommend that in your free time you all spend some quality time with the mat in the training room. Agent Piper can pair you off and give you pointers. If she is unavailable see Agent May.”  
There was a flurry of whispers in the group at the mention of May. No matter how many times SHIELD has been knocked down and rebuilt the story of Agent May as the cavalry still lived on. Just don’t let her hear you call her that. The story is a sore point with her. Daisy had given me the full story, not long after she found out that she was Inhuman herself. Of course, cavalry story aside, May was a badass through and through. I hadn’t gotten the chance to work with her personally, but I knew that if I did I would not be having to worry about her having my back. Unlike this group of new kids, we had been training today. It’s like they got younger and younger with each incoming class. It was just too bad that the SHIELD academies had been destroyed when HYDRA came out of hiding. That was a more efficient way of producing agents. Though the academies had been highly specialized and anymore we needed people that could do a variety of jobs. It wasn’t as segregated as it used to be from what I had been told. I don’t know how well I would have fit into the previous incarnations of SHIELD. Hell, I wasn’t completely sure how well I fit into this version of it.  
I was so distracted that I ran smack into the rock-solid mass of man that was Grey just inside the hanger doors when we arrived back on base. He caught me easily as I teetered slightly on my feet, then stepped back to arms-length to look at me. He took one look at the sour expression on my face and shook his head grinning.  
“You’re not really cut out for this training wheels thing.”  
“No, I think I’m really not. Especially with this most recent group. They don’t listen for shit and they are exceedingly loud. I’m hoping this last exercise impressed the importance of quiet on them. Though to be fair they won’t always be working with someone like me, but they don’t need to know that.”  
“How did they do, while we’re on the subject?”  
“30 minutes over time with noise penalty.”  
“Ouch.”  
“Yeah it was bad. They need to reread the definition of stealth.”  
“You want to go a couple rounds and work out your frustrations?”  
“On you? Are you cleared for me to actually kick your ass yet?”  
“Just got cleared today, you can ask Jemma if you don’t believe me.”  
“I will, then meet me in the training room, wear pads.”  
“Yes ma’am” He almost saluted, then thought the better of it.  
I swung by the lab to check with Jemma, I didn’t want to mess up Grey’s healing schedule by just accepting his word on the matter. I knew how ready he was to be back in full combat. He was tired of being left behind as everyone else went on missions. Jemma asked that I still go easy on him given my level of strength vs standard humans, but told me that he had in fact been cleared for duty again. I thanked her and went to meet Grey. He could normally take quite a beating from me, so I would just have to remember it was like sparring with the other agents. I was fairly convinced that Grey wasn’t completely human as well. I knew he would probably be a little rusty from his time off, but it was good that he was cleared for action again. I could use this sparring session to find out exactly where he was in his healing and we would go from there. It was easier to design a workout schedule for someone when you knew exactly where they stood physically. I was going to be his unofficial physical therapist. At least I knew that he would listen to me, that was a bonus after having my words fall on deaf ears all night working with the junior agents.  
Grey was wearing pads, just as I asked. He looked so genuinely happy to be allowed to spar again that I almost felt bad for kicking his ass. Almost. Even with me holding back it was nowhere near like our normal fights went. He was just so out of shape and still a little limited in his movements from where the cuts made his body stiff. After the second time I easily knocked him to the mat I called off our rounds. Grey grudgingly accepted my advice, that we stop while we are ahead. I could tell that he was sore, though he was doing a good job of trying to hide it. His body temperature was risen, his face was pink, and he was covered in sweat. I hadn’t pushed him hard at all, but I could tell he was already tired. I offered him a massage in trade for him to continue to go easy on himself. I could tell that the bodywork would really help him get his flexibility and reach back. I had discussed this plan with Jemma early on in his healing, I knew how much it had helped the other people I had used it on and I am still a firm believer in how much simple touch can heal people in general. He gladly accepted my offer when I explained how much massage helped scars heal.   
I started the massage off slowly, being very careful with the amount of pressure I put on the scars from the cuts, but they seemed to have healed enough that pressure didn’t cause him too much discomfort, so I just set to work removing any knots he had in his muscles and applying vitamin E oil to the surface of the scars. Scar tissue typically responded well to massage and the vitamin E is great for skin. It didn’t take very long before Grey was dozing on the massage table. I had to wake him up to have him roll over so that I could get his back. I woke him up again when I was done and suggested that he take a shower, then go to bed. It would wash off some of the ointment, but no one likes sleeping in grease anyway. Or at least, most people don’t. Our normal drinks after sparring would have to take a raincheck. He was so tired that he simply accepted my suggestion. It told me what I needed it to though, we would have to rebuild his endurance as well as his muscles. That was to be expected for someone on the mend, all in all he was doing well.  
I still hadn’t talked to him, or anyone else about cuddling. There just hadn’t been a good time, and after he got injured, I backburned my needs. Though I could tell that he enjoyed my company I didn’t want to base any ideas on just that. You can enjoy spending time with someone and still not be comfortable with something like full on cuddling. Me just throwing my legs across him on the couch is different. I decided I would just have to ask him, since wondering about it wasn’t going to get me anywhere. Then I would just hope that my asking wouldn’t freak him out and mess up our friendship. Gosh people are so complicated at the same time so very simple. I had no plans to ask tonight however, so I just helped him groggily walk back to his room, said good night and told him I’d see him tomorrow for training as usual. We would still be taking it slow, but I could get him back into the swing of things with regular training sessions regardless of how easy I took it on him. I went back to the training room myself to run on the treadmill for a while. It hadn’t taken much effort to work with Grey today, so I needed to supplement my routine with other things to keep myself in shape. Just because I couldn’t work out with him didn’t mean I could slack myself. Daisy came in to run on the treadmill next to mine.  
“I heard Grey is back to getting his ass kicked by you again, how is he doing?”  
“He’s lost quite a bit of his muscle mass and endurance, but that was to be expected.”  
“Is he taking it well?”  
“So far, he is, but I don’t know how long that will last. He is beyond ready to be doing things again.”  
“That’s not at all surprising.”  
“Nope, it’s really not. What is surprising is that he is following my advice.” I finished with a laugh.  
Daisy laughed with me, then we dropped into a comfortable silence as we continued our running. I was working at an easy pace, just keeping my endurance up and creating a nice level of sweat. Once you are in shape it doesn’t take much to maintain it, but if you must take time off for whatever reason that condition you’ve worked so hard to achieve goes away quickly. Physical fitness was one of those things that the if you don’t use it, you will lose it, phrase applied completely.  
Grey was already in the training room when I walked in the next morning. It might get harder to keep him from over exerting himself if he was going to try to beat me here every day. At least he was just doing dynamic stretches and not shoving weights around.  
“You’re here early.”  
“I couldn’t sit still.”  
“Fair enough, just don’t make me tie you to your bed or lock you in your room.”  
He smiled at me and raised his hands in mock surrender, “I wouldn’t dream of it, or maybe I would, depending on if I had a choice as to which one you did.”  
I threw a squishy ball at him, it bounced off his side and rolled across the floor.  
“Ouch! Abuse, abuse!”  
“Big baby. Shall we get started then?”  
“Waiting on you coach.”  
I rolled my eyes at him, but I moved to one of the machines at set the weight resistance on it. Checked that Grey could easily move it without straining, then set up a machine for myself. Jemma had given me a list of exercises to focus on to best help him recover from where he had been cut and how long he had been kept from working out. I didn’t mind playing babysitter for him since I knew he would do the same for me when necessary. We were good at keeping each other in check.  
I put in my earbuds as the noise level in the room increased. Piper had the group of green agents I had taken on mission working through sparring pairs, and just like on the mission, they didn’t know how to do it quietly. Here I didn’t mind as much though, a little friendly competition in the training room was good for them. As my earbuds were specially designed, thanks Fitz, to greatly reduce background noise I could focus on what I was doing without having a sensory overload due to the other agents good natured yelling. They still allowed in enough noise that I didn’t get paranoid wearing them, that had taken some fine-tuning. I still needed to be aware of my surroundings, they just needed muffled sometimes. That man truly was brilliant. He had started working on a prototype as soon as I came to him with my problem. I had been using ear plugs, but he thought that was ridiculous and quickly designed special comms calibrated to my hearing range, then he added these, “as a bonus for use during my time off.” He was so sweet. No wonder Jemma loved him. They were adorable together.  
We rounded off our impromptu gym class with another round of light sparring. I still refused to back off enough to let Grey win easily, I wanted to remind him how far he still needed to come to get back into shape since normally we were almost evenly matched. That was another reason I didn’t believe he was fully human. I had never asked though. It was easy enough to tell with Inhumans like Daisy, since their powers are obvious, but if Grey just had enhanced strength or something else it would be easy to miss. Of course, as I had proven, someone didn’t have to be Inhuman to be powered. It could be any number of things that made him different, and made him a match for me on the mat. When we were finished I dropped by the lab and gave Jemma my opinion. Grey could probably hold his own, on short missions with other competent agents. She agreed and said she would pass our combined recommendations on to Mace since it was ultimately his decision on what agents went into the field and who they were assigned as partners. I only hoped that meant I would have my partner back. This ‘musical partners’ business was getting old, and I was beyond done being a trainer all the time. Regardless of how good Mace claimed I was at it. The occasional training run wasn’t bad, but these runs with full batches of green agents took its toll on my mental state. They were exhausting.  
I went back to the lounge to meet Grey for our customary drinks. He had already staked out a table in the corner and had a pair of glasses in front of him.  
“Bad enough that you’re two fisted drinking?”  
“You’re the worst trainer ever, so yes.” He said as he slid my drink across the table to me.  
“I’ll remember that for tomorrow.”  
Grey groaned, “I’ve really done it now, haven’t I?”  
I just smiled innocently at him and took my seat. “Eh, maybe, maybe not. I do want to ask you something though.”  
He eyed me curiously. It was now or never. Just ask him, the worst he can say is no. I took a breath.  
“I don’t have anyone here, not like I had in New York.” I added when he looked like he might say something.  
“Okay, go on.”  
“I need a cuddle buddy. Doesn’t have to mean anything, it’s a health thing.” I said in a rush as I picked at my hand under the table. There, I said it, now I wait.  
“Oh.” He paused, visibly surprised. Shit. Here it comes. “Why didn’t you say something?”  
Wait. He was cool with it? “I didn’t want to make things awkward.” I half mumbled.  
“I think we went way past awkward the first day you pinned me to the mat without breaking a sweat.”  
“I guess that’s fair, but you told me not to hold back.” I reminded him, reaching for my glass.  
He grinned at me and reached over to squeeze my hand. “I get it, trust me I do. If it helps you, we can cuddle. No big deal, no pressure.”  
“Thank you, really.” I meant it.  
That had been far easier to sort out than I had figured. Then again, Grey did have a point. We already had an established relationship of trust and helping each other out as partners. It wasn’t too much of a stretch from that to flopping down together on the couch to cuddle and watch a movie or whatever. Or carrying his bloody bulk back to base, I reminded myself. There was just such a stigma with physical contact for most people that I occasionally got hung up on it as well. We finished our drinks and people watched like we normally do. Occasionally we talked about the new agents and how they were doing in their training and what goals Grey had to meet as he healed. He eventually asked me for another massage, noting how well he had slept last night. I agreed that it was probably a good idea and we went back to the corner of the training room that I had set up as a massage area not long after I had come to SHIELD. We did have a masseuse on call, but I understood his preference for someone he knew to do it. We had traded massages a few times after missions not long into our partnership, so any awkwardness surrounding us working together had gone away relatively fast. I knew that the other agents were also very happy to have this here, it had been a huge hit as soon as I had gotten it cleared with Mace. We had to wait for the room to become available when we got there, the masseuse had a small line of agents waiting after they finished training for the day. Which just served as further proof to me that humans need touch to heal. I decided I didn’t feel like waiting and just had Grey decide, my room or his. He chose mine, he claimed his was a tad messy. I believed him, being on limited duty meant something as simple as picking up after yourself was a chore. I laid out towels to protect my blankets from the Vitamin E oil and built up the blankets and pillows into a mock table. It wasn’t as good as the real thing, but it would do. Of course, I had forgotten the fact that the last time I gave him a massage he had fallen asleep, until he was snoozing peacefully on my bed. This time he didn’t wake up easily when I tapped on him. Talk about not doing a good job of planning ahead. I gave up on trying to wake him. I threw a blanket over him, curled up on my couch and fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

The first thing I was aware of was that I had fallen asleep at an odd angle. The next thing was that someone was snoring, very close by. I tried to shift my position to relieve the kinks I had put my body in as I started to wake up. I was on my couch, why was I on my couch. Then the snore came again. Oh, yeah. I peeked blearily up from my crumpled position to see Grey, still sleeping very soundly on the pile of pillows and blankets I had placed on my bed to create the make-shift massage table. Well, at least one of us was comfortable. I glanced at the clock, it was almost 4 in the morning. Even the earliest of risers here wouldn’t be awake yet, though there was the night shift people who would still be awake and moving around the base, they typically had no need to come down into the living area. So, I could conceivably wake him up and kick him out without anyone making any comments. Just because we had agreed yesterday to cuddling didn’t mean I wanted our relationship or lack thereof to be the hot gossip around base. It also didn’t mean that Grey wanted to be seen leaving my room bright and early in the morning. I still wasn’t completely sure exactly what his take on whatever we had was. Everyone here being adults didn’t guarantee anything along the lines of privacy, or maturity for that matter.  
Grey shifted in his sleep and groaned a little. I had figured that he was still in more pain than he let on and here was my proof. I just couldn’t bring myself to wake him. Base rumor mill be damned. He needed his sleep and aside from some mild discomfort when he had moved he seemed to be getting it here. I would have to see if I could get him to talk to me when he woke about how well he had been sleeping in his own room. I knew there were some subtle differences in the way we both had our rooms set-up, and I was willing to help him tweak his. I was even willing to help him clean up whatever mess I knew would be in there. He had been such a great help to me when I started settling in on base that I felt bad for not getting involved sooner. I just didn’t want to intrude into his space after spending so much time checking on him when he was in the medical wing. I knew that sometimes I needed to be alone and I wanted to afford him that luxury when I could as well. I quietly got up and changed out of my clothes from the night before. Sleeping in them had left marks all over my body and I quickly remembered why I usually slept in as little as possible. Sleeping naked as an agent wasn’t always achievable, but there had been some great advancements in pajamas in the last few years. So, unless I was trying to catch a few minutes of sleep in the field I usually avoided sleeping in any of the clothes I wore for training. While I changed I listened to the pattern of Grey’s breathing. I wasn’t too concerned about him waking up, but I wanted to know his status anyway. Being partners means that we have seen plenty of each other, but he was always so modest that I didn’t want to shock him by randomly being naked when he woke up. Even if he was in my room. I snickered to myself.  
I need not have worried. His breathing the whole time I changed told me he was still in a deep sleep. I grabbed a few basic items and went to take a shower. I decided to just start my day with a run and see if I could get my body to forgive me for sleeping on that couch. It wasn’t even that great of a place to sit, so I felt it was time to get rid of it, see about getting a better one. If I was going to be hosting sleepover parties I needed a good spot for me to crash as well. If I had to venture a guess, I’d say after what had happened on that mission Grey might be sleeping better just because someone was there. I wasn’t completely versed in the psychology of it, but I had always put stock in the fact that people who had experienced a trauma did better when surrounded by people that they trusted. Even after my minor mental breakdown following the mission I knew that Grey trusted me. He had made sure that he told me that several times. I think Daisy had talked to him. I wasn’t sure how much I deserved that trust, but I also knew that wasn’t up to me. ‘You don’t get to decide who cares about you.’ Yeah, yeah. I had listened to that pep talk just like Daisy had. It was true though, no point in trying to deny that. I was with a group of people here who cared more than most.  
I opted to run first, then shower. Whatever funk I had from last night could wait long enough for me to get sweaty. No point in making myself shower twice. The training room was empty, except for me and agent May. She was on the mats doing her very slow, practiced Tai Chi based movements. She didn’t do anything to acknowledge my presence other than to pause slightly when I came in. I nodded in her direction and picked a treadmill. I knew she wasn’t going to bother me anymore than I bothered her. I picked up a nice easy pace and just reveled in the fluid movement of my body. My muscles warmed up and began to loosen the knots that had gathered in them overnight. The only sounds in the room were our breathing and my footfalls. I slowed long enough to put my earbuds in, then regained my previous speed. I knew that the rest of the base was going to start waking up and the noise level would increase as they did, so I wanted to get ahead of the noise by already having my earbuds in. I really needed to thank Fitz for these when I got the chance. This was a truly brilliant and thoughtful gift.  
I wrapped up my workout, cleaned off my treadmill and showered. I carefully opened the door to my room and peeked inside. Grey was still passed out, stretched rather inelegantly across my bed. How he could still look so damn regal in that sprawl was beyond me. Maybe we were more alike than I gave us credit for. Being able to still look good stretched out like that was surely more cat than dog. Though his mouth was open slightly and a small buzzing snore was occasionally escaping it. So, there was a flaw, if I was being as picky as possible. He must have been totally exhausted, to still be asleep after having slept the whole night. Parts of his bare shoulders poked out over the blanket I had dropped on him. Some of the fresh scars were visible there, still a brighter pink than the older ones. I wouldn’t call them flaws though. Scars were badges of honor. They simply showed where something had tried to kill you, and failed.   
I stopped in the doorway and sighed. ‘I should probably wake him up,’ I thought as I stood there. I threw my pile of dirty clothes from my work-out on him. He didn’t even move, but I did hear the change in the pitch of his breathing that signaled he was beginning to wake up.  
“I’m going to need my bed back.”  
He slowly rolled onto his side and cracked an eye at me.  
“Good morning, sunshine.”  
I just watched him as he looked around and got his bearings. “I’m not in my room.”  
“No, you’re not. You kind of fell asleep and I decided to not fight to wake you.”  
“Uh, thanks, I think.” He started sitting up and I moved closer to him just to make sure he didn’t just tip over. I wasn’t sure how groggy he would still be.  
“You slept really hard, you haven’t been sleeping, have you?” I searched his face as I waited for him to answer. He didn’t seem like he wanted to.  
“Not really.” He admitted finally. His eyes were soft and bright, but he wouldn’t meet my gaze.  
“Anything I can do to help?” I slowly reached out and placed my hand on his shoulder. My touch was light so that he could easily shrug it off if he wanted to. He didn’t move at all. I lightly brushed my thumb across one of the raised pink scars as I watched his face for any sign that I needed to back off. His breathing hitched slightly, and his eyes snapped to mine, yet he didn’t remove my hand. He always said his scars were stories, and this story involved me. I was a permanent fixture in his life now, no matter what happened between us. His skin was warm and soft under my palm.  
“You already have.” He smiled gently at me, it was clear he was fully awake, and I was less concerned that he would fall over now.  
I let my hand slide off his shoulder as I stepped back to give him some space. He stood and gathered himself, his shirt and jacket were on the floor next to the bed. I reached down and grabbed them for him. Then I left him alone again so that he could collect his things and go to his room when he was ready. I was glad that he said I was already helping him. I would just have to take his word for it. I still wasn’t sure what we had, but I knew that it was hard to picture life without him in it. He was such a rock for me and seeing him so hurt had shaken me to the core. Everyone gets attached to something. Damnit.

There was an overwhelming smell of ozone in the air. The rain had been coming down in sheets for a several minutes now. The first streak of lightening cracked across the horizon, followed almost immediately by the clap of thunder. It lit up the silhouettes of the buildings around us and reminded me just how hard the rain was coming down. The bulk of the storm was directly above us now. Grey leaned in next to me to look out at the clouds. The compound was dark, illuminated only by flashes of lightning. There weren’t even any security lights on the buildings. That should provide a good amount of cover for us as we moved, and the rain would mask any sounds we might make. It would also obscure any footprints. It was hard to tell how many people had been moving around in the area with the water covering portions of the ground.  
“It will be a while before this storm breaks.” I whispered.  
“I’m noticing that.”  
“Continue to stand-by,” I announced into my comms as Grey nodded at me and motioned for me to move forward. “We’re going to scout ahead.”  
I dialed my ear pieces in to cancel out more of the sounds as Grey and I stepped out into the storm. I needed to be able to focus on specific sounds and the more I could weed out background noises the easier it would be. It didn’t take long for the continuous shower to soak me all the way to my skin. My armor was going to need a serious amount of care when we got done here. Grey and I silently moved forward to the next building, for such a large guy he really could move well. I could count on him to have my back and do it quietly. This was his first mission since he had been injured, but our training had gone really to plan. We didn’t expect this to have any major roadblocks to our progress. So far, so good. Of course, we had only just started, and this freak thunderstorm might change things. I would have to keep an eye on him. The agents we were with were a mix of veteran and green, but they had been improving on the practice runs. I had to count on the fact that they could take care of themselves and each other. I couldn’t let concern for their performance get in the way of what I needed to do, I just needed to focus on my mission. I would get the intel that we came for and make sure that Grey got in and out in one piece. Simple, and hopefully easy.  
The rain was cold, and I saw Grey try to stifle a shiver. For being such a big tough guy, he sure was responsive to environmental temperature drops. Maybe Fitz could make him a heater for his suit. I cracked some of the hand warmers I had brought and dropped one down his collar, the others I pocketed until I knew if he would need them or not. If I absolutely had to, I could use my body heat to warm him up, but that was a last resort. He flinched at the unannounced physical contact, but when he realized what happened, he visibly relaxed and turned to grin at me.  
“Just trying to help. I don’t need you getting hypothermic on me.”  
“How are you not cold?” His voice waivered slightly as he shivered again. “Don’t you feel it?”  
“Don’t know, I can feel that it’s cold, I just don’t feel cold myself. I never thought about it much.”  
“It shouldn’t be something you think about, you either get cold or you don’t”  
I shrugged. “I guess I don’t then. We’ll add it to the list of things for Simmons to investigate when we get back to base.”  
I gently pushed Grey inside the door after checking that the coast was clear. I quickly reached out and checked his body temperature, it was lower than normal, but not low enough to pull him from the mission immediately. The hand warmers seemed to be helping keep his core temp up, I handed him the extras I had held back, and he placed them inside his gear. I beeped my comms.  
“The rain is cold, try to avoid spending any time out in it, continue to hold position and wait for updates.”  
As soon as I got confirmation from my agents I turned back to Grey, and we began searching the room. We had heard from some of our sources that there was some Stark tech here. We were on a reclaim or destroy mission. Obviously if we could haul it out that was the preferred outcome, but if we couldn’t safely move it I had some explosives to play with. Better it be destroyed than on the black market. I just wasn’t sure how large this item was going to be. That’s why Grey was on point with me for this. I needed someone else who I knew could carry a substantial amount of weight if necessary. As I searched I received a beep on my comms.  
“We are tracking movement in the building next to yours. Unsure as to what it is, but it’s got a good-sized heat signature.”  
“Understood. We are ready to engage.”  
I waited for Grey to get a good position by the door between the two buildings, then I jumped up to the window above him. There was a small catwalk around this edge of the building that would give me just enough momentum to make it through the glass if necessary. I looked out across the alley at the other building. I had a clear jump, through this window and directly into the next building. The shattering glass would give my presence away though. I looked down. Grey nodded at me, knowing what I intended to do. So, I took a few steps back, launched forward and jumped just before my body met the window. I felt the glass break against my skin, a brief period of rain and wind as I spanned the distance between the buildings, then glass again as I made contact. I tucked into a roll once I was clear of what had been the window and sprung to my feet on the shop floor. I flicked my wrists as I came to my full standing position to summon my daggers. Looking around, I quickly realized the large heat signature that had been picked up by our scanners was a complete set of hulk buster sized armor. There were three, now very surprised men who had been welding on it causing the metal to heat up. Grey was through the door behind me in the seconds that it took the men to decide if they should fight or run. They opted for running. That was probably a wise choice.  
The two of us fully decked out for battle did make for quite the impressive sight. Grey had started wearing armor that was very similar to mine after coming up on the losing end of the knives on that mission. It still wasn’t something that was standard issue over the full span of agents, but it was allowed if they wanted it. That was a step in the right direction at least. Much like everything else he wore, he looked damn impressive in it. Grey lifted his hand to his ear as he beeped his comms.  
“We have three runners. You are cleared to engage. We have located the Stark tech.”  
“There are outside forces coming in, base recommends you blow whatever you have found and go dark. We’ll see you when you get back.” The voice in my ear was an upper level agent quarterbacking the mission. If they were calling us out it was about to get messy. Again. I looked at Grey, but he looked as confident as ever. It was clear to me that we had both gotten the message loud and clear. This had just become the kind of mission we excelled at. I reached for the ordinance that were strapped in a bag on my belt. They weren’t large, but they were effective. Just like me. I grinned as a plan blossomed in my mind.  
“Secure the building while I rig this, then we book it for cover.”  
Grey nodded and provided cover fire for me as I heard the telltale sounds of the agents outside battling their way back to the jets and hopefully providing even more of a distraction. That was always the plan if things got hairy. Things were officially hairy now. I got the armor rigged even faster than our practice time and shouted for Grey to run to the exit. We cleared the building and I detonated the explosives. Grey grabbed me and pulled me down next to a ditch, covering me on instinct with his body as some debris came down around us. Water from the ditch splashed up at us as and we squished down into the mud slightly as we waited for everything to stop falling.  
“At least it has stopped raining.” He hummed happily.  
I laughed at him, slid sideways into the water to get clear of his bulk and hauled him to his feet as I started running for where our Quinjet was parked. We were both soaked to the skin and covered in mud, but I would take that any day after hauling him back to base bleeding, I could tell it was going to take me a while to get over that. Amazingly we had both avoided major injury. I had a few surface cuts from my glass shower, but I had achieved my goal. Grey was uninjured. Muddy and cold, yes, but at least this time he wasn’t bruised and bleeding.  
I accepted my fate as Grey directed me to sit down on the seat in the jet and he began cleaning the mud and blood off my skin as he looked for any serious wounds. We had made sure to check that all the medical kits on the jets were fully stocked before we agreed to come on the mission. It was quickly becoming a competition as to who could get the other clean faster. Grey was gently trying to find me under the layer of mud and I was roughly toweling him off trying to get him back to normal temperatures. He barely flinched as I stepped back and stripped my armor off to make sure I hadn’t missed anything. I separated the pieces and began removing the muck from them as well. I sat there on the bench in a sports bra and leggings as I slowly took over the floor and wall space with my gear.  
“It’s nothing you haven’t seen before, though you were kind of dying the last time you saw it.”  
I sparred in roughly this outfit, so really, I wasn’t sure what he kept staring at. Maybe it was all the mud and blood that made it different. Things do have a different light to them outside training exercises.  
“I still don’t get how you aren’t cold.” He deflected. “I am getting used to your lack of modesty though.”  
I threw a clump of mud at him in response. It stuck squarely to his forehead and he simply sighed as he wiped it off.  
“How did you make it through medical training being so damn body shy?”  
“It’s different when I don’t know them personally.”  
“Ah, familiarity breeds contempt?”  
He snorted, but didn’t respond. He instead turned his focus to finishing the drying job I had started on him. I guessed that constantly seeing your partner strip down to nothing aside from skin tight soaked underclothes might be a bit traumatizing, but he never did ask me not to and I had asked him about it after the first time he had reacted to it there on the sparring mats. He just told me it was something he was working on and I should continue just being myself. He did tend to focus on the random scars I had, but I couldn’t even give him answers as to where I got most of them. He had asked, the first time he saw them, he wanted to know what had happened to me and if that had made me the way I am about things. I honestly told him that I wasn’t sure. I simply couldn’t remember.  
Maybe that was it, he seemed to have no issue sporting scars himself, but mine made him nervous. After all, he knew all the stories that his scars told and was able to answer any questions about them. Some he answered with difficulty, but those were only his most recent set, the ones he got while on the mission with me. Getting ambushed will cause a person pause though, especially one as strong as Grey. He was used to having the upper hand.  
I guess it was easier for him to remember that I wasn’t invincible when he saw my scars. I didn’t want to push the subject if he wasn’t ready to talk about it. I pulled dry clothes out of the bag I left on the jet and pulled them on over my soaked clothes, then used the length of the shirt to strip the dirty clothes off. It’s not healthy to just sit and stew in muck and it was way more comfortable to get changed into clean dry clothes to wait until we got back to base. Grey didn’t seem to mind this dance as much, so it was one I had done frequently after missions. I was an expert at changing all my undergarments without removing my top layer of clothes. Living on the street teaches you all sorts of random things. In this case they were random, but very useful things.  
We gave our mission report when we got back to base. The other agents made it out with few injuries, so that was a bonus. I trudged off to my room, my poor abused armor in tow. Grey followed me with his armor as I grabbed my cleaning supplies and set to work. He was watching with a look of fascination on his face as I carefully removed the muck and polished my armor back to its usual matte finish. You didn’t want too much of a shine on tactical gear.  
“What’s in your head?” I asked, pausing only slightly to look directly at him.  
“Your attention to detail.”  
“I actually zone out when I do this, it’s relaxing.”  
“That’s only because you’ve done it so many times that it’s second nature. It’s still amazing to watch.”  
“Thanks, I’ll take your word for it since you’re the first one to really watch me work.”  
“I hope I’m not intruding…”  
“Oh, no, that’s not it at all, all of this is still so new to me. Having a team, having a partner that has my back no matter what.”  
Grey smiled as I finished speaking. “And I always will.”  
It was my turn to smile at him. I had really lucked out when it came to my partner here. Even if he was a cactus covered marshmallow. I had decided that, that wasn’t a bad thing. That wasn’t a bad thing to be at all. Being here, being a part of SHIELD, with the people that I worked with, it just reinforced the fact that someone could be tender, they could care about people and the world and they could still make a difference while doing it. I didn’t have to become some unfeeling robot to create change. It could happen in the smallest of ways. I could be a damsel, I could even be in distress, and none of that was a bad thing if I just kept trying. Something in my mind told me I’d had this before, but since I couldn’t remember, I just brushed it aside.


	8. Chapter 8

Holidays on base were strange. We were quite the mismatched bunch, but we knew how to celebrate.  
I was so stuffed that I wasn’t sure that I could move.  
“Oh, I ate way too much.” Grey voiced my thoughts out loud.  
“Same here. I might have to roll away from the table.”  
“I couldn’t help myself, there was just so much good food. I had to have some of everything.”  
“Me too.”  
I forced myself to get up and walk away from the table. I felt oddly proportioned, like my body was made of mismatched parts out of a bin at the back of the factory. I loosely waddled over to the couch and gently dropped onto the cushions. I was followed by agents moving at varying speeds, they each claimed a space on one of the couches or chairs in the lounge and spread out like dropped dough. Grey picked my feet up and sat on the couch with me, placing my feet back down in his lap. I raised an eyebrow at him, but he ignored me. I’m usually the one to initiate contact. Some of the other agents looked at us for a minute, then thought better of making a comment. We were far from being ‘a thing’ but Grey had gradually gotten more used to how affectionate I liked to be with people I was close with, this was the first time he had really done anything like this in front of a group though. It was going to take me a while to figure him out. If I ever did. I could accept that, that might not be something that would ever happen. We were good friends, he was an excellent hugger and quality cuddler. All these things were just fine in my eyes.

“Have you talked to Elle recently, with the holidays and such, I mean.”  
“Yeah we talked on the phone this morning. She is doing well. We still miss each other, but she’s got a steady partner now. So that’s a bonus for her. She wouldn’t tell me who, just said that it was someone I had met and talked to her about.”  
“You’re okay with that?”  
“Absolutely, all I have ever wanted was for her to be happy. Whether that was with me or not was never a factor when it came down to it.”  
He studied my face, then seemed to see that I was serious. Which I was, I knew that I couldn’t be all things to all people, Elle deserved someone that could be everything to her. That made me happy.

‘The ones who think they are crazy enough to change the world are the ones that actually do.’  
My hair is short, but it still fell on my face in such a way that it was annoying me. I blew air up at it, trying to get it off my skin. The hair just fluttered where it was, and my efforts were wasted. I shoved my hands through it, that pulled it away from my forehead enough for the skin to breathe. It didn’t seem to take long for the hair falling across there to make it warm.  
What I was doing, working with SHIELD, it was making a difference. I had to learn to measure the difference I made in smaller amounts. It wasn’t about saving the whole world. It was about making a small corner of it better and branching out from there. “Pieces solving the puzzle.” I mumbled to myself, again. It was an easy mantra to adopt, bless Daisy for that. Coulson had told me that when he stepped down he had hoped that Daisy could be the director of SHIELD, but that obviously hadn’t happened. She was a born leader though. A large part of me hoped that I could live to see the day that she was in a leadership role high up in an agency, if not the director.  
I moved into the building in front of Grey. The plan was for me to scout it out, then call for the other agents. Grey was covering my back, waiting just outside the main door. Thermal scans had shown the building was empty, but we had to be sure, the rules had changed many times over the past few years. My energy scans had shown something, it just wasn’t clear what. Just because a building scanned as empty, didn’t mean that it was. I saw the explosives just as I made it into the main room. There was no time to even turn around. There was a bright flash and a loud bang. My ears were ringing. Even with the noise canceling feature built into my comms that blast had hurt. My head was spinning as I felt myself being thrown backwards into a solid object. Probably a wall, not that it mattered what I hit, only how much it hurt to connect with it. I felt the wall buckle and as it came down the building crumpled on top of me. I could vaguely make out shapes and movement in the chaos after the explosion, someone was shouting, then everything faded to black.  
Then I was catching snippets of conversation.  
“Even with her healing factor, if we don’t get her out, she is going to die.” I recognized the voice as Grey, but I was unable to move or respond.  
Piper sounded stressed. “I don’t know anything about her biology, everything I’m seeing is wrong.”  
“Just figure out how to stop the bleeding, she can probably heal herself if we buy her some time.” Grey huffed, he sounded winded, like he was carrying a heavy weight after running.  
“I just hope you are right.”  
Everything hurt and at the same time I couldn’t pinpoint a single feeling. I was sure I could feel the world spinning though, and I still couldn’t move or open my eyes. I was vaguely aware that everything I could hear was extremely muffled. I had absolutely no idea why. Before I had long enough to think about it everything went black again.  
“Scans show that she is drifting in and out of consciousness, but everything else has stabilized. I don’t know how she survived that blast, but I’m happy she did.” Jemma’s voice floated to my ears. It sounded like I was listening to her from under water. I could just barely make out what she was saying.  
“When will she wake up?” Grey sounded worried.  
“I’m afraid that is up to her body, we have done all we can to make her comfortable, and those ear muffs will let her rest, hopefully undisturbed for as long as possible.” Jemma continued. “Rest really is the best thing for her now. You can stay here as long as you like though, call me if she wakes up.”  
‘Rest does sound amazing.’ I managed to think to myself. I didn’t seem to be in full control of my body. It was like my brain was awake, I was aware of some things, but I wasn’t connected to the rest of me. Based on what I overheard that was probably a good thing. It sounded to me like the rest of me was pretty banged up and the longer I went without having to feel it the better. Despite this knowledge, I tried to see what I could feel, see if I could do a system check and see what the damage was. After concentrating on it for a few minutes, I could feel my face and something fuzzy was over my ears. That must be the ear muffs. Probably another very well thought out gift from Fitz, so I wasn’t suddenly flooded with sounds as I regained my senses. He deserved a hug for that, he was always so thoughtful when it came to the limitations caused by my abilities. I’m sure there would be a lot of people that deserved hugs for whatever they had pulled me out of. As soon as I was in complete control of my body again that would be the first thing I would do.  
I didn’t know how long I was out for, I just knew that suddenly I could feel my body and it hurt. I let my breath out with a hiss that betrayed the fact that I was awake and felt movement beside me. There was a very large, warm hand that gently came to rest on my arm as I struggled to open my eyes. I heard was sounded like the click of a button depressing somewhere next to me and I could faintly hear running footsteps following a low tone in the hallway. I opened my eyes to Grey standing by my side in a dimly lit room. As I began to take in my surroundings I realized I was in a hospital type room, but all the monitoring equipment that was attached to me was humming silently along. They must have done something to mute the normal beeps and tones. All the monitors had the normal numbers and lines, but the standard beep that would have marked my heart rate changing as I woke was missing. I was still wearing the fuzzy ear muff things. They really had gone above and beyond to tailor the room to benefit me. My eyes wondered back to meet Grey’s just as Jemma came rushing into the room. I didn’t have time to make anything of the look on his face before I was distracted again.  
“She’s awake?”  
Grey nodded to her as he gave my arm a gentle squeeze. “She is, finally.” He reached up slowly, as if to not startle me with any sudden movements, and removed the ear muffs. The world came crashing back in and I closed my eyes for a few seconds as I let myself readjust to the increased levels of noise. When I felt like I had everything back under control I looked over at Jemma, who was patiently waiting at the edge of my bed with a clipboard. I smiled at her and she stepped forward.  
Jemma helped Grey sit me up in the bed, then began fussing over me, using various gages to check my eye movement and pupil response. She used a light and magnifier to look in my ears as well. She seemed happy with the results and she began writing down numbers as she asked me what my name was, how I was feeling, and what I could remember. I croaked out my answers and she held up a cup of water with a straw for me to drink. It felt like I had several balls of cotton stuffed in my mouth and my lips were chapped. They must have used a breathing tube on me at some point. How badly had I been hurt?  
“Do you know how long you have been out for?”  
“No.”  
“You were in and out of consciousness for over a week, I have been conferring with as my SHIELD doctors as I can without compromising you, but no one had any ideas about what to do. So, we just kept you stable and waited.”  
“What happened? I kind of remember seeing explosives in the room, and very little after that. It is all patchy.”  
“Well, Grey here hauled most of a building off you and Piper patched you up in the field. Then you were brought back to base. You were touch and go for a while there, but here you are now. Awake and whole, truly a marvel.”  
“Thanks, I think.”  
“You’ve still got bruises everywhere, a few broken bones and some cuts, but everything appears to be healing at your normal rate.” Jemma sounded the perfect medical professional. “I will give you some time to collect your bearings, then I think we should get you up and walking. We need to see if anything else was affected.”  
“Walking so soon after she just woke up?”  
“Yes, the sooner we know if there is any lasting damage the better. With her healing rate we need to keep on top of her motor function.” She directed her attention from him back to me. “I want to avoid as much muscle loss as possible, but you have been laid up for a week, so you might be far from what you are used to. I just ask that as we begin to get you moving that you have patience and let us help you.”  
“I’ll try.”  
“I’ll be here every step of the way, if that is okay with you of course.” Grey added hastily.  
I smiled at him. “I’d like that very much.”  
My body and limbs all felt very heavy and floppy, but I wiggled all my fingers and toes. My head swam a little with every movement I took, but everything still worked. That was a start. Jemma said I might have to basically learn how to walk again, she wasn’t sure how much muscle or coordination I would have lost while I was out of it. She told me we would just have to plan my recovery based on how I was doing each day, since the normal recovery times for humans didn’t match up with mine. I accepted what she was saying and promised to ask for help when I needed it and take whatever medical advice I was given seriously. I didn’t have any burns from the explosion, but I had a few cuts that had been stitched and bandaged and I was covered with bruises from where I had hit the wall and where things had fallen on me. It hurt to move and breath because I had broken several ribs and I had some small stress fractures in various other places. Including one in my cheekbone just below my right eye, they had guessed it was caused by whatever head trauma had knocked me unconscious. Nearly half my face was covered in a bruise and I had thought that Grey looked like a punching bag while he was in medical. I also had a cast on my leg because I had broken a bone in my ankle. I wiggled my toes again as I got used to the restrictive feeling of the cast on my leg and winced as I felt the pain shoot up my leg. Jemma watched me and turned around to grab my next round of meds. The pills were bitter, but they greatly reduced the amount of discomfort I felt.  
It looked like crutches were going to be my friends for the time being. I got tired of counting stares as I was helped to walk the hallways, Grey on one side of the walker I was using with a steadying hand on the gaiter belt around my waist. We had to be careful not to wear me out enough for him to really need to use the belt, since it would press on my broken ribs when pressure was applied. I had to prove to Jemma that I could hobble around well enough in the walker before she would allow me to switch to crutches, but thankfully I wasn’t in the full cast long before it was taken off and traded for one of those strap on boot things. I threw up everything I tried to eat for the first few days after I woke up, apparently that was to be expected with the medications I was on. Great. At least I was making steady progress towards walking on my own again and the number of pills I was talking would be reduced the more I recovered, so I knew that eventually eating would be worth it. It’s not as fun to eat when you aren’t sure if you will be seeing that food again in an hour or less.  
There were several times where I had to bite my pride down as Grey carried me bridal style back to my room when I had managed to walk too far for me to walk back myself or I had tried to cover too much ground too fast. How he managed to carry me each time without causing extreme pain I still wasn’t sure of. Yeah it was a little uncomfortable while he was picking me up and my muscles shifted across sore spots and cracked bone, but as soon as he had me balanced in his arms, it was like floating on a cushion of air. I still swear that the man is made of solid coated marshmallow. That’s the only way he can be that strong and that soft at the same time. He never minded carrying me back either. He would just wait until I realized that I wasn’t going to make it back on my own and I gave up trying to pretend I was fine. I would tiredly sigh and lean up against the wall or sit on the nearest bench. Then he would just step over, sweep me up and casually move off down the hallway like we did this every day. He never mentioned it either. It was just something that happened, was accepted and then dismissed. He could have teased me over it, or told Jemma that I was doing too much, but he didn’t. Grey would carry me back to my room and one of the other agents would grab my crutches from wherever we had left them, and they would just appear back in my room, sometimes before we even got there. I had a weird network of friends on my side, that was for sure. I was relatively confident that my crutches would beat us back to my room because someone had tipped off Elena, but naturally I couldn’t prove it.  
I gradually got strong enough that being carried happened less and less often, my stamina was coming back, and my bones and muscles were healing. Grey was still by my side through the whole thing, just like he promised he would be. Watching and waiting, ready to catch me if I seemed like I was going to fall and to gently remind me of my limits before I pushed myself too hard. We found ways to make physical therapy fun, he would take me places off base where we could walk on varied terrain and, so that I wouldn’t be staring at the same set of walls the whole time. The fresh air and new scenery made my progress tolerable. It was also nice to stop while we were off base and get food. It was nice to just have the chance to feel normal again. Like I wasn’t stuck on the injured list waiting to be cleared to do the most basic of things. Sure, it might take us forever to make one lap of the park or the store that we had chosen to visit that day, but Grey never complained. I apologized for monopolizing his time and keeping him off missions, but he wouldn’t hear it. He told me missions weren’t as fun without me and that he had some free time saved up and I had given him an excuse to use it.  
“It’s Kitty, or Kit.”  
“What is kitty?” I was confused. We had just been sitting on a park bench, in the dark looking at the stars. There wasn’t much light pollution here, and we had a clear view of the night sky. It was beautiful.  
“My name.” Grey said with a straight face. So, I knew he was being completely serious. “My legal first name is Kitty.”  
“Damn. Unlucky break. How did that happen?” I stopped looking at the sky and turned to face him. I could see him clearly, even in the dark. He looked relaxed, but his chin was still turned up as he surveyed the distant lights cast out by the stars. I knew he could see in the dark almost as well as I could. Neither one of us had commented on it yet. I guess we just weren’t ready to discuss how not human we both clearly were.  
“The orphanage that found me, I was found by the kids there. They thought they heard kittens and found a baby instead.”  
“And here I thought you were more dog than cat.” I prodded his side gently. He laughed softly at my comment. He was always so quick to smile and laugh that it was easy to forget that he also had a past, just like everyone else did.  
“I’m sure your assessment isn’t wrong, or at least not far from it.” He mused.  
“I’ve been wrong about things before.”  
“It happens to the best of us.” His voice was without judgement. He was simply stating a fact.  
“I didn’t want to join SHIELD.” I confessed. “I was doing fine on my own, or at least I figured I was. I’m just so used to relying on myself. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt just because they were associated with me.”  
“You and Daisy are peas in a pod.”  
“She’s the reason I joined. We knew each other before, back when she was human.” I paused. “I was a contact for her when she was with The Rising Tide.”  
“That explains a lot.”  
I didn’t have anything more I wanted to say on that subject. So, I fell silent. Grey just accepted that as quickly as he accepted everything else. He knew I would talk when I was ready, but that had been the closest either of us had come to talking about what made us different than the standard issue humans. I knew that the subject would come up again. I just hoped that when it did, I would have some of Jemma’s science to back up what I knew. It was irritating that it was taking so long to find answers now that I was really looking for them. All those years, I didn’t care, it didn’t matter, and now it was out of my reach because the science hadn’t caught up with it yet. That’s what Jemma had told me. She said we had to wait until the science caught up to know. I huffed out my breath and Grey gave me a quizzical look. Now he looked like a dog again, he looked like a confused puppy. I wasn’t going to be able to figure this guy out. I was just going to have to wait until he told me.  
“I’m just annoyed with science.” I answered his look.  
“Ah.” That was all he said.  
I pulled myself up onto my crutches and began to pick my way back through the sticks and grass to the path, so we could head over to where the Quinjet was parked. We had asked permission, then flown the jet out here ourselves. That way SHIELD wasn’t down three agents just, so we could look at the stars in a clear, dark night sky. They could spare the two of us and one jet without compromising anything and there was no reason to make our outing a group picnic.  
The crutches made no noise, even on the path. I had taped all the parts that moved so that I didn’t have to listen to the constant clicking anytime I wanted to go somewhere. I called them my tactical crutches and I could sneak up on just about anyone with them. Grey walked even with me on the path, giving me enough room to get a good span with my crutches, but staying close enough to intervene should I lose my balance or hit an uneven patch and drop a crutch. I could balance well enough without them, but if you are expecting something to take your weight and it is suddenly gone things get far more complicated. We made it back to the jet without incident though and we settled into the cockpit and pulled on the headsets to begin our flight back to base.  
We hadn’t missed anything while we were gone. The world had kept turning and everyone was doing what they normally do. I thanked Grey for going with me and retired to my room for the night. It would be nice to be done with these sticks and this boot, but for now I would just have to suck it up and deal with it. One day at a time, like I always do. I decided that I was due for another soak in the hot tub. The good thing about wearing the boot instead of the cast was I could take it off. I had worked that little fact out early on, as soon as I could be out of a hard cast, or if I could avoid one entirely I would. Then I wouldn’t have to change as much about my grooming routines. Having to avoid water was annoying and hard casts are also just so itchy. That was another place where I refused to wait for science to catch up. Sure, it had advanced as far as boots and removable casts, but for people who broke easier and didn’t heal as fast as me there needed to be better alternatives than being trapped in a plaster prison until their bones mended enough to be trusted. Human bodies were just so fragile.  
I was free of the crutches. That was awesome, however Jemma demanded that I keep wearing the boot for the time being. She wanted to make completely sure that the bone in my ankle had healed properly before she ‘let me start doing stupid stuff on it again.’ I do agree that getting blown up is a stupid thing to do, but it’s not like I did it on purpose. It’s not like I go out and say, hey I haven’t been blown up in a while, then jump on a pile of explosives.  
Okay, so I was probably just getting antsy because I couldn’t train at all while I was on crutches and wearing the boot. I still wasn’t going to be allowed to train until I was freed from this damn thing. It was driving me crazy. I needed to be able to move, to stretch and use my muscles. Why wasn’t this bone healing as fast as I normally would. I was even taking those stupid bone pills. I huffed and flopped down on a couch in the lounge harder than normal. I got a few stares, but no one commented on my actions. I glared at everyone anyway and they quickly cleared the room. I laid back, placing my head against the top of the couch and stared at the ceiling for a while before I simply closed my eyes. I knew I was being dramatic and bitchy, but I just couldn’t help myself. I listened to the normal hum of the base and tried to calm myself down. It was harder to do when I couldn’t hit anything or go for a run. I registered a set of familiar footfalls approaching the lounge, but I didn’t move from my position. I heard the footsteps pause for a second in the door. Probably looking me over and deciding if it was wise to join me. It wasn’t, but he did anyway.  
Grey sat down on the couch next to me. He managed to do it without touching me at all, or forcing me to shift my position. A ballerina. He was a big ass ballerina. Sparring with me had made him faster, but he had always been able to delicately place his weight wherever he wanted to. I squeezed my eyes shut harder as a tear escaped the edge of one eyelid and ran down into my hairline. I tried to keep my breathing steady, but I knew that Grey was aware that I was crying. Bless him though, because he sure wasn’t going to comment on it. Someone else tried to come into the room and Grey shooed them away. He just sat there next to me, waiting for me to get my shit together enough to talk to him, or to even look at him. I drew my attention in from the thrum of the entire base until I was completely focused on the couch, on Grey. I focused on listening to his slow, steady heartbeat. I let it become the only thing in my mind. I knew that much like a cornered animal I just needed a steady influence to find peace. Grey knew it too and he was so, so very good at being that steady influence. Much like when he was stuck in medical and going crazy, I was there for him as silent steady support. He was repaying me fully. It’s amazing what just knowing that I’m not alone, that I don’t have to take on the whole world by myself can do for my mental health.   
Grey slipped an arm behind my neck as I started to relax and pulled me in close to him. I curled into a ball on his lap, tucking my face in next to his chin. He wrapped one arm around my shoulders and looped the other around my knees as I pulled them up to my chest.  
“Thanks.” I mumbled against his skin.  
“I told you. Anytime. I’ve got you. It’s going to be okay.” His voice rumbled softly in his chest beneath my ear and he gave me a gentle squeeze as he spoke.  
“I’m going crazy in this damn boot.”  
“I knew you would, but you’ll be out if it in no time and kicking my ass again. You’ll see.” There was his natural confidence. It followed him everywhere.  
“So where did the name Grey come from?”  
“When I was old enough, I picked it as my middle name. I wanted to change my full name but decided to just deal with it.”  
“So, you nearly pulled a Daisy.”  
“What?”  
“She named herself Skye, the name the orphanage gave her was horrible. She became Daisy after she found her parents So we both share similarities with her if I think about it.”  
“Yeah, I guess so.”  
I continued to sit there, curled up in his lap. I had asked him if he would cuddle with me, and he had agreed, but I had never really taken him up on it that often. So much had happened right after we had that conversation that we just never really had time. Now I knew though, this man was an amazing cuddler. I was now sorely wishing that I had started cuddling with him sooner. I could feel the tension melting out of my body with every breath. I relaxed so much that I fell asleep. I’m sure that Grey was not at all surprised by this development. With how much time we had spent together over the past few weeks he knew what I was like when I was worn out. He must have carried me back to my room like that, because I woke up the next morning in my room, curled up in my bed. My boot was on the floor next to the bed, it was safe enough to sleep without it. In classic Grey style I was still fully dressed though, so I was a little tied up in my clothes. I was also going to have pressure lines from the seams.  
It took some careful well-thought out maneuvering to unwrap myself. I had managed to tie myself up in both my clothes and my blankets overnight. I must have tossed and turned quite a bit after Grey tucked me in. After extracting myself from my blanket prison, I changed out of yesterday’s clothes. I opted to skip a shower, I knew I smelled fine and I didn’t feel gross. I could take one later without offending anyone I was around today. That was the only bonus of not being able to do much. I stayed clean way longer than I would normally. I got dressed and strapped myself into my boot. Since I was unable to go out into the field, it was my turn to work the back end of missions. I wasn’t as useful in the lab as Grey, so I was assigned to a computer. My contact with The Rising Tide made me a highly effective researcher and I could hack just as well as, if not better than Daisy.  
“I don’t know if we should let the two of you go on missions together anymore.” Daisy mused as she sat down at the computer with me.  
“Why not?”  
“First Grey comes back in shreds, then you get blown up.”  
“It’s not an adventure if you don’t nearly die.” I quipped smiling.  
“You’re not selling me on this idea.”  
“No, I suppose that I am really not. It’s almost like you want to keep me around or something.”  
Daisy smiled at me and gripped my shoulder before she left to go on her mission. It was interesting to be watching her work from this side of the screen. I fed her intel as I could, as mostly just hoped that everything went smoothly. Now I knew how the agents felt that quarterbacked the missions I went on with Grey. All my fretting was for nothing however and everyone came back safe.  
Jemma made me promise to be careful how I moved my leg but cleared me to exercise. I still had to wear the stupid boot, but at least I could do things again. I knew that it would be easy enough to balance on the boot and wail on the punching bag or do just about any upper body workout to start getting my muscle tone back. I just wasn’t allowed to do anything that would affect the muscles that ran down to my ankle. It was irritating that this bone was taking so long to heal compared to how fast I normally recover, but I guess it just gave me an idea of what it was like to be more human.  
Grey walked into the training room to find me drenched in sweat beating the tar out of the punching bag. It felt so good to be able to move that I was just giving it my all, short of breaking the bag that is. It was way too difficult to try to pick up a bag off the floor and not use my ankle. I wanted to avoid that if possible.   
“I’m glad I’m not that bag.”  
I stopped punching the bag and backed against the wall, sliding down to sit on the floor. I was sure I left a sweat streak down the wall. I had made myself quite messy. Now I really needed a shower. Grey looked even larger from my place on the floor.  
“Yeah. I might have over-done it. Maybe, just a little.”  
“Just a bit. The wall is wet now.”  
“I wondered if it would be. I’ll wipe it down in a minute. For now, I’m just going to sit here.”  
“Mind if I join you?”  
“Sure, pull up a patch of floor. It’s actually not too uncomfortable.”  
Grey dropped to the floor in front of me and scooted around until his back was against the wall. He held up a towel for me and I gladly accepted it. I did a basic job of cleaning myself up and I turned to face him. That’s when I noticed that he had quite the bruise on his face, right around his eye.  
“What the hell happened to you?”  
“I lost a bet with Daisy.” He commented.  
“What bet would that be?”  
“I bet I can clear that ditch.”  
I snorted as I started to laugh. “And you landed on your face?”  
“It wasn’t a graceful landing, that is for sure.”  
I would have paid money to see that, if I was being honest. He looked so sheepish telling me this story, that I couldn’t help but to tip over laughing. Grey just sat there watching my merriment with a grin on his face. He just knew that he was going to be the butt of the jokes on base for a while after this, and he seemed to have accepted his fate willingly. He patiently waited for me to collect myself and as I gradually got control of my laughing I shifted back to a sitting position. Now that I was cooling off it was becoming more important to me to get up and go take a shower. I was beginning to feel sticky.  
“Uh, could I bother you for a hand up? I need to go shower, I’m gross.”  
“Sure,” Grey said standing to offer me a hand. “I don’t think you’re gross though.”  
I huffed at him as he carefully pulled me to my feet putting all my weight on my good leg as I stood. Once I was up and sturdy, I allowed myself to redistribute my weight between both legs and I went off to clean up. A shower was much more satisfying when you were all sweaty from working out.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, roughly as far as I have gotten. The story will continue, but how will it go? I have no idea.

I stood in the kitchen area of the lounge wearing frumpy clothing. I was hungry, which is no surprise really, and I was breaking down a stalk of brussels sprouts. I was going to make a veggie stir fry and I had bogarted all the fresh vegetables that were in the fridges. Most veggies came onto this base to die anyway, if the agents didn’t get the chance to make real food or were simply too tired after missions there were heaps of food from the fridges that would just have to be thrown out. Anything we caught before the expiration dates would be donated to the local shelters that would accept food gifts. So, this was a rare, but happy moment for me. To be able to prep real food, even if I was only able too because a had a few more days in this damn boot.  
I heard some light footsteps coming up behind me that I recognized, there was no way that they belonged here though. I turned from my food prep just in time to see Elle coming through the door with Grey behind her. He looked so smug that I could have slapped him, if it weren’t for the gift, he had just given me. I wobbled my way towards the door and managed to meet Elle halfway into the room. Ignoring my boot, I swept her up and spun her around in a tight hug.  
“I can’t believe you’re actually here! I’m so happy to see you!” Not going to lie, I may have squealed.  
“I just had to see you, and tell you the news in person?”  
I set her down gently, “what news?”  
“I’m getting married!” She squeaked, tears of happiness in her eyes as she watched my face carefully for my reaction.  
“Hey! Cheers!” I said, truly happy for her. “Who’s the lucky person?”  
“Her name is Tamera; she works for an advertising agency. You’d like her.”  
“That’s awesome Elle, so long as you’re happy, I’m happy.”  
Elle smiled at me. “I really am, very happy.”  
“Good. So, when is the wedding?”  
“We actually haven’t set a date yet, she’s just got a new job, so we’re waiting for that all to be sorted out before we set dates. I promise you will be the first to know.”  
I smiled as I hugged her again. “However, you need to do it, just keep me informed. I will move the world if I have to, so I can be there.” I pulled back and gazed into her eyes. “That is a promise.”  
Grey was watching us from the door, a look of fondness graced his features. He knew that he had done a good thing, making this happen for me, and surprising me with it. I searched his face as Elle and I broke apart.  
“Are you going to be able to stay for dinner? It’s my raided the pantry veggie stir fry. There will be enough for several people.” I looked between the two of them. It was hard to know how long Elle was going to be able to be here and I wanted to make sure that Grey knew that he was invited to join me because I was about to make enough food to feed an army. I don’t know that I can cook small amounts of food well. I always make enough to last a few days, even for someone who eats as much as I do. It just made life simpler to batch cook.  
“I’m clear for the weekend, unless I need to be flown back sooner to get out of the way here…” Elle looked between the two of us, then pointedly at my boot. “Grey told me you got hurt.”  
“Yeah, I kind of got blown up. A little.”  
Elle swatted me, but it had no force behind it at all. “I told you to be careful! Blown up is the opposite of careful!”  
“I’m alive, and whole, aren’t I? I had good back-up.” I jerked my chin at Grey. Elle nodded and grinned at me. I knew exactly what I would be getting quizzed about tonight. “You can crash in my room. I have a good-sized bed or a couch if your fiancée isn’t okay with our prior arrangements.”  
“She knows, she isn’t worried about it.”  
“Yeah, I’m not about to steal anyone’s significant other with my looks” I mused dryly.  
Elle swatted me harder this time and Grey suppressed a snort.  
“What” I looked at her innocently. That was a look I was well practiced at. “I’m hideous.” I said deadpan.  
With that last comment Elle and Grey were both laughing. I had added an accent to my words that told them I was repeating something stupid, likely that was said to me in a bar once after turning down a guy’s advances. It’s amazing how quickly you can get labeled as ugly, when they were just hitting on you ten seconds before. I’m not sure I will ever understand men in general. There were just so many contradictory things that they did. I watched Grey as he laughed with Elle. He seemed different, but then they all did at first. I just wasn’t sure about anything anymore. I am happy for Elle, I knew that we were never going to be a permanent thing, but at the same time, she had moved on. She was getting married. That was all kinds of final that I just didn’t know if I had in me, or anywhere in my future. I wasn’t even sure I wanted it.  
I turned back to my food prep and quickly got everything chopped up with the added knife skills of both Grey and Elle. If we wanted to open a restaurant we could, we worked well together, the three of us. We could have made an amazing group of short order cooks. Too bad more we were all busy trying to save some small part of the world and couldn’t ever have a job like that. Cooking didn’t lend itself to the superhero business. Yeah, sure, we had to eat, but our schedules were way to hectic for anything like that.  
More and more agents drifted in as they smelled the food. We just pointed them towards the industrial sized pots near the stove that had steaming heaps of food still piled in them. There was no harm in taking pleasure in the simple things in life. Like cooking for a group of people. We got mumbled thanks, through mouthfuls of food. Which I still say is one of the best compliments a chef can get. Manners be damned in this case. I’d forgive them. It was good food.  
I opted out of training after dinner. Grey wasn’t surprised, and he told me he would see me tomorrow. Elle and I headed back to my room, for what I knew would be several hours of her questioning me intensely about what had happened since we last talked, and what exactly was going on between me and my partner. It would be easy enough to tell her what I could about missions, even the mission where Grey got hurt, and the one where I got blown up. What was going to be far more complicated, even between the two of us, was to tell her what was going on between Grey and me. Because in truth, I have no fucking idea.  
Elle slept on the bed, next to me. I mostly laid there, watching and listening to her sleep. I could be happy for her, and sad for us at the same time. She had always told me that all my feelings were valid, no matter how ridiculous they might feel at the time. I wasn’t going to worry her with them though. I would just have to sort this out on my own time. Which I knew I would still have plenty of before I had to go to the wedding. I had no issues with that either. Elle was my friend, first and foremost, and making sure that things that she cared about went off exactly how she wanted them to be was something I enjoyed doing for her. She had told me that she dated, between the last time we saw each other and when she met Tam, but she wouldn’t tell me who. Just that it didn’t work out, then she met Tamera at the bar and they had hit it off. I finally rolled over and let myself drift off, so that I could have at least some sleep before Grey and I met on the mat again for the first time in weeks. It had been another hard-won concession from Jemma, to let me start sparring tomorrow, before the boot officially came off, but she had finally relented, stating that it could be a test run and I was to come to the lab for x-rays after the match. I had agreed to that willingly, since it meant that I got what I wanted. I guess that meant that Elle would get to see us in action, then maybe I could ask her what the hell was going on between Grey and me. She had a keen eye and I trusted her judgement explicitly.  
Elle and I woke to my alarm, and after some prying, I was able to get her out of bed and dressed. She never was a morning person. Probably one of the reasons she preferred jobs at bars. The later hours just suited her personality so much better. I led the grumpy Elle into the lounge to get some coffee into her, so she could be awake enough to watch us spar. Then I lead her to the training room, where Grey was already getting warmed up.  
“No fair getting a head start.”  
“You should have been here earlier.”  
I just smiled at him and tilted my head towards Elle, who glared at both of us.  
“Being up this early is not natural.” She mumbled and made herself a nest on one of the benches facing the mats.  
“Let me get warmed up, then we will see how bad this goes.”  
“Oh, I won’t kick your ass too hard, just enough to get you back from when I was on the injured list.”  
“Ha-ha, ha-ha.” I added dryly. “I held back you know.”  
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be good.” Grey relented, looking me square in the face. That unreadable emotion was there again. “You always hold back. It will be nice to spar when neither of us are broken so we can actually get a good workout again.”  
I met his eyes, but I didn’t respond. His comment clearly meant that he had known the whole time we had been partners I had held back around him. I should have known he would be that perceptive. Nothing about this man was average, but at the same time I didn’t want to hurt him. Guess we would just have to see what happened when we were both cleared to go full out, like he said. If we did spar full out I would have us go somewhere it wouldn’t be caught on camera though. That should remove any concerns that either of us might have. The longer I spent around him the more I was sure that my initial assumption was right. He wasn’t human either.  
It was a tad tricky, being able to spar effectively without torqueing my ankle or hitting Grey with the boot, but we managed it. Elle was doing her best referee impression from the bench as she watched us fight. I was out of shape, but not as bad as I expected. I wasn’t sure what I would have to work with since I had been healing funny ever since I came to base. I would need to get to the bottom of that too. Nothing had ever changed my healing factor before, but I was starting to notice that I was indeed taking longer to heal here and getting injured more easily. Though some of the injuries were still on par with what would have happened had I experienced those same circumstances somewhere else. It was very confusing. I had a lot that I needed to think about and talk through with someone. I wasn’t sure if I could drop all that on Elle, since she was going to be leaving soon and had other things to worry about. Grey would be one of my next choices, he had never given me a reason not to trust him. If I didn’t talk to him about it I would talk to Daisy. Grey might have more direct insight though since we have been together pretty much the whole time I have been on base.  
Grey and I wrapped up our sparring session and I left him to do his other exercising while I went to clean up and spend more time with Elle. She was going to have to leave tonight, she had her own life and her own problems to sort out. I didn’t need to add mine to them, especially since she would worry, and I didn’t know if it was worth worrying about just yet. I never panic unless I know I should panic. Then I panic, and I panic well.  
I dropped a chip containing a direct way to contact me wherever into a make-up container and packed it with Elle’s day bag. Then I helped her carry her bags to the Quinjet. I sat down in the cockpit next to Grey and we began out preflight check list. One more day in the boot, but I could at least still fly. I decided that I would talk to Grey when we landed in New York and escorted Elle home. I wanted to make sure she made it safely and that she found the chip. I needed her to have a guaranteed way to get in touch with me, and I wanted the same from her. That chip would provide both of those. It was tapped into a special link on my comms, that I put there myself. Instant direct line out of base, worry free, just add outside contact.  
Grey and I carried Elle’s bags into her apartment, I gave her one last long hug and then we began our walk back to the jet.  
I lagged a little, Grey slowed down to look at me. Eyes dropping to the boot, asking if I’d done too much.  
“You know I’m not human.” I stated simply as we kept walking.  
“I do, what’s this about.”  
“A couple of things, one I’m still working on, but the other is that if we spar full out, no holds barred, we do it off base away from surveillance.”  
“Okay, I can accept that. What is the other thing?”  
“I’m not healing as fast as normal. Haven’t been since shortly after I got on base.”  
Grey stopped walking and turned to face me. “What?”  
“This,” I indicated towards myself, “should have never taken this long.”  
“I thought something was off, you had healed so much faster when you broke your arm.”  
“Exactly. That was my normal healing rate. This ankle should have been healed by now. Muscles and bruises were always weird, but the bone should have fused in a few days since there was no major separation.”  
“You said you were still working on it, so what have you come up with so far.”  
“Not much, if I’m honest and I plan to be when it comes to you.” I paused for emphasis. “That is why I wanted to talk to you, we’ve basically been side by side since I got on base, so I was hoping you would have an idea of where to start.”  
“What has changed since you noticed this? Did it start before or after all that testing you were doing in the lab?”  
I gave him a wide-eyed look. “After.” We said at the same time.  
“Who all have you seen for that? I doubt it would be Fitz or Simmons, at least not knowingly.”  
“I agree, so it has to be one of the techs working with them. I’m not sure who, or what they have done. So, it is hard to decide how to fight back.”  
“We will start with your food and water intake, that is the easiest way to continually modify someone, you haven’t been getting regular injections or anything like that, right?”  
“Correct.”  
“So, we have a game plan.”  
“Yes, yes, we do, and it starts right now.” I added, a touch of anger in my voice.  
Grey nodded and we continued walking to the jet. There were a handful of people that I knew for sure I could trust on the base, everyone else would have to be investigated and I would have to do it quietly. I didn’t want to take this information anywhere until I had proof. I didn’t want to risk whoever it was running, or worse. It was hard to say what they were intending to do, or why they were doing it, but I felt confident that with Grey on my side, we would find out sooner or later. It turned out to be sooner.  
I was free of my boot, but I was suspicious of everyone and everything. This was no way to live. We needed to figure this out, and soon. Food and drinks were screened and never left unattended; Grey was never far away from me. Watching me and those around me like a hawk. The remaining injuries I had started healing faster. We had clearly found the way I was being dosed and blocked it. Now the question became who, and with what. I didn’t want to go to Jemma to have my blood tested because that would raise flags. We needed to use old school stealth to get this person. So, we decided to lay a trap. We placed some of my favorite food in the fridge, clearly labeled as mine, then slipped out of sight to wait. They must have been getting desperate, because we didn’t have to wait very long.  
It was a lab tech that I recognized as new, but he was also one that had been present in the blind testing done on me by Jemma. He must have done the extra leg work to figure out who the samples they were working on were from. Why he was doing it, hopefully we would find out soon. He opened the fridge, clearly trying to be fast and silent and dumped something into the staged leftovers. Grey was on him before I had even recovered from my shock and anger. I ran into the room just as Grey pinned him to the wall with one hand on his chest.  
“You had better start talking, right now.” Grey growled. Now he sounded and looked every bit the wolf I had seen the first day we fought. His pale gray eyes were narrowed, and his teeth were bared in a snarl. The hair on the back of my neck stood up, and I hurried over to prevent Grey from just killing the man. We needed information; it was hard to get that from a body. Hard, not impossible, but still, it would be easier to explain what happened if we didn’t have a dead tech on our hands.  
“Grey,” I said, my voice mellow, “we need him alive.”  
Grey lowered the man back onto his feet but didn’t loosen the grip he had on the lab coat. The fabric was bunched together in one of Grey’s large fists and the other was cocked back and ready to strike if the tech tried to fight at all. He wasn’t going to though, he looked like he was about to faint. Daisy and Coulson came running in, having been alerted to the commotion. They both stopped in the doorway, looks of confusion on their faces as they looked between the three of us.  
“He’s been poisoning her.” Grey spat, never removing his eyes from the man.  
Now it was Daisy and Coulson’s turn to look furious. They walked into the kitchen to stand level with us. The man slowly sank further back. It was clear he never expected to be caught.  
“She’s… she’s not human! She doesn’t belong here; she doesn’t belong on this planet!” He whimpered.  
“Most of your audience today isn’t exactly human.” Coulson replied smoothly. “You might want to watch what you say.”  
“She’s not even from this planet. Her DNA is all wrong. They were supposed to be blind samples, but with agents regularly coming in injured it was easy for me to narrow down who my target was.”  
He was starting to sound surer of himself as he spoke. “I had deleted the original samples, hidden what I had found. I reported that there was nothing more we could test. I knew as soon as I saw the results who my target here was, who I was sent to kill. I couldn’t understand why the poison hadn’t killed her yet.” He glared at me, like this was all my fault.  
“Who sent you.” Daisy was seething, her rich brown eyes were lit with rage.  
“You’ll never know!” He shouted and yanked hard in Grey’s grip as he smashed his own face into the wall. He was dead, probably from whatever poison he had been using on me, before he even hit the ground.  
We all just kind of stood there, looking at him and each other. Completely and totally shocked.  
I was the first to speak. “Well, that was new.”  
“We should take you to have your blood tested now, maybe we can narrow down what he was trying to use on you.” Grey grabbed the poisoned food from the fridge and began walking towards the lab.  
We all murmured our agreement and followed him out.  
‘I will never say that my life isn’t interesting.’ I mused as I watched Grey stride into the lab, body loosely held in one hand, tray of leftovers in the other. We were met by an open-mouthed group of techs and a concerned looking Jemma. Fitz wasn’t far behind her.  
“What on Earth as happened here?”  
“What indeed.” I said, looking down at the body Grey had just dropped unceremoniously on the floor of the lab. “He has a poison in his system, the same one might be in that food. He had been using it on me. Apparently, the goal was to kill, because I’m not human. He messed with the test results.”  
More stunned silence. Not surprising. They had all been working with this man, seeing him every day, and now they knew more than they ever wanted to know about him. Shock was the correct response in situations like this. I watched everyone for signs that the shock was faked, that this man might have had help, but everyone I looked at was truly horrified at what he had tried to do, what he had done. That was good, terrorists were easier to deal with then they did the missions alone. Yet, he clearly answered to someone, someone had given him a mission, and told him where to carry it out. That was something we would have to deal with as well.  
I sighed. We would also have to repeat the tests that we had done. Maybe my answers were out there, and we just didn’t find them because the test was altered. I refused to get my hopes up again. It was possible that the science still wasn’t caught up yet, or any number of factors could still come between me and the truth. Daisy stepped forward and draped an arm around my shoulders, she then turned me and steered me back to my room. Grey and Coulson trailed behind her. They were talking, but I couldn’t focus enough to make out what they were saying. It just didn’t seem that important to me. That man had been trying to kill me, just because I am me. Mindless hate. I never knew what to do with that. Everyone piled into my room, where Daisy sat me down on my bed. Jemma trailed in, not long after the guys. She had a folder in her hands.  
“This is what the instant tests showed. He truly didn’t understand non-human biology, which saved your life.”  
“Thank the Goddess for small favors.” I mumbled.  
“Yes, well the poison appears to be leaving your system at your standard healing rate and you should be fit as the proverbial fiddle in no time.” She said, the smile on her face filled her voice. “There don’t seem to be any lasting side-affects, but I want you to come in daily for more tests until the rest of the compound has cleared your system.”  
“Thanks Jemma, that sounds fair.”  
She squeezed my hand and left the room. Coulson left behind her and I was alone with Daisy and Grey.  
“Join SHIELD you said, it will be fun, you said.” I was looking at Daisy. I wasn’t angry though, not at her. She just as easily could have been his target. “Why me though? There are more obvious non-humans here, no offense.”  
“None taken, that part doesn’t make a lot of sense to me either. I guess we will have to see what the actual tests say about you.” Daisy replied. “He was ranting that the DNA was completely wrong. I know that mine still has human markers, it just has way more. I wonder what that means for you.”  
“That makes two of us.”  
“Three of us.” Grey finally spoke up since joining us in my room. “That is, if you don’t mind me knowing.”  
“Of course, I don’t mind.” I told him. “You’ve been nothing but helpful through this whole thing. You believed me when I wasn’t even sure myself. You helped do this, I probably owe you my life.”  
“I’d say were even at this point.” Grey said smiling. “But I’m not counting.”  
We all laughed at that.  
I had a lot of things to process but going through my normal routine helped. Since I was finally out of the boot I was feeling better in general. Even if I had to head down to the lab before I started my day, so they could pull more blood. It had barely been a day since we knew for sure I was being poisoned, which made todays testing logical and acceptable to me. My healing rate had picked back up, and I was going to start actively training again. It was easier to find the positives now than it was before. Grey and I would be kept up to date with whatever the other agents found on missions pertaining to the crazy tech, but unless necessary neither of us were going to be working that case. On one hand I found that highly annoying, on the other hand I understood the reasoning behind it. Grey had nearly torn the guy apart, and I wasn’t far behind him if I was being completely honest.  
Jemma calculated that the poison might remain in my system for a few more days, and that we could skip testing tomorrow and instead follow up the day after. Unless I had any symptoms, I was cleared to return to modified duty. Full duty would have to wait until Grey and I had a few more rounds on the mat, just to make sure that I was back into fighting shape. The last thing I needed was to go out on a mission and be a liability. That was never going to happen, not on my watch. I could be patient about fieldwork for a few more days. At least I had something, someone, I could take my frustrations out on. That he wanted it that way helped ease my mind some.  
I met Grey in the training room. He watched me walk in, it was like he was still looking for any sudden change in my status. Like I might still just tip over. That’s annoying.  
“Would it make you feel better if I kicked your ass?” I grumbled.  
“Actually? Yes, it would.” Grey said. “It would prove that you’re, well, you.”  
So, I tackled him to the mat, with no warning at all. I hope that he had warmed up before I got there, because I had no plans to give any ground back to him. Naturally I was still a tad rusty, so he wasn’t in any danger, but it felt great to be uninhibited by that stupid boot, pain or (much) poison. I was beginning to feel more like myself again. The power and life surged through my body as we moved. Grey was matching me blow for blow and he looked like he was enjoying this just as much as I was. I began to tire though, and I faltered, leaving an opening in my defenses. Grey leapt on it and locked his leg behind mine, yanking my feet out from under me. Unable to do more than brace for impact, I let myself fall to the mat. I rolled a little to spread out my momentum, before coming to a stop. I laid there, flat on my back with my arms out to my sides, I was panting and covered in a sheen of sweat.  
“I’m not likely to get an opening like that again, am I?” Grey was also breathing hard and his gym clothes were soaked through with sweat.  
“Not if I can help it.”  
“Damn, but that was fun though. I swear, you rolled over mid-air to get a better landing. You’re such a cat.”  
“Guilty as charged.” I breathed, still trying to fully catch my breath.  
Grey flopped down on the mat next to me with a wet dull thud.  
“Ew, I think you got some sweat on me.”  
He wiped his face and reached over to wipe it on me. I squeaked and rolled out of the way. We laid there, laughing like idiots for a few minutes, which made it even more difficult for either of us to catch our breath.  
Sometimes a good fight is all you need to make you feel alive again. It was pure, albeit very sweaty, bliss. A full strength, no holds barred match between the two of you was likely to be a sight to be seen. I have no plans of letting anyone see it though. At least not the first, probably few, times. Not until we had a full understanding of each other. Then maybe a select few could see.  
I still wished it was easier to figure out what I was. It was possible that this might need to be something that Bruce Banner and Tony Stark were brought in on. Not that adding more people to the list of full access to your files made you feel good; it might be a necessary evil. Ok, calling it evil might be a tad much. I’d talk to Jemma about it in the morning.  
Once I got my giggle fit under control, I rolled on my side to look at Grey. The laughter still shown in his eyes as he maneuvered to grab us towels. He threw one at my face and I snatched it out of the air.  
“Uh oh.” I commented noticing the line of red on his lips. “I broke your pretty face” 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens in New York always comes back to New York?

Jemma was cautiously excited to get to collaborate with Banner and Stark. She hadn’t been sure at first about my idea to bring them in, since it was always dangerous adding more places that intel on me went, but I could tell she wanted to pick their brains about so many things that it ultimately was an easy sell. It’s not that we worried that they, or any of the other Avengers would leak anything. But we had seen plenty of proof over the years that no system was tamper proof.  
It didn’t matter as much to me at this point. Someone was clearly after me for things I didn’t know about. The time for extreme caution and paranoia had passed. It was time to call in the big guns. Of course, I had no way of knowing if whoever was after me knew who or what I was, but I knew that if I didn’t find out it put me at a disadvantage. Being the underdog is only fun when it won’t cost you or your friends their lives.  
The tests we had re-run in the lab, the ones that the results had been deleted, just left us with more questions than answers. It was clear that I had some human DNA, possibly a mix of human and mutant, so at least one of my parents had, at minimum, a dormant gene for mutant abilities. The rest, that’s where talking to Bruce and Tony would come in.  
The group flying out to the Avengers Compound was small, Fitz and Daisy stayed behind, but I had Jemma and Grey with me. I had told him he didn’t have to come, but he just gave me the we’re partners speech, and that of my choice of second pilots, who else would I want. When he put it that way, I agreed with him, there was no telling if I’d need to stay with the avengers for a while and I couldn’t leave Jemma without a ride home. Not that something else couldn’t be arranged if necessary, but either way, I wasn’t getting rid of Grey anytime soon. It was nice to have someone always wanting to know where I am.  
The flight was uneventful, we landed without fan fair and the man waiting just off the landing pad introduced himself as Happy, head of security for the compound. I fought rolling my eyes at a vanilla human overseeing security for the Avengers but knew there was no way he got that job without having earned it. We had sent data packets ahead over secure line with what we had found so that it wouldn’t be a completely blank slate to start with. We also had a case of samples in a high tech cooler and obviously me, the source of the samples. Seemed like a pretty sure way to learn anything we possibly could.  
It felt both weird and right that we had come back to New York for more answers about me, even if this was a trip to upstate New York instead of New York City. It wasn’t my fault that by the time we had decided to call in the science side of the Avengers they were no longer based out of Stark/Avengers tower. That was just politics and semantics anyway, right? I knew firsthand how hard it was to have some level of privacy, even in the middle of a city so large a single person is a drop of water in the ocean. The notoriety of the Avengers and even Stark himself took away much of the invisibility I had enjoyed. They couldn’t just mindlessly wonder the streets; they would be recognized. Part of me was starting to get concerned that by involving them in my search I would be stepping from the shadows into the light and thus have a similar fate, but the rest of me knew it was a risk worth taking.  
I needed to know, I needed to know who or what I was, I needed to know why I was being hunted. Sure, I had made myself a pain in the ass to lots of people over the years, but it shouldn’t have ever been enough to paint a target on me. Aside from the ‘you’re not human’ target that gets slapped on most strange people on this planet. Gods humans had a weird way of dealing with things they didn’t understand. Even while they were singing our praises and needed rescued, they were eying us suspiciously and trying to control or even kill us. No good deed goes unpunished I guessed.  
Happy lead our rag-tag little group inside one of the larger buildings, I let my eyes flow over everything, just taking in details. I was wearing my hearing aids and had them tuned to nearly human levels. I didn’t feel like being able to hear if Stark had a pest problem, and I wasn’t too concerned about needing to detect any incoming attacks.  
After traveling through a maze of hallways, each of which had crisp signs dictating a name and general use, along with labels next to every door that lead off of the halls into rooms or other areas of the compound, Happy finally slowed his pace and stopped next to a room simply labeled ‘Rec’, but someone had taken tape and made it way ‘Wreck’. I snickered and Happy sighed and smiled at me. He clearly had seen the sign; yet hadn’t changed it for whatever reason.  
Inside the room, which was laid out like a simple lounge, with a verity of chairs, some small tables and a couple televisions sat Tony, Bruce and Steve. They all stopped talking to look at the door when they heard the voices and footsteps approaching. Bruce looked tired, but not unhappy, Tony looked smug and Steve just looked friendly. If I had to guess Steve was just mediating a discussion of some kind between the science bros, it’s not that Bruce can’t handle Tony, but even I know that when approaching some problems works better with more eyes. Which is why I was here.  
“I will just leave you all to it” Happy commented as he turned and strode back down the hall.  
I smiled, “Hi boys, I’m your new science experiment”  
I let out an ‘oof’ of air when Jemma elbowed me, Grey glared, and Tony, Bruce and I laughed. Steve just shook his head as he appraised our little group of misfits. It did not take any real introductions for him to know which of us were the fighters. Not that Jemma could not hold her own, she could be downright scary in the right circumstances, but she still did not have the level of training, or the level of predator that Grey and I just exuded wherever we went.  
“That’s Jemma Simmons, bio-chem,” I supplied pointing at her, “and that wad of muscles is Agent Grey” I finished my introductions while pretending to rub my ribs as if Jemma had landed a hard enough blow to actually hurt me. The corner of Grey’s mouth twitched up a little at my description of him even as he rolled his eyes. No one ever said I wasn’t charming.   
“You obviously know who we are” Tony sassed, waving his hand in a grand gesture towards Steve and Bruce.   
“Eh I might have some idea” I mused as I walked over to shake hands with all of them, starting with Bruce. Jemma was excitedly babbling with Bruce as soon as I had shaken his hand and moved my way down the line. Grey merely moved over to lean against the wall, his eyes taking in the whole room as he slipped into bodyguard mode. I made a point to ignore him. I knew no one in the room was a direct threat to me, not that I couldn’t take care of myself, but he took watching my back seriously and I had come to expect that. I would be doing the exact same thing if our situations were reversed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter might get some reworks, I have been on accidental hiatus since August when my best friend/sister died suddenly. I'm trying to work back into writing and it has taken this long to shake anything out of my head. So sorry if stuff here seems strange or if you feel I have forgotten something.


End file.
